[06:18.-3]But when you throw in T anya....
[06:23.-3]The sex of the baby,Ross.
[07:27.-3]I should probably just go.
[07:36.-2]Susan.
[09:42.-3]Oh,okay.
[10:44.-3]Well,you can use some of my sorts. I rarely use them.
[13:09.-2]-Fine! Want the birds? Get the birds! -Not like that,I won't.
[13:37.-3]Are your weekends longer than two days?
[14:34.-1]-Oh,my God! -I know. -oh,
[16:12.-4]-l' m the one he hit on. -I unleashed him on you. -
[17:43.-2]We should go and see if she's okay. Just one second.
[20:43.-4]Come here.
[23:25.-4]I'll only use my left hand.
[00:57.07]No,no,we're done!
[01:01.21]The One With the Dozen Lasagnas
[01:47.22]Aunt Silv,stop yelling!
[01:49.79]If you'd told me vegetarian lasagna...
[01:52.92]... I would've made vegetarian lasagna.
[01:56.83]The meat's only every third layer. Maybe you could scrape.
[02:01.47]Ross,did you really read all these baby books?
[02:04.67]You could plunk me down in any woman's uterus,no compass...
[02:09.64]...and I could find my way out like that!
[02:13.18]This is cool.
[02:14.51]It says in some parts of the world people eat the placenta.
[02:20.65]And we're done with the yogurt.
[02:24.59]Sorry.
[02:26.29]I did this as a favor. I am not a caterer.
[02:29.86]What do you want me to do with a dozen lasagnas?
[02:34.00]Nice talk,Aunt Silv.
[02:36.84]You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?
[02:40.44]Ross,listen. Do you know that right now your baby is only this big?
[02:45.61]This is your baby. " Hi,Daddy. "
[02:48.25]Hello.
[02:49.75]" How come you don't live with Mommy? "
[02:54.19]" How come Mommy lives with that other lady? "
[03:02.03]"What's a lesbian? "
[03:09.17]Honey,you can say it. Poconos.
[03:11.54]Poconos. It's like " poke a nose. "
[03:18.01]Poke a nose.
[03:29.25]-So did I hear Poconos? -Yes. -
[03:32.06]My sister's giving us her place for the weekend.
[03:35.56]First weekend together.
[03:37.50]-It's a big step. -I know. -
[03:40.77]-It's just a weekend. Big deal. -Wasn't this supposed to be a fling? -
[03:45.57]Shouldn't it be...
[03:47.47]...flung by now?
[03:49.94]We are way past a "fling. "
[03:52.31]I' m feeling things I've read about in Danielle Steel books.
[03:56.55]When l' m with him, l' m just totally....
[03:59.68]Nauseous. I' m physically nauseous. …
[04:03.42]What am I supposed to do? Call lmmigration?
[04:07.79]I could call lmmigration.
[04:14.70]What? 什么?
[04:17.24]Ugly Naked Guy is making shadow puppets.
[04:21.71]Look,it's Abraham Lincoln.
[04:25.14]Oh,right!
[04:26.84]Go. Go!
[04:34.69]I love babies with their little baby shoes...
[04:38.49]...and their little baby toes and their little hands....
[04:42.73]Okay,you' re gonna have to stop that. Forever.
[04:56.37]Need a new table.
[04:58.54]You think?
[05:07.15]-Come on in. -Hello.
[05:09.55]I brought the books...
[05:11.49]...and Monica sends her love along with this lasagna.
[05:15.06]Great! Is it vegetarian? Because Susan doesn't eat meat.
[05:21.23]I' m pretty sure that it is.
[05:28.14]Nineteen weeks,the breasts are starting to swell.
[05:33.08]According to the literature.
[05:35.45]-I got the results of the amnio. -T ell me. Is everything...? -
[05:39.35]-T otally and completely healthy. -That is great! -
[05:48.83]When did you and Susan meet Huey Lewis?
[05:51.80]That's our friend T anya.
[06:03.54]Of course,it's your friend T anya.
[06:08.21]-Don't you wanna know about the sex? -The sex? -
[06:13.48]I' m having enough trouble with the image of you and Susan together.
[06:27.57]You know the sex of the baby?
[06:31.04]-Want to know? -No.
[06:32.84]I don't want to. Absolutely not.
[06:35.17]You shouldn't know until you look down there...
[06:38.44]...and see," Oh,there it is. "
[06:41.05]Or isn't. Or isn't.
[06:45.28]-Hello,Ross. -Susan.
[06:47.92]So?
[06:49.62]So did you hear?
[06:51.12]Yes,we did. Everything's A-Okay.
[06:53.42]Oh,that's so cool!
[06:57.30]It really is.
[06:59.03]Do we know?
[07:00.43]We certainly do. It's going to be a
[07:03.57]Hello? Hello?
[07:04.77]A guy who doesn't wanna know is standing here.
[07:09.67]Well,is it what we thought it would be?
[07:19.45]What? 什么?
[07:21.49]What did we think it'd be?
[07:24.16]I don't wanna know. Don't wanna know.
[07:29.19]-Well,thanks for the books. -No problem. Okay.
[07:42.57]Who should we call first? Your folks or Deb and Rhona?
[07:50.78]Hello?
[07:54.19]Never mind. I don 't wanna know.
[07:57.49]Because it was my table, I have to buy a new one?
[08:01.23]-That's the rule. -What rule? There's no rule. -
[08:05.30]-You owe me a table. -How did you get there? -
[08:09.00]It was fine until your breakfast adventure with Angela Delvecio.
[08:14.44]You knew about that?
[08:16.17]The impressions in the butter left little to the imagination.
[08:21.21]How about if we split it?
[08:24.08]-What do you mean,buy it together? -Yeah.
[08:27.62]-Do you think we' re ready for that? -Why not? -
[08:31.92]It's a big commitment. What if one of us wants to move out?
[08:36.09]-You' re moving out? -l' m not. -
[08:38.43]-You'd tell me if you were,right? -Yes. -
[08:41.00]-It's just,with my last roommate -I know all about Kip. -
[08:45.64]We bought a hibachi,then he ran off and got married. Things got ugly.
[08:50.94]Let me ask you something. Was Kip a better roommate than me?
[08:56.01]Oh,don't do that.
[09:03.79]There's changes in your schedule.
[09:06.12]Your 4:00 herbal massage is at 4:30.
[09:09.46]And Miss Summerfield canceled her 5:30 shiatsu.
[09:12.83]Thanks.
[09:14.40]Oh,here comes your 3:00.
[09:16.53]I don't mean to sound unprofessional, but Yum!
[09:24.34]Paolo! Hi! What are you doing here?
[09:29.35]Rachella tell me you...
[09:33.45]... massage? …
[09:34.92]Well,Rachella's right.
[09:43.53]I don't know what you just said, so let's start.
[09:48.27]I am...
[09:50.37]... being naked?
[09:52.80]That's your decision. Some people prefer to take off
[09:58.58]Being naked!
[10:01.18]I can't believe you don't wanna know. I couldn't not know.
[10:05.38]If the doctor knows, Carol and Susan know
[10:08.69]And Monica knows.
[10:11.46]How? I don't even know.
[10:13.32]Carol called to thank me for the lasagna. She told me.
[10:17.13]So what's it gonna be?
[10:22.10]-Oh,great! Now he knows. -l' m just excited about being an aunt. -
[10:26.80]Or an uncle.
[10:33.54]-Hey,Phoebe. -Hey,Pheebs.
[10:35.88]Fine!
[10:40.08]-What's the matter? -Nothing. I' m just out of sorts. -
[10:48.03]Can we get some cappuccino over here?
[10:52.20]Oh,right! That's me!
[10:55.43]That table place closes at 7. Come on.
[10:58.77]Fine.
[11:01.84]What is it?
[11:04.24]-All right. You know Paolo? -l' m familiar with his work.
[11:09.51]He made a move on me.
[11:11.42]-The store will be open tomorrow. -More coffee,please. -
[11:16.69]Well,what happened?
[11:18.46]He came in for a massage, and everything was fine until....
[11:26.73]-Oh,my God. -Are you sure?
[11:30.23]Oh,yeah. I' m sure.
[11:36.11]And all of a sudden,his hands weren't the problem anymore.
[11:44.52]Was it...?
[11:45.72]Boy Scouts could've camped under there.
[11:52.62]Wow.
[11:53.89]-What did you do? -I dealt with it like a professional. -
[12:04.00]" Ooh," what?
[12:05.80]ma Thurman.
[12:07.07]-The actress! -Uma Thurman! -
[12:10.44]Thanks,Rach.
[12:14.41]-What'll you do? -You have to tell her. -
[12:17.01]It's your moral obligation as a friend, as a woman. It's a feminist issue.
[12:21.89]Guys?
[12:23.22]-You have to. -Feminist issue? That's where I went. -
[12:28.66]-She is gonna hate me! -Yeah,well.... -
[12:38.94]Will you pick one? Just pick one.
[12:41.41]-Here,how about that one? -That's patio furniture. -
[12:45.94]So what? Like people will come in and think," Oh,l' m outside again. "
[12:50.55]Fine.
[12:52.22]What about the birds?
[12:55.09]I don't know. They don't say, " Hello,sit here. Eat something. "
[13:01.00]-You pick one. -Okay. How about the ladybugs? -
[13:04.40]Forget about the birds,but big red insects suggest fine dining.
[13:16.31]Kip would have liked the birds.
[13:29.42]-Hi,Pheebs. -What's going on?
[13:31.59]-Are you moving out? -l' m getting ready for the weekend. -
[13:40.36]These aren't all my suitcases.
[13:42.63]This one's Paolo's.
[13:47.37]-Rachel,can we talk for a sec? -Well,sure.
[13:51.48]Just for a sec,Paolo's on his way.
[14:06.22]We haven't known each other that long.
[14:09.13]There are three things you should know:
[14:12.06]One,my friends are the most important thing in my life.
[14:16.77]Two,I never lie.
[14:19.40]And three,I make the best oatmeal raisin cookies in the world.
[14:26.04]Okay. Thanks,Pheebs. ok,
[14:36.79]Why have I never tasted these?
[14:39.16]I don't make them a lot,because it's not fair to the other cookies.
[14:50.13]These are the best oatmeal raisin cookies.
[14:53.50]-Which proves that I never lie. -I guess you don't. -
[14:57.58]Paolo made a pass at me.
[15:02.35]What do you think?
[15:03.81]It's the most beautiful table I've seen.
[15:06.88]I know.
[15:08.29]Will you balance plates on these heads?
[15:11.32]Who cares? We'll eat at the sink. Come on!
[15:16.33]Heads up,Ross.
[15:18.03]Score! You suck!
[15:23.47]Are you okay?
[15:27.91]I need some mik.
[15:31.01]Okay. I've got milk. Ok,
[15:38.02]Here you go.
[15:48.00]Better?
[15:51.06]No.
[15:54.73]I feel so stupid! I think about the other day with you guys.
[16:00.27]And I was all," Oh,Paolo! He's so great!
[16:04.07]He makes me feel so"
[16:06.58]God!
[16:08.38]I' m so embarrassed!
[16:10.21]I' m so embarrassed.
[16:15.59]If I had never met him
[16:17.66]-l' m so sorry. -No,l' m sorry.
[16:20.00]-l' m sorry. -l' m sorry. Wait. -
[16:22.56]-What are we sorry about? -I don't know.
[16:25.33]Right. He's the pig. Right. He's the pig.
[16:27.53]-Such a pig! -Oh,God,he's such a pig!
[16:30.50]He's like a big disgusting pig....
[16:34.24]-Pig man! -Yes,good!
[16:40.74]But he was my pig man!
[16:45.05]How did I not see this?
[16:48.79]Oh,I know!
[16:53.02]Because...
[16:55.06]... he's gorgeous.
[16:56.83]And he's charming.
[16:58.63]-And when he looks -Okay,Pheebs.
[17:01.53]The end.
[17:05.44]God.
[17:08.47]Should I not have told you?
[17:11.31]T rust me,it's much better that I know.
[17:17.88]But I just liked it better before. It was better.
[17:38.64]She took it pretty well. Paolo's over there now,so....
[17:48.71]-Score! -Game! Nice!
[17:53.32]Come on,Pheebs.
[17:56.15]Well,it looks like we kicked your butts.
[17:59.32]She did. You could be on the Olympic "Standing There" team.
[18:03.69]Come on. Two on one.
[18:05.33]Why are you here? She just broke up with him.
[18:08.17]It's time for you to swoop in.
[18:11.10]-What,now? -Yes. Now is when you swoop.
[18:14.07]When Paolo walks out, you gotta be the first guy she sees.
[18:18.18]She's gotta know you' re everything he's not. You' re the anti-Paolo.
[18:24.65]My Catholic friend is right.
[18:26.78]She's distraught. You' re there for her.
[18:29.59]You pick up the pieces and then you usher in "The Age of Ross. "
[18:42.27]-See this? See? -Hold it! Ascolta!
[18:48.27]-How's it going? -Don't stare. -
[18:50.37]She threw his clothes off the balcony. Now there's gesturing and arm-waving.
[18:55.55]That is," How could you? " or " Enormous breasts! "
[19:01.15]Here he comes.
[19:13.30]I am...
[19:15.30]...to say goodbye.
[19:17.27]Okay,bye-bye.
[19:22.24]Paolo,I really hate you for what you did,but I still have five of these...
[19:27.78]...so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles.
[19:35.42]I just wanna tell you,and I think I'd speak for everyone when I say....
[19:46.86]Oh,just look at her.
[19:49.07]Guys,I think only one of us should go...
[19:51.80]-...so she's not overwhelmed. -Right. -
[19:54.34]And I really think it should be me.
[20:13.56]You all right?
[20:15.93]I've been better.
[20:19.20]I don't believe this.
[20:21.77]I wasn't supposed to care about this guy.
[20:25.04]It was just supposed to be this big,fun,ltalian thing.
[20:30.47]Someday I could look back and say, "That was a big,fun,ltalian thing. "
[20:36.85]It wasn't supposed to feel like this when it was over.
[20:51.36]Listen...
[20:53.06]...you deserve so much better than him.
[20:56.33]I mean,you...
[20:58.67]...should be with a guy who knows what he has when he has you.
[21:06.54]What?
[21:08.51]I' m so sick of guys!
[21:11.92]I don't want to look at or think about another guy.
[21:16.79]I don't even want to be near another guy.
[21:26.93]Ross,you' re so great.
[21:41.01]-Are you all right? -Are you okay?
[21:43.68]-Medium. Any cookies left? -Yeah.
[21:50.55]See,Rach...
[21:52.09]... I don't think swearing off guys altogether is the answer.
[21:56.69]What you need is to develop a more sophisticated screening process.
[22:03.03]I just need to be by myself for a while.
[22:05.94]-I just gotta figure out what I want. -No,no. -
[22:10.34]See,because not all guys out there are gonna be a Paolo.
[22:14.51]No,I know. I know.
[22:16.65]And l' m sure your little boy's not gonna grow up to be one.
[22:21.72]-What? -What?
[22:26.46]I' m having a boy?
[22:28.76]No.
[22:31.03]No. In fact,you' re not having a boy.
[22:35.10]I' m having a boy.
[22:38.47]-Huh? Am I having a boy? -You' re having a boy! -
[22:42.67]I' m having a boy!
[22:44.11]-l' m having a boy! -What is it?
[22:46.38]I' m having a boy! I' m having a boy!
[22:52.75]We already knew that!
[22:57.72]I' m having a son.
[23:07.60]Yes! And that would be a shutdown!
[23:10.53]Shutout!
[23:15.24]Where you going? One more game!
[23:18.04]-It's 2:30 in the morning. -Yeah,get out!
[23:21.75]You guys always hang out in my apartment.
[23:27.62]Come on,wussies!
[23:33.46]All right! Okay! I gotta go!
[23:36.19]I' m going.
[23:37.79]And l' m gone.
[23:42.07]-One more game? -Oh,yeah.