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And for him to feel good about himself, he must achieve these goals alone, by himself. To offer a man unsolicited advice is to presume that he doesn' t know what to do or that he can' t do it on his own. Men are very touchy about this, because the issue of competence is so very important to them. However, if the man truly does need help, then it' s a sign of wisdom to get it. In this case, he' ll find someone he respects and then talk about his problem. Talking about a problem on Mars is an invitation for advice. Another Martian feels honored by the opportunity. Automatically, he puts on his Mr. Fixit hat, listens for a few beats, and then offers some advice. This Martian custom is one of the reasons men instinctively offer solutions when a woman talks about her feelings or about her problems. |
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ér nán rén yào xiǎng zì wǒ gǎn jué bù cuò, jiù bì xū shì tā zì jǐ dú lì dá dào zhèi xiē mù biāo cái xíng. zài nán rén kàn lái, bù qǐng zì lái de jiàn yì jiù shì rèn wéi tā men bù zhī dào gāi zuò shí mǒ huò shì bù néng píng gè rén de lì liàng huò qǔ shèng lì. tā men duì cǐ hěn nǎo huǒ, yīn wèi gè rén néng lì duì yú tā men fēi cháng zhòng yào. rán ér, rú guǒ nán rén què dìng xū yào bāng zhù, qǔ de bāng zhù yě shì míng zhì zhī jǔ. zài zhè zhǒng qíng kuàng xià, tā huì hé yī wèi zì jǐ jìng zhòng de rén tán lùn zì jǐ de kùn nán. nán rén zhī jiān tán lùn kùn nán jiù shì qǐng qiú tā rén tí gōng yì jiàn. bèi qǐng qiú de rén yīn cǐ huì pō gǎn róng xìng, bìng shùn qí zì rán dì shū fā gǎn xiǎng, tīng duì fāng sù shuō, rán hòu tí chū bǎo guì de jiàn yì. nán rén de zhè zhǒng xí guàn zài yí dìng chéng dù shàng dǎo zhì le tā men zài nǚ rén tán lùn zì jǐ de qíng gǎn hé kùn huò shí, běn néng dì tí gōng jiě jué fāng àn. |