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Stuart |
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My name it is Matthews, and I've got it made |
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A memorial maker - it's a profitable trade |
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I don't solicit business; there's no point in trying |
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What I like about my customers - they just keep on dying |
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Here lies Frederick, mourned by his wife |
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He lead a blameless life |
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He couldn't win the way she treated him |
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His gravestone should have read |
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Here lies Fred - he's better off dead |
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Rest in peace, rest in peace |
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My name it is Matthews, and I've got it made |
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A memorial maker - it's a profitable trade |
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They bring the names of husbands, they bring the names of wives |
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They want me to perpetuate their awful, dreary lives |
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Here lies John, run over by a bus |
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He was loved by all of us |
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His time on earth, what was it worth |
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When all is said and done? |
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Here lies John - we're rather glad he's gone. |
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Rest in peace, rest in peace |
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They come to me and spend all they've got |
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'Cause it costs quite a lot to be remembered |
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They think it is the only way |
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What would the neighbors say anyway? |
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It's so prestigious, even though you're not religious |
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Maybe one day I will carve a stone |
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Big enough for everyone |
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And written there for those who care |
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In letters ten feet high: |
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"Here they lie who were born to die" |
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Rest in peace, rest in peace |
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Rest in peace, rest in peace now my friend, it's the end |
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Rest in peace, rest in peace now my friend, it's the end |
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My name it is Matthews, and I've got it made |
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A memorial maker - it's a profitable trade |