For What Is Chatteris... Lyrics

	One way system – smooth and commendable
	Go by bus – they’re highly dependable
	The swings in the park for the kids have won awards
	The clean streets acknowledged in the Lords
	But what’s a park if you can’t see a linnet?
	A timetable if your journey’s infinite?
	My bag’s packed and I’m leaving in a minute
	For what is Chatteris without you in it?
	Car crime’s low, the gun crime’s lower
	The town hall band CD, it’s a grower
	You never hear of folk getting knocked on the bonce
	Although there was a drive-by shouting once
	But there’s a brass band everywhere
	And I don’t drive, so I don’t care
	And as a nightingale sang in Berkeley Square
	What’s Chatteris if you’re not there?
	Like a game-bird reserve short on pheasants
	Weavers’ cottages devoid of tenants
	A market town that lacks quintessence
	That’s Chatteris without your presence
	Three good butchers, two fine chandlers
	An indoor pool and a first class cake shop
	Ofsted plaudits, envy of the Fens
	Prick barriers at both ends
	But what’s Chatteris if you’re not there?
	What’s Chatteris if you’re not there?
	What’s Chatteris if you’re not there?
	What’s Chatteris if you’re not there?
	What’s Chatteris if you’re not there?
	What’s Chatteris if you’re not there?
	I may as well be in Ely or St.Ives…

	One way system smooth and commendable
	Go by bus they' re highly dependable
	The swings in the park for the kids have won awards
	The clean streets acknowledged in the Lords
	But what' s a park if you can' t see a linnet?
	A timetable if your journey' s infinite?
	My bag' s packed and I' m leaving in a minute
	For what is Chatteris without you in it?
	Car crime' s low, the gun crime' s lower
	The town hall band CD, it' s a grower
	You never hear of folk getting knocked on the bonce
	Although there was a driveby shouting once
	But there' s a brass band everywhere
	And I don' t drive, so I don' t care
	And as a nightingale sang in Berkeley Square
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	Like a gamebird reserve short on pheasants
	Weavers' cottages devoid of tenants
	A market town that lacks quintessence
	That' s Chatteris without your presence
	Three good butchers, two fine chandlers
	An indoor pool and a first class cake shop
	Ofsted plaudits, envy of the Fens
	Prick barriers at both ends
	But what' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	I may as well be in Ely or St. Ives

	One way system smooth and commendable
	Go by bus they' re highly dependable
	The swings in the park for the kids have won awards
	The clean streets acknowledged in the Lords
	But what' s a park if you can' t see a linnet?
	A timetable if your journey' s infinite?
	My bag' s packed and I' m leaving in a minute
	For what is Chatteris without you in it?
	Car crime' s low, the gun crime' s lower
	The town hall band CD, it' s a grower
	You never hear of folk getting knocked on the bonce
	Although there was a driveby shouting once
	But there' s a brass band everywhere
	And I don' t drive, so I don' t care
	And as a nightingale sang in Berkeley Square
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	Like a gamebird reserve short on pheasants
	Weavers' cottages devoid of tenants
	A market town that lacks quintessence
	That' s Chatteris without your presence
	Three good butchers, two fine chandlers
	An indoor pool and a first class cake shop
	Ofsted plaudits, envy of the Fens
	Prick barriers at both ends
	But what' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	What' s Chatteris if you' re not there?
	I may as well be in Ely or St. Ives

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