Friends S01E12

Friends S01E12 Lyrics

Song Friends S01E12
Artist 英语听力
Album 老友记(第一季)
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[06:18.-3] But when you throw in T anya....
[06:23.-3] The sex of the baby,Ross.
[07:27.-3] I should probably just go.
[07:36.-2] Susan.
[09:42.-3] Oh,okay.
[10:44.-3] Well,you can use some of my sorts. I rarely use them.
[13:09.-2] -Fine! Want the birds? Get the birds! -Not like that,I won't.
[13:37.-3] Are your weekends longer than two days?
[14:34.-1] -Oh,my God! -I know. -oh,
[16:12.-4] -l' m the one he hit on. -I unleashed him on you. -
[17:43.-2] We should go and see if she's okay. Just one second.
[20:43.-4] Come here.
[23:25.-4] I'll only use my left hand.
[00:57.07] No,no,we're done!
[01:01.21] The One With the Dozen Lasagnas
[01:47.22] Aunt Silv,stop yelling!
[01:49.79] If you'd told me vegetarian lasagna...
[01:52.92] ... I would've made vegetarian lasagna.
[01:56.83] The meat's only every third layer. Maybe you could scrape.
[02:01.47] Ross,did you really read all these baby books?
[02:04.67] You could plunk me down in any woman's uterus,no compass...
[02:09.64] ...and I could find my way out like that!
[02:13.18] This is cool.
[02:14.51] It says in some parts of the world people eat the placenta.
[02:20.65] And we're done with the yogurt.
[02:24.59] Sorry.
[02:26.29] I did this as a favor. I am not a caterer.
[02:29.86] What do you want me to do with a dozen lasagnas?
[02:34.00] Nice talk,Aunt Silv.
[02:36.84] You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?
[02:40.44] Ross,listen. Do you know that right now your baby is only this big?
[02:45.61] This is your baby. " Hi,Daddy. "
[02:48.25] Hello.
[02:49.75] " How come you don't live with Mommy? "
[02:54.19] " How come Mommy lives with that other lady? "
[03:02.03] "What's a lesbian? "
[03:09.17] Honey,you can say it. Poconos.
[03:11.54] Poconos. It's like " poke a nose. "
[03:18.01] Poke a nose.
[03:29.25] -So did I hear Poconos? -Yes. -
[03:32.06] My sister's giving us her place for the weekend.
[03:35.56] First weekend together.
[03:37.50] -It's a big step. -I know. -
[03:40.77] -It's just a weekend. Big deal. -Wasn't this supposed to be a fling? -
[03:45.57] Shouldn't it be...
[03:47.47] ...flung by now?
[03:49.94] We are way past a "fling. "
[03:52.31] I' m feeling things I've read about in Danielle Steel books.
[03:56.55] When l' m with him, l' m just totally....
[03:59.68] Nauseous. I' m physically nauseous. …
[04:03.42] What am I supposed to do? Call lmmigration?
[04:07.79] I could call lmmigration.
[04:14.70] What? 什么?
[04:17.24] Ugly Naked Guy is making shadow puppets.
[04:21.71] Look,it's Abraham Lincoln.
[04:25.14] Oh,right!
[04:26.84] Go. Go!
[04:34.69] I love babies with their little baby shoes...
[04:38.49] ...and their little baby toes and their little hands....
[04:42.73] Okay,you' re gonna have to stop that. Forever.
[04:56.37] Need a new table.
[04:58.54] You think?
[05:07.15] -Come on in. -Hello.
[05:09.55] I brought the books...
[05:11.49] ...and Monica sends her love along with this lasagna.
[05:15.06] Great! Is it vegetarian? Because Susan doesn't eat meat.
[05:21.23] I' m pretty sure that it is.
[05:28.14] Nineteen weeks,the breasts are starting to swell.
[05:33.08] According to the literature.
[05:35.45] -I got the results of the amnio. -T ell me. Is everything...? -
[05:39.35] -T otally and completely healthy. -That is great! -
[05:48.83] When did you and Susan meet Huey Lewis?
[05:51.80] That's our friend T anya.
[06:03.54] Of course,it's your friend T anya.
[06:08.21] -Don't you wanna know about the sex? -The sex? -
[06:13.48] I' m having enough trouble with the image of you and Susan together.
[06:27.57] You know the sex of the baby?
[06:31.04] -Want to know? -No.
[06:32.84] I don't want to. Absolutely not.
[06:35.17] You shouldn't know until you look down there...
[06:38.44] ...and see," Oh,there it is. "
[06:41.05] Or isn't. Or isn't.
[06:45.28] -Hello,Ross. -Susan.
[06:47.92] So?
[06:49.62] So did you hear?
[06:51.12] Yes,we did. Everything's A-Okay.
[06:53.42] Oh,that's so cool!
[06:57.30] It really is.
[06:59.03] Do we know?
[07:00.43] We certainly do. It's going to be a
[07:03.57] Hello? Hello?
[07:04.77] A guy who doesn't wanna know is standing here.
[07:09.67] Well,is it what we thought it would be?
[07:19.45] What? 什么?
[07:21.49] What did we think it'd be?
[07:24.16] I don't wanna know. Don't wanna know.
[07:29.19] -Well,thanks for the books. -No problem. Okay.
[07:42.57] Who should we call first? Your folks or Deb and Rhona?
[07:50.78] Hello?
[07:54.19] Never mind. I don 't wanna know.
[07:57.49] Because it was my table, I have to buy a new one?
[08:01.23] -That's the rule. -What rule? There's no rule. -
[08:05.30] -You owe me a table. -How did you get there? -
[08:09.00] It was fine until your breakfast adventure with Angela Delvecio.
[08:14.44] You knew about that?
[08:16.17] The impressions in the butter left little to the imagination.
[08:21.21] How about if we split it?
[08:24.08] -What do you mean,buy it together? -Yeah.
[08:27.62] -Do you think we' re ready for that? -Why not? -
[08:31.92] It's a big commitment. What if one of us wants to move out?
[08:36.09] -You' re moving out? -l' m not. -
[08:38.43] -You'd tell me if you were,right? -Yes. -
[08:41.00] -It's just,with my last roommate -I know all about Kip. -
[08:45.64] We bought a hibachi,then he ran off and got married. Things got ugly.
[08:50.94] Let me ask you something. Was Kip a better roommate than me?
[08:56.01] Oh,don't do that.
[09:03.79] There's changes in your schedule.
[09:06.12] Your 4:00 herbal massage is at 4:30.
[09:09.46] And Miss Summerfield canceled her 5:30 shiatsu.
[09:12.83] Thanks.
[09:14.40] Oh,here comes your 3:00.
[09:16.53] I don't mean to sound unprofessional, but Yum!
[09:24.34] Paolo! Hi! What are you doing here?
[09:29.35] Rachella tell me you...
[09:33.45] ... massage? …
[09:34.92] Well,Rachella's right.
[09:43.53] I don't know what you just said, so let's start.
[09:48.27] I am...
[09:50.37] ... being naked?
[09:52.80] That's your decision. Some people prefer to take off
[09:58.58] Being naked!
[10:01.18] I can't believe you don't wanna know. I couldn't not know.
[10:05.38] If the doctor knows, Carol and Susan know
[10:08.69] And Monica knows.
[10:11.46] How? I don't even know.
[10:13.32] Carol called to thank me for the lasagna. She told me.
[10:17.13] So what's it gonna be?
[10:22.10] -Oh,great! Now he knows. -l' m just excited about being an aunt. -
[10:26.80] Or an uncle.
[10:33.54] -Hey,Phoebe. -Hey,Pheebs.
[10:35.88] Fine!
[10:40.08] -What's the matter? -Nothing. I' m just out of sorts. -
[10:48.03] Can we get some cappuccino over here?
[10:52.20] Oh,right! That's me!
[10:55.43] That table place closes at 7. Come on.
[10:58.77] Fine.
[11:01.84] What is it?
[11:04.24] -All right. You know Paolo? -l' m familiar with his work.
[11:09.51] He made a move on me.
[11:11.42] -The store will be open tomorrow. -More coffee,please. -
[11:16.69] Well,what happened?
[11:18.46] He came in for a massage, and everything was fine until....
[11:26.73] -Oh,my God. -Are you sure?
[11:30.23] Oh,yeah. I' m sure.
[11:36.11] And all of a sudden,his hands weren't the problem anymore.
[11:44.52] Was it...?
[11:45.72] Boy Scouts could've camped under there.
[11:52.62] Wow.
[11:53.89] -What did you do? -I dealt with it like a professional. -
[12:04.00] " Ooh," what?
[12:05.80] ma Thurman.
[12:07.07] -The actress! -Uma Thurman! -
[12:10.44] Thanks,Rach.
[12:14.41] -What'll you do? -You have to tell her. -
[12:17.01] It's your moral obligation as a friend, as a woman. It's a feminist issue.
[12:21.89] Guys?
[12:23.22] -You have to. -Feminist issue? That's where I went. -
[12:28.66] -She is gonna hate me! -Yeah,well.... -
[12:38.94] Will you pick one? Just pick one.
[12:41.41] -Here,how about that one? -That's patio furniture. -
[12:45.94] So what? Like people will come in and think," Oh,l' m outside again. "
[12:50.55] Fine.
[12:52.22] What about the birds?
[12:55.09] I don't know. They don't say, " Hello,sit here. Eat something. "
[13:01.00] -You pick one. -Okay. How about the ladybugs? -
[13:04.40] Forget about the birds,but big red insects suggest fine dining.
[13:16.31] Kip would have liked the birds.
[13:29.42] -Hi,Pheebs. -What's going on?
[13:31.59] -Are you moving out? -l' m getting ready for the weekend. -
[13:40.36] These aren't all my suitcases.
[13:42.63] This one's Paolo's.
[13:47.37] -Rachel,can we talk for a sec? -Well,sure.
[13:51.48] Just for a sec,Paolo's on his way.
[14:06.22] We haven't known each other that long.
[14:09.13] There are three things you should know:
[14:12.06] One,my friends are the most important thing in my life.
[14:16.77] Two,I never lie.
[14:19.40] And three,I make the best oatmeal raisin cookies in the world.
[14:26.04] Okay. Thanks,Pheebs. ok,
[14:36.79] Why have I never tasted these?
[14:39.16] I don't make them a lot,because it's not fair to the other cookies.
[14:50.13] These are the best oatmeal raisin cookies.
[14:53.50] -Which proves that I never lie. -I guess you don't. -
[14:57.58] Paolo made a pass at me.
[15:02.35] What do you think?
[15:03.81] It's the most beautiful table I've seen.
[15:06.88] I know.
[15:08.29] Will you balance plates on these heads?
[15:11.32] Who cares? We'll eat at the sink. Come on!
[15:16.33] Heads up,Ross.
[15:18.03] Score! You suck!
[15:23.47] Are you okay?
[15:27.91] I need some mik.
[15:31.01] Okay. I've got milk. Ok,
[15:38.02] Here you go.
[15:48.00] Better?
[15:51.06] No.
[15:54.73] I feel so stupid! I think about the other day with you guys.
[16:00.27] And I was all," Oh,Paolo! He's so great!
[16:04.07] He makes me feel so"
[16:06.58] God!
[16:08.38] I' m so embarrassed!
[16:10.21] I' m so embarrassed.
[16:15.59] If I had never met him
[16:17.66] -l' m so sorry. -No,l' m sorry.
[16:20.00] -l' m sorry. -l' m sorry. Wait. -
[16:22.56] -What are we sorry about? -I don't know.
[16:25.33] Right. He's the pig. Right. He's the pig.
[16:27.53] -Such a pig! -Oh,God,he's such a pig!
[16:30.50] He's like a big disgusting pig....
[16:34.24] -Pig man! -Yes,good!
[16:40.74] But he was my pig man!
[16:45.05] How did I not see this?
[16:48.79] Oh,I know!
[16:53.02] Because...
[16:55.06] ... he's gorgeous.
[16:56.83] And he's charming.
[16:58.63] -And when he looks -Okay,Pheebs.
[17:01.53] The end.
[17:05.44] God.
[17:08.47] Should I not have told you?
[17:11.31] T rust me,it's much better that I know.
[17:17.88] But I just liked it better before. It was better.
[17:38.64] She took it pretty well. Paolo's over there now,so....
[17:48.71] -Score! -Game! Nice!
[17:53.32] Come on,Pheebs.
[17:56.15] Well,it looks like we kicked your butts.
[17:59.32] She did. You could be on the Olympic "Standing There" team.
[18:03.69] Come on. Two on one.
[18:05.33] Why are you here? She just broke up with him.
[18:08.17] It's time for you to swoop in.
[18:11.10] -What,now? -Yes. Now is when you swoop.
[18:14.07] When Paolo walks out, you gotta be the first guy she sees.
[18:18.18] She's gotta know you' re everything he's not. You' re the anti-Paolo.
[18:24.65] My Catholic friend is right.
[18:26.78] She's distraught. You' re there for her.
[18:29.59] You pick up the pieces and then you usher in "The Age of Ross. "
[18:42.27] -See this? See? -Hold it! Ascolta!
[18:48.27] -How's it going? -Don't stare. -
[18:50.37] She threw his clothes off the balcony. Now there's gesturing and arm-waving.
[18:55.55] That is," How could you? " or " Enormous breasts! "
[19:01.15] Here he comes.
[19:13.30] I am...
[19:15.30] ...to say goodbye.
[19:17.27] Okay,bye-bye.
[19:22.24] Paolo,I really hate you for what you did,but I still have five of these...
[19:27.78] ...so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles.
[19:35.42] I just wanna tell you,and I think I'd speak for everyone when I say....
[19:46.86] Oh,just look at her.
[19:49.07] Guys,I think only one of us should go...
[19:51.80] -...so she's not overwhelmed. -Right. -
[19:54.34] And I really think it should be me.
[20:13.56] You all right?
[20:15.93] I've been better.
[20:19.20] I don't believe this.
[20:21.77] I wasn't supposed to care about this guy.
[20:25.04] It was just supposed to be this big,fun,ltalian thing.
[20:30.47] Someday I could look back and say, "That was a big,fun,ltalian thing. "
[20:36.85] It wasn't supposed to feel like this when it was over.
[20:51.36] Listen...
[20:53.06] ...you deserve so much better than him.
[20:56.33] I mean,you...
[20:58.67] ...should be with a guy who knows what he has when he has you.
[21:06.54] What?
[21:08.51] I' m so sick of guys!
[21:11.92] I don't want to look at or think about another guy.
[21:16.79] I don't even want to be near another guy.
[21:26.93] Ross,you' re so great.
[21:41.01] -Are you all right? -Are you okay?
[21:43.68] -Medium. Any cookies left? -Yeah.
[21:50.55] See,Rach...
[21:52.09] ... I don't think swearing off guys altogether is the answer.
[21:56.69] What you need is to develop a more sophisticated screening process.
[22:03.03] I just need to be by myself for a while.
[22:05.94] -I just gotta figure out what I want. -No,no. -
[22:10.34] See,because not all guys out there are gonna be a Paolo.
[22:14.51] No,I know. I know.
[22:16.65] And l' m sure your little boy's not gonna grow up to be one.
[22:21.72] -What? -What?
[22:26.46] I' m having a boy?
[22:28.76] No.
[22:31.03] No. In fact,you' re not having a boy.
[22:35.10] I' m having a boy.
[22:38.47] -Huh? Am I having a boy? -You' re having a boy! -
[22:42.67] I' m having a boy!
[22:44.11] -l' m having a boy! -What is it?
[22:46.38] I' m having a boy! I' m having a boy!
[22:52.75] We already knew that!
[22:57.72] I' m having a son.
[23:07.60] Yes! And that would be a shutdown!
[23:10.53] Shutout!
[23:15.24] Where you going? One more game!
[23:18.04] -It's 2:30 in the morning. -Yeah,get out!
[23:21.75] You guys always hang out in my apartment.
[23:27.62] Come on,wussies!
[23:33.46] All right! Okay! I gotta go!
[23:36.19] I' m going.
[23:37.79] And l' m gone.
[23:42.07] -One more game? -Oh,yeah.
[06:18.-3] But when you throw in T anya....
[06:23.-3] The sex of the baby, Ross.
[07:27.-3] I should probably just go.
[07:36.-2] Susan.
[09:42.-3] Oh, okay.
[10:44.-3] Well, you can use some of my sorts. I rarely use them.
[13:09.-2] Fine! Want the birds? Get the birds! Not like that, I won' t.
[13:37.-3] Are your weekends longer than two days?
[14:34.-1] Oh, my God! I know. oh,
[16:12.-4] l' m the one he hit on. I unleashed him on you.
[17:43.-2] We should go and see if she' s okay. Just one second.
[20:43.-4] Come here.
[23:25.-4] I' ll only use my left hand.
[00:57.07] No, no, we' re done!
[01:01.21] The One With the Dozen Lasagnas
[01:47.22] Aunt Silv, stop yelling!
[01:49.79] If you' d told me vegetarian lasagna...
[01:52.92] ... I would' ve made vegetarian lasagna.
[01:56.83] The meat' s only every third layer. Maybe you could scrape.
[02:01.47] Ross, did you really read all these baby books?
[02:04.67] You could plunk me down in any woman' s uterus, no compass...
[02:09.64] ... and I could find my way out like that!
[02:13.18] This is cool.
[02:14.51] It says in some parts of the world people eat the placenta.
[02:20.65] And we' re done with the yogurt.
[02:24.59] Sorry.
[02:26.29] I did this as a favor. I am not a caterer.
[02:29.86] What do you want me to do with a dozen lasagnas?
[02:34.00] Nice talk, Aunt Silv.
[02:36.84] You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?
[02:40.44] Ross, listen. Do you know that right now your baby is only this big?
[02:45.61] This is your baby. " Hi, Daddy. "
[02:48.25] Hello.
[02:49.75] " How come you don' t live with Mommy? "
[02:54.19] " How come Mommy lives with that other lady? "
[03:02.03] " What' s a lesbian? "
[03:09.17] Honey, you can say it. Poconos.
[03:11.54] Poconos. It' s like " poke a nose. "
[03:18.01] Poke a nose.
[03:29.25] So did I hear Poconos? Yes.
[03:32.06] My sister' s giving us her place for the weekend.
[03:35.56] First weekend together.
[03:37.50] It' s a big step. I know.
[03:40.77] It' s just a weekend. Big deal. Wasn' t this supposed to be a fling?
[03:45.57] Shouldn' t it be...
[03:47.47] ... flung by now?
[03:49.94] We are way past a " fling. "
[03:52.31] I' m feeling things I' ve read about in Danielle Steel books.
[03:56.55] When l' m with him, l' m just totally....
[03:59.68] Nauseous. I' m physically nauseous.
[04:03.42] What am I supposed to do? Call lmmigration?
[04:07.79] I could call lmmigration.
[04:14.70] What? shen me?
[04:17.24] Ugly Naked Guy is making shadow puppets.
[04:21.71] Look, it' s Abraham Lincoln.
[04:25.14] Oh, right!
[04:26.84] Go. Go!
[04:34.69] I love babies with their little baby shoes...
[04:38.49] ... and their little baby toes and their little hands....
[04:42.73] Okay, you' re gonna have to stop that. Forever.
[04:56.37] Need a new table.
[04:58.54] You think?
[05:07.15] Come on in. Hello.
[05:09.55] I brought the books...
[05:11.49] ... and Monica sends her love along with this lasagna.
[05:15.06] Great! Is it vegetarian? Because Susan doesn' t eat meat.
[05:21.23] I' m pretty sure that it is.
[05:28.14] Nineteen weeks, the breasts are starting to swell.
[05:33.08] According to the literature.
[05:35.45] I got the results of the amnio. T ell me. Is everything...?
[05:39.35] T otally and completely healthy. That is great!
[05:48.83] When did you and Susan meet Huey Lewis?
[05:51.80] That' s our friend T anya.
[06:03.54] Of course, it' s your friend T anya.
[06:08.21] Don' t you wanna know about the sex? The sex?
[06:13.48] I' m having enough trouble with the image of you and Susan together.
[06:27.57] You know the sex of the baby?
[06:31.04] Want to know? No.
[06:32.84] I don' t want to. Absolutely not.
[06:35.17] You shouldn' t know until you look down there...
[06:38.44] ... and see," Oh, there it is. "
[06:41.05] Or isn' t. Or isn' t.
[06:45.28] Hello, Ross. Susan.
[06:47.92] So?
[06:49.62] So did you hear?
[06:51.12] Yes, we did. Everything' s AOkay.
[06:53.42] Oh, that' s so cool!
[06:57.30] It really is.
[06:59.03] Do we know?
[07:00.43] We certainly do. It' s going to be a
[07:03.57] Hello? Hello?
[07:04.77] A guy who doesn' t wanna know is standing here.
[07:09.67] Well, is it what we thought it would be?
[07:19.45] What? shen me?
[07:21.49] What did we think it' d be?
[07:24.16] I don' t wanna know. Don' t wanna know.
[07:29.19] Well, thanks for the books. No problem. Okay.
[07:42.57] Who should we call first? Your folks or Deb and Rhona?
[07:50.78] Hello?
[07:54.19] Never mind. I don ' t wanna know.
[07:57.49] Because it was my table, I have to buy a new one?
[08:01.23] That' s the rule. What rule? There' s no rule.
[08:05.30] You owe me a table. How did you get there?
[08:09.00] It was fine until your breakfast adventure with Angela Delvecio.
[08:14.44] You knew about that?
[08:16.17] The impressions in the butter left little to the imagination.
[08:21.21] How about if we split it?
[08:24.08] What do you mean, buy it together? Yeah.
[08:27.62] Do you think we' re ready for that? Why not?
[08:31.92] It' s a big commitment. What if one of us wants to move out?
[08:36.09] You' re moving out? l' m not.
[08:38.43] You' d tell me if you were, right? Yes.
[08:41.00] It' s just, with my last roommate I know all about Kip.
[08:45.64] We bought a hibachi, then he ran off and got married. Things got ugly.
[08:50.94] Let me ask you something. Was Kip a better roommate than me?
[08:56.01] Oh, don' t do that.
[09:03.79] There' s changes in your schedule.
[09:06.12] Your 4: 00 herbal massage is at 4: 30.
[09:09.46] And Miss Summerfield canceled her 5: 30 shiatsu.
[09:12.83] Thanks.
[09:14.40] Oh, here comes your 3: 00.
[09:16.53] I don' t mean to sound unprofessional, but Yum!
[09:24.34] Paolo! Hi! What are you doing here?
[09:29.35] Rachella tell me you...
[09:33.45] ... massage?
[09:34.92] Well, Rachella' s right.
[09:43.53] I don' t know what you just said, so let' s start.
[09:48.27] I am...
[09:50.37] ... being naked?
[09:52.80] That' s your decision. Some people prefer to take off
[09:58.58] Being naked!
[10:01.18] I can' t believe you don' t wanna know. I couldn' t not know.
[10:05.38] If the doctor knows, Carol and Susan know
[10:08.69] And Monica knows.
[10:11.46] How? I don' t even know.
[10:13.32] Carol called to thank me for the lasagna. She told me.
[10:17.13] So what' s it gonna be?
[10:22.10] Oh, great! Now he knows. l' m just excited about being an aunt.
[10:26.80] Or an uncle.
[10:33.54] Hey, Phoebe. Hey, Pheebs.
[10:35.88] Fine!
[10:40.08] What' s the matter? Nothing. I' m just out of sorts.
[10:48.03] Can we get some cappuccino over here?
[10:52.20] Oh, right! That' s me!
[10:55.43] That table place closes at 7. Come on.
[10:58.77] Fine.
[11:01.84] What is it?
[11:04.24] All right. You know Paolo? l' m familiar with his work.
[11:09.51] He made a move on me.
[11:11.42] The store will be open tomorrow. More coffee, please.
[11:16.69] Well, what happened?
[11:18.46] He came in for a massage, and everything was fine until....
[11:26.73] Oh, my God. Are you sure?
[11:30.23] Oh, yeah. I' m sure.
[11:36.11] And all of a sudden, his hands weren' t the problem anymore.
[11:44.52] Was it...?
[11:45.72] Boy Scouts could' ve camped under there.
[11:52.62] Wow.
[11:53.89] What did you do? I dealt with it like a professional.
[12:04.00] " Ooh," what?
[12:05.80] ma Thurman.
[12:07.07] The actress! Uma Thurman!
[12:10.44] Thanks, Rach.
[12:14.41] What' ll you do? You have to tell her.
[12:17.01] It' s your moral obligation as a friend, as a woman. It' s a feminist issue.
[12:21.89] Guys?
[12:23.22] You have to. Feminist issue? That' s where I went.
[12:28.66] She is gonna hate me! Yeah, well....
[12:38.94] Will you pick one? Just pick one.
[12:41.41] Here, how about that one? That' s patio furniture.
[12:45.94] So what? Like people will come in and think," Oh, l' m outside again. "
[12:50.55] Fine.
[12:52.22] What about the birds?
[12:55.09] I don' t know. They don' t say, " Hello, sit here. Eat something. "
[13:01.00] You pick one. Okay. How about the ladybugs?
[13:04.40] Forget about the birds, but big red insects suggest fine dining.
[13:16.31] Kip would have liked the birds.
[13:29.42] Hi, Pheebs. What' s going on?
[13:31.59] Are you moving out? l' m getting ready for the weekend.
[13:40.36] These aren' t all my suitcases.
[13:42.63] This one' s Paolo' s.
[13:47.37] Rachel, can we talk for a sec? Well, sure.
[13:51.48] Just for a sec, Paolo' s on his way.
[14:06.22] We haven' t known each other that long.
[14:09.13] There are three things you should know:
[14:12.06] One, my friends are the most important thing in my life.
[14:16.77] Two, I never lie.
[14:19.40] And three, I make the best oatmeal raisin cookies in the world.
[14:26.04] Okay. Thanks, Pheebs. ok,
[14:36.79] Why have I never tasted these?
[14:39.16] I don' t make them a lot, because it' s not fair to the other cookies.
[14:50.13] These are the best oatmeal raisin cookies.
[14:53.50] Which proves that I never lie. I guess you don' t.
[14:57.58] Paolo made a pass at me.
[15:02.35] What do you think?
[15:03.81] It' s the most beautiful table I' ve seen.
[15:06.88] I know.
[15:08.29] Will you balance plates on these heads?
[15:11.32] Who cares? We' ll eat at the sink. Come on!
[15:16.33] Heads up, Ross.
[15:18.03] Score! You suck!
[15:23.47] Are you okay?
[15:27.91] I need some mik.
[15:31.01] Okay. I' ve got milk. Ok,
[15:38.02] Here you go.
[15:48.00] Better?
[15:51.06] No.
[15:54.73] I feel so stupid! I think about the other day with you guys.
[16:00.27] And I was all," Oh, Paolo! He' s so great!
[16:04.07] He makes me feel so"
[16:06.58] God!
[16:08.38] I' m so embarrassed!
[16:10.21] I' m so embarrassed.
[16:15.59] If I had never met him
[16:17.66] l' m so sorry. No, l' m sorry.
[16:20.00] l' m sorry. l' m sorry. Wait.
[16:22.56] What are we sorry about? I don' t know.
[16:25.33] Right. He' s the pig. Right. He' s the pig.
[16:27.53] Such a pig! Oh, God, he' s such a pig!
[16:30.50] He' s like a big disgusting pig....
[16:34.24] Pig man! Yes, good!
[16:40.74] But he was my pig man!
[16:45.05] How did I not see this?
[16:48.79] Oh, I know!
[16:53.02] Because...
[16:55.06] ... he' s gorgeous.
[16:56.83] And he' s charming.
[16:58.63] And when he looks Okay, Pheebs.
[17:01.53] The end.
[17:05.44] God.
[17:08.47] Should I not have told you?
[17:11.31] T rust me, it' s much better that I know.
[17:17.88] But I just liked it better before. It was better.
[17:38.64] She took it pretty well. Paolo' s over there now, so....
[17:48.71] Score! Game! Nice!
[17:53.32] Come on, Pheebs.
[17:56.15] Well, it looks like we kicked your butts.
[17:59.32] She did. You could be on the Olympic " Standing There" team.
[18:03.69] Come on. Two on one.
[18:05.33] Why are you here? She just broke up with him.
[18:08.17] It' s time for you to swoop in.
[18:11.10] What, now? Yes. Now is when you swoop.
[18:14.07] When Paolo walks out, you gotta be the first guy she sees.
[18:18.18] She' s gotta know you' re everything he' s not. You' re the antiPaolo.
[18:24.65] My Catholic friend is right.
[18:26.78] She' s distraught. You' re there for her.
[18:29.59] You pick up the pieces and then you usher in " The Age of Ross. "
[18:42.27] See this? See? Hold it! Ascolta!
[18:48.27] How' s it going? Don' t stare.
[18:50.37] She threw his clothes off the balcony. Now there' s gesturing and armwaving.
[18:55.55] That is," How could you? " or " Enormous breasts! "
[19:01.15] Here he comes.
[19:13.30] I am...
[19:15.30] ... to say goodbye.
[19:17.27] Okay, byebye.
[19:22.24] Paolo, I really hate you for what you did, but I still have five of these...
[19:27.78] ... so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles.
[19:35.42] I just wanna tell you, and I think I' d speak for everyone when I say....
[19:46.86] Oh, just look at her.
[19:49.07] Guys, I think only one of us should go...
[19:51.80] ... so she' s not overwhelmed. Right.
[19:54.34] And I really think it should be me.
[20:13.56] You all right?
[20:15.93] I' ve been better.
[20:19.20] I don' t believe this.
[20:21.77] I wasn' t supposed to care about this guy.
[20:25.04] It was just supposed to be this big, fun, ltalian thing.
[20:30.47] Someday I could look back and say, " That was a big, fun, ltalian thing. "
[20:36.85] It wasn' t supposed to feel like this when it was over.
[20:51.36] Listen...
[20:53.06] ... you deserve so much better than him.
[20:56.33] I mean, you...
[20:58.67] ... should be with a guy who knows what he has when he has you.
[21:06.54] What?
[21:08.51] I' m so sick of guys!
[21:11.92] I don' t want to look at or think about another guy.
[21:16.79] I don' t even want to be near another guy.
[21:26.93] Ross, you' re so great.
[21:41.01] Are you all right? Are you okay?
[21:43.68] Medium. Any cookies left? Yeah.
[21:50.55] See, Rach...
[21:52.09] ... I don' t think swearing off guys altogether is the answer.
[21:56.69] What you need is to develop a more sophisticated screening process.
[22:03.03] I just need to be by myself for a while.
[22:05.94] I just gotta figure out what I want. No, no.
[22:10.34] See, because not all guys out there are gonna be a Paolo.
[22:14.51] No, I know. I know.
[22:16.65] And l' m sure your little boy' s not gonna grow up to be one.
[22:21.72] What? What?
[22:26.46] I' m having a boy?
[22:28.76] No.
[22:31.03] No. In fact, you' re not having a boy.
[22:35.10] I' m having a boy.
[22:38.47] Huh? Am I having a boy? You' re having a boy!
[22:42.67] I' m having a boy!
[22:44.11] l' m having a boy! What is it?
[22:46.38] I' m having a boy! I' m having a boy!
[22:52.75] We already knew that!
[22:57.72] I' m having a son.
[23:07.60] Yes! And that would be a shutdown!
[23:10.53] Shutout!
[23:15.24] Where you going? One more game!
[23:18.04] It' s 2: 30 in the morning. Yeah, get out!
[23:21.75] You guys always hang out in my apartment.
[23:27.62] Come on, wussies!
[23:33.46] All right! Okay! I gotta go!
[23:36.19] I' m going.
[23:37.79] And l' m gone.
[23:42.07] One more game? Oh, yeah.
[06:18.-3] But when you throw in T anya....
[06:23.-3] The sex of the baby, Ross.
[07:27.-3] I should probably just go.
[07:36.-2] Susan.
[09:42.-3] Oh, okay.
[10:44.-3] Well, you can use some of my sorts. I rarely use them.
[13:09.-2] Fine! Want the birds? Get the birds! Not like that, I won' t.
[13:37.-3] Are your weekends longer than two days?
[14:34.-1] Oh, my God! I know. oh,
[16:12.-4] l' m the one he hit on. I unleashed him on you.
[17:43.-2] We should go and see if she' s okay. Just one second.
[20:43.-4] Come here.
[23:25.-4] I' ll only use my left hand.
[00:57.07] No, no, we' re done!
[01:01.21] The One With the Dozen Lasagnas
[01:47.22] Aunt Silv, stop yelling!
[01:49.79] If you' d told me vegetarian lasagna...
[01:52.92] ... I would' ve made vegetarian lasagna.
[01:56.83] The meat' s only every third layer. Maybe you could scrape.
[02:01.47] Ross, did you really read all these baby books?
[02:04.67] You could plunk me down in any woman' s uterus, no compass...
[02:09.64] ... and I could find my way out like that!
[02:13.18] This is cool.
[02:14.51] It says in some parts of the world people eat the placenta.
[02:20.65] And we' re done with the yogurt.
[02:24.59] Sorry.
[02:26.29] I did this as a favor. I am not a caterer.
[02:29.86] What do you want me to do with a dozen lasagnas?
[02:34.00] Nice talk, Aunt Silv.
[02:36.84] You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?
[02:40.44] Ross, listen. Do you know that right now your baby is only this big?
[02:45.61] This is your baby. " Hi, Daddy. "
[02:48.25] Hello.
[02:49.75] " How come you don' t live with Mommy? "
[02:54.19] " How come Mommy lives with that other lady? "
[03:02.03] " What' s a lesbian? "
[03:09.17] Honey, you can say it. Poconos.
[03:11.54] Poconos. It' s like " poke a nose. "
[03:18.01] Poke a nose.
[03:29.25] So did I hear Poconos? Yes.
[03:32.06] My sister' s giving us her place for the weekend.
[03:35.56] First weekend together.
[03:37.50] It' s a big step. I know.
[03:40.77] It' s just a weekend. Big deal. Wasn' t this supposed to be a fling?
[03:45.57] Shouldn' t it be...
[03:47.47] ... flung by now?
[03:49.94] We are way past a " fling. "
[03:52.31] I' m feeling things I' ve read about in Danielle Steel books.
[03:56.55] When l' m with him, l' m just totally....
[03:59.68] Nauseous. I' m physically nauseous.
[04:03.42] What am I supposed to do? Call lmmigration?
[04:07.79] I could call lmmigration.
[04:14.70] What? shén me?
[04:17.24] Ugly Naked Guy is making shadow puppets.
[04:21.71] Look, it' s Abraham Lincoln.
[04:25.14] Oh, right!
[04:26.84] Go. Go!
[04:34.69] I love babies with their little baby shoes...
[04:38.49] ... and their little baby toes and their little hands....
[04:42.73] Okay, you' re gonna have to stop that. Forever.
[04:56.37] Need a new table.
[04:58.54] You think?
[05:07.15] Come on in. Hello.
[05:09.55] I brought the books...
[05:11.49] ... and Monica sends her love along with this lasagna.
[05:15.06] Great! Is it vegetarian? Because Susan doesn' t eat meat.
[05:21.23] I' m pretty sure that it is.
[05:28.14] Nineteen weeks, the breasts are starting to swell.
[05:33.08] According to the literature.
[05:35.45] I got the results of the amnio. T ell me. Is everything...?
[05:39.35] T otally and completely healthy. That is great!
[05:48.83] When did you and Susan meet Huey Lewis?
[05:51.80] That' s our friend T anya.
[06:03.54] Of course, it' s your friend T anya.
[06:08.21] Don' t you wanna know about the sex? The sex?
[06:13.48] I' m having enough trouble with the image of you and Susan together.
[06:27.57] You know the sex of the baby?
[06:31.04] Want to know? No.
[06:32.84] I don' t want to. Absolutely not.
[06:35.17] You shouldn' t know until you look down there...
[06:38.44] ... and see," Oh, there it is. "
[06:41.05] Or isn' t. Or isn' t.
[06:45.28] Hello, Ross. Susan.
[06:47.92] So?
[06:49.62] So did you hear?
[06:51.12] Yes, we did. Everything' s AOkay.
[06:53.42] Oh, that' s so cool!
[06:57.30] It really is.
[06:59.03] Do we know?
[07:00.43] We certainly do. It' s going to be a
[07:03.57] Hello? Hello?
[07:04.77] A guy who doesn' t wanna know is standing here.
[07:09.67] Well, is it what we thought it would be?
[07:19.45] What? shén me?
[07:21.49] What did we think it' d be?
[07:24.16] I don' t wanna know. Don' t wanna know.
[07:29.19] Well, thanks for the books. No problem. Okay.
[07:42.57] Who should we call first? Your folks or Deb and Rhona?
[07:50.78] Hello?
[07:54.19] Never mind. I don ' t wanna know.
[07:57.49] Because it was my table, I have to buy a new one?
[08:01.23] That' s the rule. What rule? There' s no rule.
[08:05.30] You owe me a table. How did you get there?
[08:09.00] It was fine until your breakfast adventure with Angela Delvecio.
[08:14.44] You knew about that?
[08:16.17] The impressions in the butter left little to the imagination.
[08:21.21] How about if we split it?
[08:24.08] What do you mean, buy it together? Yeah.
[08:27.62] Do you think we' re ready for that? Why not?
[08:31.92] It' s a big commitment. What if one of us wants to move out?
[08:36.09] You' re moving out? l' m not.
[08:38.43] You' d tell me if you were, right? Yes.
[08:41.00] It' s just, with my last roommate I know all about Kip.
[08:45.64] We bought a hibachi, then he ran off and got married. Things got ugly.
[08:50.94] Let me ask you something. Was Kip a better roommate than me?
[08:56.01] Oh, don' t do that.
[09:03.79] There' s changes in your schedule.
[09:06.12] Your 4: 00 herbal massage is at 4: 30.
[09:09.46] And Miss Summerfield canceled her 5: 30 shiatsu.
[09:12.83] Thanks.
[09:14.40] Oh, here comes your 3: 00.
[09:16.53] I don' t mean to sound unprofessional, but Yum!
[09:24.34] Paolo! Hi! What are you doing here?
[09:29.35] Rachella tell me you...
[09:33.45] ... massage?
[09:34.92] Well, Rachella' s right.
[09:43.53] I don' t know what you just said, so let' s start.
[09:48.27] I am...
[09:50.37] ... being naked?
[09:52.80] That' s your decision. Some people prefer to take off
[09:58.58] Being naked!
[10:01.18] I can' t believe you don' t wanna know. I couldn' t not know.
[10:05.38] If the doctor knows, Carol and Susan know
[10:08.69] And Monica knows.
[10:11.46] How? I don' t even know.
[10:13.32] Carol called to thank me for the lasagna. She told me.
[10:17.13] So what' s it gonna be?
[10:22.10] Oh, great! Now he knows. l' m just excited about being an aunt.
[10:26.80] Or an uncle.
[10:33.54] Hey, Phoebe. Hey, Pheebs.
[10:35.88] Fine!
[10:40.08] What' s the matter? Nothing. I' m just out of sorts.
[10:48.03] Can we get some cappuccino over here?
[10:52.20] Oh, right! That' s me!
[10:55.43] That table place closes at 7. Come on.
[10:58.77] Fine.
[11:01.84] What is it?
[11:04.24] All right. You know Paolo? l' m familiar with his work.
[11:09.51] He made a move on me.
[11:11.42] The store will be open tomorrow. More coffee, please.
[11:16.69] Well, what happened?
[11:18.46] He came in for a massage, and everything was fine until....
[11:26.73] Oh, my God. Are you sure?
[11:30.23] Oh, yeah. I' m sure.
[11:36.11] And all of a sudden, his hands weren' t the problem anymore.
[11:44.52] Was it...?
[11:45.72] Boy Scouts could' ve camped under there.
[11:52.62] Wow.
[11:53.89] What did you do? I dealt with it like a professional.
[12:04.00] " Ooh," what?
[12:05.80] ma Thurman.
[12:07.07] The actress! Uma Thurman!
[12:10.44] Thanks, Rach.
[12:14.41] What' ll you do? You have to tell her.
[12:17.01] It' s your moral obligation as a friend, as a woman. It' s a feminist issue.
[12:21.89] Guys?
[12:23.22] You have to. Feminist issue? That' s where I went.
[12:28.66] She is gonna hate me! Yeah, well....
[12:38.94] Will you pick one? Just pick one.
[12:41.41] Here, how about that one? That' s patio furniture.
[12:45.94] So what? Like people will come in and think," Oh, l' m outside again. "
[12:50.55] Fine.
[12:52.22] What about the birds?
[12:55.09] I don' t know. They don' t say, " Hello, sit here. Eat something. "
[13:01.00] You pick one. Okay. How about the ladybugs?
[13:04.40] Forget about the birds, but big red insects suggest fine dining.
[13:16.31] Kip would have liked the birds.
[13:29.42] Hi, Pheebs. What' s going on?
[13:31.59] Are you moving out? l' m getting ready for the weekend.
[13:40.36] These aren' t all my suitcases.
[13:42.63] This one' s Paolo' s.
[13:47.37] Rachel, can we talk for a sec? Well, sure.
[13:51.48] Just for a sec, Paolo' s on his way.
[14:06.22] We haven' t known each other that long.
[14:09.13] There are three things you should know:
[14:12.06] One, my friends are the most important thing in my life.
[14:16.77] Two, I never lie.
[14:19.40] And three, I make the best oatmeal raisin cookies in the world.
[14:26.04] Okay. Thanks, Pheebs. ok,
[14:36.79] Why have I never tasted these?
[14:39.16] I don' t make them a lot, because it' s not fair to the other cookies.
[14:50.13] These are the best oatmeal raisin cookies.
[14:53.50] Which proves that I never lie. I guess you don' t.
[14:57.58] Paolo made a pass at me.
[15:02.35] What do you think?
[15:03.81] It' s the most beautiful table I' ve seen.
[15:06.88] I know.
[15:08.29] Will you balance plates on these heads?
[15:11.32] Who cares? We' ll eat at the sink. Come on!
[15:16.33] Heads up, Ross.
[15:18.03] Score! You suck!
[15:23.47] Are you okay?
[15:27.91] I need some mik.
[15:31.01] Okay. I' ve got milk. Ok,
[15:38.02] Here you go.
[15:48.00] Better?
[15:51.06] No.
[15:54.73] I feel so stupid! I think about the other day with you guys.
[16:00.27] And I was all," Oh, Paolo! He' s so great!
[16:04.07] He makes me feel so"
[16:06.58] God!
[16:08.38] I' m so embarrassed!
[16:10.21] I' m so embarrassed.
[16:15.59] If I had never met him
[16:17.66] l' m so sorry. No, l' m sorry.
[16:20.00] l' m sorry. l' m sorry. Wait.
[16:22.56] What are we sorry about? I don' t know.
[16:25.33] Right. He' s the pig. Right. He' s the pig.
[16:27.53] Such a pig! Oh, God, he' s such a pig!
[16:30.50] He' s like a big disgusting pig....
[16:34.24] Pig man! Yes, good!
[16:40.74] But he was my pig man!
[16:45.05] How did I not see this?
[16:48.79] Oh, I know!
[16:53.02] Because...
[16:55.06] ... he' s gorgeous.
[16:56.83] And he' s charming.
[16:58.63] And when he looks Okay, Pheebs.
[17:01.53] The end.
[17:05.44] God.
[17:08.47] Should I not have told you?
[17:11.31] T rust me, it' s much better that I know.
[17:17.88] But I just liked it better before. It was better.
[17:38.64] She took it pretty well. Paolo' s over there now, so....
[17:48.71] Score! Game! Nice!
[17:53.32] Come on, Pheebs.
[17:56.15] Well, it looks like we kicked your butts.
[17:59.32] She did. You could be on the Olympic " Standing There" team.
[18:03.69] Come on. Two on one.
[18:05.33] Why are you here? She just broke up with him.
[18:08.17] It' s time for you to swoop in.
[18:11.10] What, now? Yes. Now is when you swoop.
[18:14.07] When Paolo walks out, you gotta be the first guy she sees.
[18:18.18] She' s gotta know you' re everything he' s not. You' re the antiPaolo.
[18:24.65] My Catholic friend is right.
[18:26.78] She' s distraught. You' re there for her.
[18:29.59] You pick up the pieces and then you usher in " The Age of Ross. "
[18:42.27] See this? See? Hold it! Ascolta!
[18:48.27] How' s it going? Don' t stare.
[18:50.37] She threw his clothes off the balcony. Now there' s gesturing and armwaving.
[18:55.55] That is," How could you? " or " Enormous breasts! "
[19:01.15] Here he comes.
[19:13.30] I am...
[19:15.30] ... to say goodbye.
[19:17.27] Okay, byebye.
[19:22.24] Paolo, I really hate you for what you did, but I still have five of these...
[19:27.78] ... so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles.
[19:35.42] I just wanna tell you, and I think I' d speak for everyone when I say....
[19:46.86] Oh, just look at her.
[19:49.07] Guys, I think only one of us should go...
[19:51.80] ... so she' s not overwhelmed. Right.
[19:54.34] And I really think it should be me.
[20:13.56] You all right?
[20:15.93] I' ve been better.
[20:19.20] I don' t believe this.
[20:21.77] I wasn' t supposed to care about this guy.
[20:25.04] It was just supposed to be this big, fun, ltalian thing.
[20:30.47] Someday I could look back and say, " That was a big, fun, ltalian thing. "
[20:36.85] It wasn' t supposed to feel like this when it was over.
[20:51.36] Listen...
[20:53.06] ... you deserve so much better than him.
[20:56.33] I mean, you...
[20:58.67] ... should be with a guy who knows what he has when he has you.
[21:06.54] What?
[21:08.51] I' m so sick of guys!
[21:11.92] I don' t want to look at or think about another guy.
[21:16.79] I don' t even want to be near another guy.
[21:26.93] Ross, you' re so great.
[21:41.01] Are you all right? Are you okay?
[21:43.68] Medium. Any cookies left? Yeah.
[21:50.55] See, Rach...
[21:52.09] ... I don' t think swearing off guys altogether is the answer.
[21:56.69] What you need is to develop a more sophisticated screening process.
[22:03.03] I just need to be by myself for a while.
[22:05.94] I just gotta figure out what I want. No, no.
[22:10.34] See, because not all guys out there are gonna be a Paolo.
[22:14.51] No, I know. I know.
[22:16.65] And l' m sure your little boy' s not gonna grow up to be one.
[22:21.72] What? What?
[22:26.46] I' m having a boy?
[22:28.76] No.
[22:31.03] No. In fact, you' re not having a boy.
[22:35.10] I' m having a boy.
[22:38.47] Huh? Am I having a boy? You' re having a boy!
[22:42.67] I' m having a boy!
[22:44.11] l' m having a boy! What is it?
[22:46.38] I' m having a boy! I' m having a boy!
[22:52.75] We already knew that!
[22:57.72] I' m having a son.
[23:07.60] Yes! And that would be a shutdown!
[23:10.53] Shutout!
[23:15.24] Where you going? One more game!
[23:18.04] It' s 2: 30 in the morning. Yeah, get out!
[23:21.75] You guys always hang out in my apartment.
[23:27.62] Come on, wussies!
[23:33.46] All right! Okay! I gotta go!
[23:36.19] I' m going.
[23:37.79] And l' m gone.
[23:42.07] One more game? Oh, yeah.
Friends S01E12 Lyrics
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