The Bed Song Lyrics
| Song | The Bed Song |
| Artist | Amanda Palmer |
| Album | Theatre Is Evil |
| Download | Image LRC TXT |
| Exhibit A | |
| We are friends in a sleeping bag splitting the heat | |
| We have one filthy pillow to share and your lips are in my hair | |
| Someone upstairs has a rat that we laughed at | |
| And people are drinking | |
| And singing | |
| Van Halen and | |
| Slayer on a ukulele tear | |
| Exhibit B | |
| Well, we found an apartment | |
| It’s not much to look at | |
| A futon on a floor | |
| Torn-off desktop for a door | |
| All the decor's made of milk crates and duct tape | |
| And if we have sex | |
| They can hear us through the floor | |
| But we don’t do that anymore | |
| And I lay there wondering, what is the matter? | |
| Is this a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You took the blanket, so | |
| I took the bedsheet | |
| But I would have held you if you'd only | |
| Let me Exhibit | |
| C Look how quaint | |
| And how quiet and private | |
| Our paychecks have bought us a condo in town | |
| It's the nicest flat around | |
| You picked a mattress and had it delivered | |
| And I walked upstairs | |
| And the sight of it made my heart pound | |
| And I wrapped my arms around me | |
| And I stood there wondering, what is the matter? | |
| Is this a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You walked right past me and straightened the covers | |
| But I would still love you if you wanted a lover | |
| And you said | |
| All the money in the world | |
| Won't buy a bed so big and wide | |
| To guarantee that you won't accidentally touch me | |
| In the night | |
| Exhibit D | |
| Now we're both mostly paralyzed | |
| Don't know how long we've been lying here in fear | |
| Too afraid to even feel | |
| I find my glasses and you turn the light out | |
| Roll off on your side | |
| Like you've rolled away for years | |
| Holding back those king-size tears | |
| And I still don't ask you, what is the matter? | |
| Is this a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You take the heart failure | |
| I'll take the cancer | |
| I've long stopped wondering why you don't answer | |
| Exhibit E | |
| You can certainly see how fulfilling a life | |
| From the cost and size of stone of our final resting home | |
| We got some nice ones right under a cherry tree | |
| You and me lying the only way we know | |
| Side by side and still and cold | |
| And I finally ask you, what was the matter? | |
| Was it a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You stretch your arms out and finally face me | |
| You say I would have told you | |
| If you'd only asked me | |
| If you'd only asked me | |
| If you'd only asked me |
| Exhibit A | |
| We are friends in a sleeping bag splitting the heat | |
| We have one filthy pillow to share and your lips are in my hair | |
| Someone upstairs has a rat that we laughed at | |
| And people are drinking | |
| And singing | |
| Van Halen and | |
| Slayer on a ukulele tear | |
| Exhibit B | |
| Well, we found an apartment | |
| It' s not much to look at | |
| A futon on a floor | |
| Tornoff desktop for a door | |
| All the decor' s made of milk crates and duct tape | |
| And if we have sex | |
| They can hear us through the floor | |
| But we don' t do that anymore | |
| And I lay there wondering, what is the matter? | |
| Is this a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You took the blanket, so | |
| I took the bedsheet | |
| But I would have held you if you' d only | |
| Let me Exhibit | |
| C Look how quaint | |
| And how quiet and private | |
| Our paychecks have bought us a condo in town | |
| It' s the nicest flat around | |
| You picked a mattress and had it delivered | |
| And I walked upstairs | |
| And the sight of it made my heart pound | |
| And I wrapped my arms around me | |
| And I stood there wondering, what is the matter? | |
| Is this a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You walked right past me and straightened the covers | |
| But I would still love you if you wanted a lover | |
| And you said | |
| All the money in the world | |
| Won' t buy a bed so big and wide | |
| To guarantee that you won' t accidentally touch me | |
| In the night | |
| Exhibit D | |
| Now we' re both mostly paralyzed | |
| Don' t know how long we' ve been lying here in fear | |
| Too afraid to even feel | |
| I find my glasses and you turn the light out | |
| Roll off on your side | |
| Like you' ve rolled away for years | |
| Holding back those kingsize tears | |
| And I still don' t ask you, what is the matter? | |
| Is this a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You take the heart failure | |
| I' ll take the cancer | |
| I' ve long stopped wondering why you don' t answer | |
| Exhibit E | |
| You can certainly see how fulfilling a life | |
| From the cost and size of stone of our final resting home | |
| We got some nice ones right under a cherry tree | |
| You and me lying the only way we know | |
| Side by side and still and cold | |
| And I finally ask you, what was the matter? | |
| Was it a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You stretch your arms out and finally face me | |
| You say I would have told you | |
| If you' d only asked me | |
| If you' d only asked me | |
| If you' d only asked me |
| Exhibit A | |
| We are friends in a sleeping bag splitting the heat | |
| We have one filthy pillow to share and your lips are in my hair | |
| Someone upstairs has a rat that we laughed at | |
| And people are drinking | |
| And singing | |
| Van Halen and | |
| Slayer on a ukulele tear | |
| Exhibit B | |
| Well, we found an apartment | |
| It' s not much to look at | |
| A futon on a floor | |
| Tornoff desktop for a door | |
| All the decor' s made of milk crates and duct tape | |
| And if we have sex | |
| They can hear us through the floor | |
| But we don' t do that anymore | |
| And I lay there wondering, what is the matter? | |
| Is this a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You took the blanket, so | |
| I took the bedsheet | |
| But I would have held you if you' d only | |
| Let me Exhibit | |
| C Look how quaint | |
| And how quiet and private | |
| Our paychecks have bought us a condo in town | |
| It' s the nicest flat around | |
| You picked a mattress and had it delivered | |
| And I walked upstairs | |
| And the sight of it made my heart pound | |
| And I wrapped my arms around me | |
| And I stood there wondering, what is the matter? | |
| Is this a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You walked right past me and straightened the covers | |
| But I would still love you if you wanted a lover | |
| And you said | |
| All the money in the world | |
| Won' t buy a bed so big and wide | |
| To guarantee that you won' t accidentally touch me | |
| In the night | |
| Exhibit D | |
| Now we' re both mostly paralyzed | |
| Don' t know how long we' ve been lying here in fear | |
| Too afraid to even feel | |
| I find my glasses and you turn the light out | |
| Roll off on your side | |
| Like you' ve rolled away for years | |
| Holding back those kingsize tears | |
| And I still don' t ask you, what is the matter? | |
| Is this a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You take the heart failure | |
| I' ll take the cancer | |
| I' ve long stopped wondering why you don' t answer | |
| Exhibit E | |
| You can certainly see how fulfilling a life | |
| From the cost and size of stone of our final resting home | |
| We got some nice ones right under a cherry tree | |
| You and me lying the only way we know | |
| Side by side and still and cold | |
| And I finally ask you, what was the matter? | |
| Was it a matter of worse or of better? | |
| You stretch your arms out and finally face me | |
| You say I would have told you | |
| If you' d only asked me | |
| If you' d only asked me | |
| If you' d only asked me |
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