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I used to be a sinner used to have my cake and eat it |
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They warned me of my fate but I was quite prepared |
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To meet it |
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You'll go to Hell they smiled at me |
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And told me of the roaring fires |
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But I was happy living wild |
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And fuelling my own desires |
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I was a wild man |
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Drinking, smoking and messing around with women |
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Lots of women |
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No, not swimming, women |
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I wanna go to Heaven |
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The place to be is right up there |
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I wanna go to Heaven |
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It's gonna be good so I won't despair |
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I decided to reform and pray |
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Beg mercy for my soul |
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I prayed in Church |
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Threw away my bad habits |
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Prayed out of Church |
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Adopted an entirely different role |
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I gave money to the poor |
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Until I was poor |
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But at least I ensured |
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That I would go up there |
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Instead of down below |
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To the inferno |
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Where the evil flames of desire |
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Burned higher and higher and higher |
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I'm gonna go to Heaven |
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Paid my dues so I'm getting in |
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I'm gonna go to Heaven |
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It's looking good if I abstain from sin |
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I knocked on the pearly gates |
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Neatly side-stepping the long queue |
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Waved hi to St. Peter |
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Who checked my card and let me through |
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I smiled |
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Threw my hands in the air |
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Laughed |
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And got arrested |
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The said 'hey man, you're in the wrong place |
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You behaviour is a disgrace |
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Here we pray every hour |
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On the hour |
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Read extracts from the Bible |
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And look solemn' |
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What says I, no party |
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No party |
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Let me out |
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Let me out of Heaven |
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I got it wrong no I can't stay here |
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No laughing in Heaven |
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Let me out, I just can't stay here |
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Well I ran around in a state of shock and panic |
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This wasn't what I expected |
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Here was what looked like a bunch of manic-depressives |
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Can I get a transfer I screamed |
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But no |
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Once you're in Heaven, you're here for good |
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The good of your soul |
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But that's no good to me |
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If you want to go to Hell |
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you've really got to be bad |
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Okay okay, I'll be bad, I'll be bad |
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Too late |
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What do you mean too late |
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Too late |
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No |
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In the meantime |
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Let me out of Heaven |
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I've got it wrong, no I can't stay here |
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No laughing in Heaven |
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Oh god it's awful here |
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Going crazy in Heaven |
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Take me out let me go to Hell |
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No laughing in Heaven |
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Don't laugh this place is Hell. |
