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Joey: Excuse me, Miss. Hello, Miss? |
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nǚ shì zài na r, bào qiàn, xiǎo jiě děng děng |
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Ursula spins around looking puzzled, quite unable to tell where the sound is coming from. |
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Chandler: It' s Phoebe! Hi! shì fēi bǐ! |
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Ursula notices Joey waving his hand, and comes over. |
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Ursula: Hi. Okay, will that be all? |
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hǎo de, zhèi xiē jiù shì quán bù la? |
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Chandler: Wait, wait! Whwhat are you doing here? |
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děng děng, nǐ lái zhè ér gàn shén me? |
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Ursula: Yeah, um, I was over there, then you said, " Excuse me, hello Miss," so now I' m here. |
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wǒ běn lái zài na r, rán hòu nǐ jiào " hāi, xiǎo jiě." suǒ yǐ wǒ jiù guò lái le |
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Joey: No, no... how come you are working here? |
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bù, nǐ zěn me huì zài zhè ér gōng zuò? |
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Ursula: Right, yeah, ' cause its close to where I live, and the aprons are really cute. |
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yīn wèi zhè ér lí wǒ de zhù chù hěn jìn, ér qiě wéi qún yě hěn piào liàng |
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Chandler: Can we start over? kě yǐ chóng lái ma? |
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Ursula: Yeah. Okay great. I' m gonna be over here. She wanders away. hǎo de, wǒ dào nà biān qù |
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Chandler Joey: No, no, no! |
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Opening Credits |
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Scene: A wintry February day in New York City, snowplows are clearing the streets. Inside Central Perk, all three girls are paying court to Ross. |
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Ross: I don' t know whether he' s testing me, or just acting out, but my monkey is out of control. But, he keeps erasing the messages on my machine, " supposedly" by accident. |
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wǒ bù zhī dào tā shì bú shì zài kǎo yàn wǒ, wǒ de hóu zi yǐ shī qù kòng zhì, tā bù duàn qīng chú wǒ dá lù jī shàng de liú yán, yīng gāi shì gè yì wài. |
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Rachel: No, yeah, I' ve done that. ó, shì de, wǒ zuò guò zhè zhǒng shì |
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Ross: And then, like three days in a row he got to the newspaper before I did, and peed all over the cRossword. |
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tā lián xù sān tiān zài wǒ kàn bào zhǐ qián, zài cāi zì yóu xì shàng niào niào |
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Rachel: I' ve never done that. zhè wǒ méi zuò guò |
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Outside in the street, Joey and Chandler arrive, to peer through the window at Phoebe, by bending down to look underneath the shop' s sign a large steaming cup of coffee. |
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Chandler: All right, now look at her and tell me she doesn' t look exactly like her sister. |
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tā kàn qǐ lái hé tā jiě jie wán quán yí yàng |
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Joey: I' m sayin' I see a difference. wǒ kàn dào bù tóng zhī chù |
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Chandler: They' re twins! tā men shì shuāng bāo tāi |
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Joey: I don' t care. Phoebe' s Phoebe. Ursula' s... hot! |
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wǒ bù guǎn, fēi bǐ shì fēi bǐ, wū sū lā hěn huǒ là |
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Joey and Chandler come indoors. |
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Chandler: You know that thing, when you and I talk to each other about things? |
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nǐ zhī dào wǒ men zěn me shuō zhè zhǒng shì qíng? |
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Joey: Yeah. |
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Chandler: Let' s not do that any more. |
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bié zài tán lùn nà shì le |
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They hang up their coats and scarves, then approach their friends on the main sofa. |
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All: Hey guys! Hey! |
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Joey: Hey Pheebs, guess who we saw today. |
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fēi bǐ, cāi wǒ men jīn tiān yù jiàn shuí? |
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Phoebe: Ooh, ooh, fun! Okay... um, Liam Neeson. |
|
ó, hǎo wán de shì qíng! hǎo de, lián ēn ní xùn |
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Joey: Nope. |
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Phoebe: Morly Safer. mò lì. sāi fú |
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Joey: Nope. bú shì |
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Phoebe: The woman who cuts my hair! |
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jiǎn wǒ tóu fà de nǚ rén! |
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Monica: Okay, look, this could be a really long game. |
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zhè huì shì yí gè hěn zhǎng de yóu xì |
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Chandler: Your sister Ursula. nǐ jiě jie, wū sū lā |
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Phoebe: Her face dropping Oh, really. ó, zhēn de? |
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Chandler: Yeah, yeah, she works over at that place, uh... |
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tā zài na r gōng zuò |
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Phoebe: Rift' s. Yeah, I know. |
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ruì fēi cān tīng, wǒ zhī dào |
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Chandler: Oh, you do? Because she said you guys haven' t talked in like years. |
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nǐ zhī dào? yīn wèi tā shuō nǐ men yǐ duō nián bù shuō huà |
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Phoebe: Hmmm? Yeah. So, um, is she fat? |
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duì, tā pàng ma? |
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Joey: Not from where I was standin'. |
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cóng wǒ de jiǎo dù kàn bú huì |
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Phoebe: Turning to Chandler where were you standing? |
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nǐ cóng shén me jiǎo dù? |
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Rachel: Um, Pheebs, so, you guys just don' t get along? |
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fēi bǐ, nǐ men hé bù lái? |
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Phoebe: It' s mostly just dumb sister stuff, you know, I mean, like, everyone always thought of her as the pretty one, you know... Oh, oh, she was the first one to start walking, even though I did it... later that same day. But, to my parents, by then it was like " yeah, right, well what else is new?" |
|
zhè zhǐ shì jiě mèi zhī jiān de shì, dà jiā dōu rèn wéi tā piào liàng, tā xiān xué huì zǒu lù suī rán wǒ shì zài dàng tiān shāo hòu xué huì de, duì wǒ bà mā ér yán nà, jiù yǐ jīng bù xīn xiān le, |
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Ross: Oh, Pheebs, I' m sorry, I' ve got to go. I' ve got Lamaze class. |
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fēi bǐ, bào qiàn, wǒ dé zǒu le wǒ dé qù cān jiā xīn lǐ zhù chǎn bān. |
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Chandler: Oh, and I' ve got Earth Science, but I' ll catch you in Gym. |
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wǒ dé qù cān jiā dì qiú kē xué bān jiàn shēn fáng jiàn le |
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Rachel: So, is this just gonna be you and Carol? |
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jiù nǐ hé kǎ luó liǎng rén qù? |
|
Ross: No, Susan' s gonna be there too. We' ve got dads, we' ve got lesbians, the whole parenting team. |
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bù, sū shān yě yào qù, nà yǒu bà bà, nǚ tóng zhì quán bù de fù mǔ dōu huì dào |
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Rachel: Well, isn' t, isn' t that gonna be weird? |
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zhè yàng bú shì huì hěn qí guài? |
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Ross: No, no. Distractedly putting on a jacket to go out I mean, it mighta been at first, but by now I, I think I' m pretty comfortable with the whole situation. |
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bú huì de, yī kāi shǐ huò xǔ huì. xiàn zài wǒ yǐ tǎn rán miàn duì |
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Monica: Ross, that' s my jacket. luó sī, nà shi wǒ de wài tào |
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Ross: I know. wǒ zhī dào |
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Rachel grins as Ross removes the girlie jacket, grabs his own, and rushes out. |
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Scene: The Lamaze class, several couples and one trio sit on the floor, introducing themselves to the teacher, who' s got as far as a woman sitting next to Ross, Carol, and Susan. |
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Woman: Hi, we' re the Rostins. Err, I' m J. C., and he' s Michael, and we' re having a boy, and a girl. |
|
wǒ men xìng luó, wǒ shì jié xī tā jiào mài kě. wǒ men yǒu yí gè nán hái hé yí gè nǚ hái |
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Teacher: Good for you. Alrighty, next? lì hài, xià yī wèi |
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Ross: Hi, um, I' m err, has to clear his throat I' m Ross Geller, and err ah... pats Carol' s bulge .. that' s, that' s my boy in there, and uh, points this is Carol Willick, and this... is Susan Bunch. Susan is um Carol' s, just, com... embarrassment finally overwhelms the poor fellow, who becomes incoherent until .. who' s next? |
|
wǒ jiào luó sī, wǒ ér zi zài na r, tā jiào kǎ luó, zhè wèi shì sū shān, sū shān shì kǎ luó de xià yī wèi shì shuí? |
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Teacher: I' m sorry, I didn' t get... Susan is? bào qiàn, sū shān shì |
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Ross: Susan is Carol' s, Carol' s, Carol' s, friend... |
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sū shān shì kǎ luó de péng yǒu, Carol: Life partner. shēng huó pāi dàng |
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Ross: Like buddies. jiù xiàng huǒ bàn, |
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Susan: Like lovers. hǎo xiàng liàn rén |
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Ross: You know how close women can get. nǐ zhī dào nǚ rén néng yǒu duō qīn jìn de |
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The teacher smiles, but her eyebrows go up. Susan and Carol pat each other affectionately. |
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Carol: Susan and I live together. wǒ men liǎ zhù zài yì qǐ, |
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Ross: Although I was married to her. wǒ liǎ céng jīng jié guò hūn |
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Susan: Carol, not me. kǎ luó, bú shì wǒ |
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Ross: Err, right. |
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Carol: It' s a little complicated. yǒu diǎn fù zá le |
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Ross: A little. |
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Susan: But we' re fine. dàn shì wǒ men bù cuò |
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Ross: Absolutely. Turns back to the woman next to him. So, twins... hah! That' s like two births. He struggles again. Ouch. |
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jué duì de! shuāng bāo tāi, hǎo xiàng yào shēng liǎng cì |
|
Scene : Chandler' s Office, Chandler is working. |
|
Helen' s buzzer is heard on the intercom, so Chandler presses his button, too. |
|
Chandler: And he imitates the buzzer to you too, Helen. |
|
bǐ cǐ, hǎi lún |
|
Helen: Over the intercom Nina Bookbinder is here to see you. |
|
nī nà. bù kè bīn dé lái zhǎo nǐ |
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Chandler: Oh, okay. Send her in. hǎo de, ràng tā jìn lái |
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He hurriedly checks his hair in his computer screen, before taking a sporting trophy from a drawer to place ostentatiously on his desk. An attractive young woman opens the door. |
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Nina: Hi. |
|
Chandler: Hi, Nina. Come on in. nī nà, kuài jìn lái |
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Nina: You wanted to see me? nǐ xiǎng jiàn wǒ? |
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Chandler: Uh, Yes. Yes. I' ve just been going over your data here, and little thing, you' ve been postdating your Friday numbers. |
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wǒ gāng kàn guò nǐ de zī liào nǐ yī zhí tián chí nǐ zhōu wǔ shù zì de rì qī |
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Nina: Which is bad, because? zhè yàng hěn bù hǎo, yīn wèi |
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Chandler: Well, it throws my WENUS out of whack. |
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zhè yàng shǐ wǒ de WEENUS chū xiàn wèn tí |
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Nina: Your... excuse me? duì bù qǐ? |
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Chandler: WENUS. Coughs Weekly Estimated Net... |
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měi zhōu gū jì jìng zhí shǐ yòng tǒng jì |
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Nina: Oh, Net Usage Statistics, right. Gotcha, gotcha. Won' t happen again. I wouldn' t want to do anything to hurt your... " wenus." |
|
měi zhōu gū jì jìng zhí shǐ yòng tǒng jì, bú huì zài fā shēng le wǒ bú huì zuò rèn hé shì shāng hài nǐ de wéi nà sī WEENUS |
|
Nina beams flirtatiously at Chandler, who catches her drift, but for once he' s lost for something to say so she nods her head to tell him that he' s thinking correctly... |
|
Scene: Monica and Rachel' s, Ross, Chandler, and the girls are dividing some Chinese takeout, while the sitcom Family Matters is playing on the TV. |
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Chandler: It' s not just that she' s cute, okay. It' s just that... she' s really really cute. |
|
zhè bú shì tā piào bù piào liàng de wèn tí, zhè shì tā zhēn de hěn piào liàng |
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Ross: It doesn' t matter. You don' t dip your pen in the company ink. |
|
dōu yí yàng, tù zi bù chī wō biān cǎo |
|
Marcel scampers about, interfering with the neatness. |
|
Monica: Ross, your little creature' s got the remote again. |
|
luó sī nǐ de xiǎo dòng wù yòu zài wán yáo kòng qì |
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Ross: Marcel, Marcel, give Rossie the remote. Marcel. Marcel, you give Rossie the remote right now... Marce... you give Rossie the remote... |
|
mǎ xiū, bǎ yáo kòng qì gěi luó sī. mǎ xiū, xiàn zài mǎ shàng bǎ yáo kòng qì gěi luó sī, bǎ yáo kòng qì gěi luó sī |
|
Marcel points the remote at Monica' s television, pressing a particular combination of keys. The logo SAP appears on the screen, and suddenly the dialogue is dubbed into Spanish. |
|
Monica: Great. zhè xià hǎo le |
|
Ross: Relax, I' ll fix it. fàng xīn. wǒ huì xiū hǎo de |
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Rachel: Looking at the television Cool... " Urkel" in Spanish is " Urkel." |
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kù zài xī bān yá wén zhōng jiào" wū kù" |
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Ross: looking at the remote How did he do this? tā shì zěn me bàn dào de? |
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Chandler: Looking out at the balcony So tell me something, is leaving the Christmas lights up part of your plan to keep us merry all year long? |
|
nǐ ràng shèng dàn dēng kāi shì xiǎng ràng wǒ men" kuài lè" yī zhěng nián? |
|
Rachel slowly spins around, finally noticing that the lights have outstayed their welcome. |
|
Monica: Ah no, you see, someone was supposed to take them down around New Year' s... but obviously someone forgot. |
|
bù, mǒu rén zài xīn nián qī jiān jiù yīng gāi bǎ tā ná xià tā xiǎn rán shì wàng le |
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Rachel: Well, someone was supposed to write " Rach, take down the lights" and put it on the re... frigerate... finally noticing Monica' s note stuck to the refrigerator How long has that been there? |
|
mǒu rén yīng gāi xiě gè zì tiáo" ruì qiū, ná xià shèng dàn dēng" rán hòu tiē zài bīng zài zhè ér duō jiǔ le? |
|
Joey enters, looking extremely pleased with himself. |
|
Chandler: Hey, where you been? nǐ shàng nǎ ér qù le? |
|
Joey: I went back to Riff' s. I think Ursula likes me. All I ordered was coffee, she brought me a tuna melt and four plates of curly fries. |
|
ruì fú cān tīng, wǒ xiǎng wū sū lā xǐ huān wǒ wǒ zhǐ diǎn kā fēi, tā què duān gěi wǒ wěi yú hé sì pán de shǔ piàn |
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Chandler: Score. yǒu mén le |
|
Joey: She is so hot! tā hǎo dài jìn r |
|
Chandler: Yeah, listen. Okay, before you do anything Joeylike, you might wanna run it by err... he indicates Phoebe, who is helping Ross understand the remote control. |
|
nǐ zhǎn kāi" qiáo yī" xíng dòng zhī qián, huò xǔ nǐ kě yǐ zhǎo |
|
Joey: Pheebs? fēi bǐ? |
|
Phoebe: Jumping up Yeah? dāng rán |
|
Joey: You think it would be okay if I asked out your sister? |
|
fēi bǐ, wǒ yuē nǐ jiě chū qù nǐ huì jiè yì ma? |
|
Phoebe: Why? Why would you wanna... do that? Why? |
|
wèi shí me? nǐ wèi hé yào nà yàng zuò? wèi shí me? |
|
Joey: So that if we went out on a date, she' d be there. |
|
yīn wèi rú guǒ wǒ qù yuē huì shí, tā jiù huì zài wǒ shēn biān |
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Phoebe: Well, I mean, I' m not my sister' s, you know, whatever, and um... I mean, it' s true, we were one egg, once, but err, you know, we' ve grown apart, so, um... I don' t know, why not? Okay. |
|
hǎo ba, bù guǎn zěn yàng, wǒ bú shì tā. méi cuò, wǒ men què shí céng dài zài tóng yī kē , dàn wǒ men gè zì fā yù, wǒ bù zhī dào yǒu hé bù kě? |
|
Joey: Cool, thanks. kù. xiè la |
|
He happily gestures at Chandler that there was nothing to worry about, then exits. Rachel and Monica are concerned for poor Phoebe, who slides back down next to Ross. |
|
Ross: You okay? nǐ hái hǎo ba? |
|
Phoebe: Yeah I' m fine. hái hǎo |
|
Ross: You wanna watch Laverne y Shirley? nǐ hái yào jì xù kàn? |
|
The sitcom begins with its familiar refrain, yet with a Latin lilt. Rachel and Monica do a little dance with their chopsticks, and Phoebe has to grin as Ross joins in the rhythm. |
|
Scene: Lamaze class. Susan is there. Each couple has a doll, for they have just finished learning how to change a diaper. As Ross rushes in, stepping on the Rostins' pretend baby, squashing its head flat. It bleats, in protest. He performs emergency surgery, then hands the doll back to J. C. |
|
Ross: Sorry. |
|
Ross: Hi. Sorry I' m late. Where' s, where' s Carol? |
|
bào qiàn, wǒ chí dào le. kǎ luó zài nǎ ér? |
|
Susan: Stuck at school. Some parentteacher thing. You can go. I' ll get the information. |
|
xué xiào yǒu shì, lǎo shī hé jiā zhǎng jiān de shì, nǐ kě yǐ zǒu le, wǒ liú xià lái shàng kè |
|
Ross: No... No... No. I think I should stay, I think we should both know what' s going on. |
|
bù wǒ yīng gāi liú xià lái wǒ men liǎng gè dōu gāi liú xià lái shàng kè. |
|
Susan: Oh, good. This' ll be fun. |
|
hěn hǎo, yí dìng huì hěn yǒu yì sī de |
|
Teacher: Alrighty. We' re gonna start with some basic third stage breathing exercises, so Mummies, why don' t you get on your back? And... coaches, you should be supporting Mummy' s head. |
|
shǒu xiān shì dì sān jiē duàn jī běn hū xī liàn xí, gè wèi mā mā qǐng tǎng xià, jiào liàn men zhī chēng mā mā men de tóu, |
|
Ross and Susan each gesture for the other to lie down. |
|
Ross and Susan: What? What? What? shén me? |
|
Susan: I am supposed to be the mommy? wǒ gāi dāng mā? |
|
Ross: Okay, I' m gonna play my sperm card one more time. |
|
hǎo ba, wǒ zài dǎ yī cì pái |
|
Susan: Look, I don' t see why I should have to miss out on the coaching training just because I' m a woman. |
|
zhǐ yīn wǒ shì gè nǚ rén wǒ jiù dé cuò guò jiào liàn xùn liàn |
|
Ross: I see. So what do you propose to do? |
|
liǎo jiě, nǐ shuō gāi zěn me bàn? |
|
Susan: I will flip you for it. zhì tóng bǎn |
|
Ross: Flip me for it? No, no, no... heads, heads, heads! |
|
zhì tóng bǎn? bù wǒ xuǎn tóu |
|
Susan: Triumphantly On your back... Mom. |
|
tǎng xià ba, mā |
|
Ross gets down like all the other mothers, cradled in Susan' s lap like all the other fathers. |
|
Teacher: Alright, Mommies, take a nice deep cleansing breath. |
|
Forgetting herself, Susan does the " Mommy" action with Ross. |
|
gè wèi mā mā men, qǐng shēn hū xī |
|
Teacher: Good. Now imagine your vagina is opening like a flower. |
|
hěn hǎo, hěn hǎo, xiàn zài qǐng xiǎng xiàng nǐ de xiàng huā yí yàng zhàn fàng zhe |
|
Ross comes out of character to glare into the distance. |
|
Scene: Chandler' s Office. Chandler is playing with a toy as his boss Mr. Douglas knocks and opens the door. |
|
Chandler: Mr. D, how' s it going, sir? dí xiān shēng, rú hé? |
|
Mr. Douglas: Ohh, it' s been better. The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in. |
|
hǎo duō le, nián dù jìng zhí yǐ jīng suàn chū lái le |
|
Chandler: And? rán hòu ne? |
|
Mr. Douglas: It' s pretty ugly. We haven' t seen an ANUS this bad since the seventies. |
|
qí cǎn wú cǐ, 70 nián dài zhī hòu méi jiàn guò zhè me cǎn de ANUS |
|
Chandler: So what does this mean? zhè dài biǎo shén me? |
|
Mr. Douglas: Well, we' re gonna be layin' off people in every department. |
|
měi gè bù mén dōu dé cái yuán |
|
Chandler: Hey, listen, I know I came in late last week, but I slept funny, and my hair was very very |
|
wǒ zhī dào suī rán wǒ shàng xīng qī chí dào, wǒ nà tiān shuì zī bù liáng bǎ tóu fà shuì tā? |
|
Mr. Douglas: Not you. Relax. Ever have to fire anyone? |
|
bú shì nǐ, fàng sōng, céng jīng bì xū kāi chú mǒu rén ma? |
|
Scene: Chandler' s Office, later that day, Nina is in his office. |
|
Chandler: Nina? Nina. He goes around his desk to where she is sitting. Nina. In pain Nina. |
|
She sympathetically reaches out to fondle the inner thigh of his left leg. |
|
Nina: Are you okay? |
|
Chandler: Looking down at her hand Yes, yes I am. Err, listen, the reason that I called you in here today was, err... please don' t hate me. |
|
tīng zhe, wǒ jīn tiān jiào nǐ jìn lái shì yīn wèi, qǐng bié hèn wǒ |
|
Nina: Taking her hand away What? zěn me le? |
|
Chandler: Suddenly bright Would you like to have dinner sometime? |
|
néng yuē nǐ gòng jìn wǎn cān ma? |
|
Nina gasps in surprise and relief. |
|
Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is at the counter, serving coffee to Phoebe. |
|
Rachel: So Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday? |
|
fēi bǐ, nǐ xiǎng yào shén me shēng rì lǐ wù? |
|
Phoebe: Well, what I really want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me. |
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wǒ xiǎng yào wǒ mā fù huó hé wǒ gòng xiǎng rén shēng |
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Rachel: Okay... Let me put it this way. Anything from Crabtree and Evelyn? |
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hǎo ba. zhè yàng ba. xiǎng bù xiǎng yào" ài fú lín" de chǎn pǐn? |
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Phoebe: Ooh! Bath salts would be nice. |
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wǒ xiǎng yào yù yán! |
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Rachel: Ooh, okay... good. hǎo de! |
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Jamie Buchman and Fran Devanow enter the coffee house. They look about them as Jamie removes her coat and scarf. |
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Jamie: What is this place? zhè shì shén me dì fang? |
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Fran: Look, you' re cold, I have to pee, and... indicating the sign .. there' s a cup of coffee on the window. How bad could it be? |
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nǐ hěn lěng, wǒ xiǎng niào niào, chuāng hù shàng yǒu gè kā fēi bēi, hái yǒu bǐ zhè gèng zāo de ma? |
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Jamie notices Phoebe sitting at the counter. |
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Jamie: I think we have an answer. wǒ xiǎng wǒ men yǒu dá àn le |
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Fran: What' s she doing here? tā zěn me huì zài zhè ér? |
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Jamie: This could be God' s way of telling us to eat at home. |
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yě xǔ zhè jiù shì lǎo tiān yé jiào wǒ men huí jiā chī fàn de fāng fǎ |
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Fran: Think she got fired at Riff' s? tā bèi ruì fú cān tīng kāi chú? |
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Jamie: No, no, no. We were there last night. She kept... shuddering at the memory .. bringing swordfish. Indicating the ladies' bathroom are you gonna go to the, um? |
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bù, zuó wǎn wǒ men hái zài na r chī fàn, tā bù duàn duān lái jiàn yú. nǐ bú shì yào qù? |
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Fran: I' m gonna wait till after we order. It' s her, right. |
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bù, diǎn wán zhī hòu zài qù, shì tā ba? |
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Jamie: It looks like her. kàn qǐ lái xiàng tā |
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Phoebe walks by, ignoring the two strangers. |
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Jamie: Um, excuse me. bào qiàn? |
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Phoebe: Yeah? |
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Jamie: Hi, it' s us. shì wǒ men |
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Phoebe: Smiling blankly Right, and it' s me. hǎo ya, shì wǒ |
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Jamie: So, so you' re here too? nǐ yě zài zhè ér? |
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Phoebe: Much as you are. hé nǐ men yí yàng |
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Jamie: Without moving her lips Your turn. gāi nǐ le |
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Fran: Err... we know what we want. wǒ men zhī dào wǒ men yào shén me |
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Phoebe: Philosophically Oh, that' s good. hěn hǎo |
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Jamie: All we want is two Caffe Lattes. wǒ men yào liǎng bēi ná tiě |
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Fran: And some biscotti cookies. hái yǒu xiǎo bǐng gān |
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Phoebe: Good choice. bù cuò de xuǎn zé |
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Phoebe turns away so that the two weird women won' t see the face she pulls, and sits down. |
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Jamie: Definitely her. jué duì shì tā |
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Fran: Yeah. |
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Commercial break |
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Scene: Monica and Rachel' s, Phoebe is watching a Spanish version of The Waltons. At a nearby table sit Monica knitting, Rachel winding a ball of wool, and Chandler supplying them both from a skein which is spread between his hands. |
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Phoebe uses the remote to stop the Spanish by turning off the television. |
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Monica: I can' t believe you. You still haven' t told that girl she doesn' t have a job yet? |
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wǒ zhēn bù gǎn xiāng xìn, nǐ hái méi gào sù tā tā shī yè le? |
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Chandler: Well, you still haven' t taken down the Christmas lights. |
|
nǐ hái méi bǎ shèng dàn dēng ná xià lái |
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Monica: Congratulations, I think you' ve found the world' s thinnest argument. |
|
gōng xǐ! nǐ fā xiàn le shì shàng zuì bó ruò de lùn diǎn |
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Chandler: I' m just trying to find the right moment, you know? |
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wǒ zhǐ shì zài xún zhǎo shì dàng de shí jī |
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Rachel: Oh, well, that shouldn' t be so hard, now that you' re dating. Imitating men at their worst " Sweetheart, you' re fired, but how ' bout a quickie before I go to work?" |
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yīng gāi bú huì tài nán zhǎo dào yīn wèi nǐ men yǐ kāi shǐ yuē huì, qīn ài de, nǐ bèi kāi chú le wǒ shàng bān qián hé bù lái gè" sù zhàn sù jué" |
|
Joey lets himself in, carrying a large paper shopping bag. |
|
Joey: Hey. |
|
Rachel and Chandler: Hey. |
|
There is a loud knocking at the door through which Joey has just entered. |
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Chandler: You know, once you' re inside, you don' t have to knock any more. |
|
jìn mén hòu jiù bù yòng zài qiāo mén le |
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Monica: I' ll get it. wǒ lái kāi |
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She rises, dragging Chandler along by the wool. Rachel has to leap over a chair to follow them. Monica opens the door to find Mr. Heckles standing there. |
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Monica: Oh. Hi, Mr. Heckles. hā kè xiān shēng |
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Mr. Heckles: You' re doing it again. nǐ men yòu lái le |
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Monica: We' re not doing anything. We' re just sitting around talking, quietly. |
|
wǒ men shén me dōu méi zuò. wǒ men zhǐ shì zuò zài zhè ér jìng jìng dì liáo tiān |
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Mr. Heckles: I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats can' t sleep. |
|
wǒ kě yǐ tòu guò tiān huā bǎn tīng jiàn, wǒ de māo shuì bù zháo |
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Rachel: You don' t even have cats. nǐ gēn běn méi yǎng māo |
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Mr. Heckles: I could have cats. wǒ yuán běn yǒu jī huì yǎng |
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Monica: Closing the door Goodbye Mr. Heckles. zài jiàn le, hā xiān shēng |
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Rachel: We' ll try to keep it down. wǒ men huì hěn xiǎo shēng de |
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The woolbound trio returns to the table. Rachel has to rush ahead to avoid becoming tangled. Joey brings the shopping bag over to Phoebe, and takes out a nice cardigan. |
|
Joey: Phoebe, could you do me a favour? Could you try this on? I just wanna make sure it fits. |
|
fēi bǐ, bāng gè máng, néng shì chuān kàn kàn ma? wǒ xiǎng zhī dào hé bù hé shēn? |
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Phoebe: Ooh, my first birthday present... delightedly examining the cardigan in her lap .. oh, this is really... |
|
wǒ de dì yī jiàn shēng rì lǐ wù, zhè yī fú zhēn |
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Joey: Oh, no no no. It' s for Ursula. I just figured, you know, sizewise. |
|
bù, shì sòng wū sū lā de, wǒ zhǐ shì xiǎng zhī dào chǐ cùn |
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Phoebe: Ohhh... Sure, yeah... disgustedly dropping the cardigan back into the bag .. okay, it fits. hǎo ya, hé shēn |
|
The others have been taking all this in. |
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Rachel: Are you seein' her again tonight? nǐ jīn wǎn yòu hé tā yuē huì? |
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Joey: Yep. Ice Capades. , qù kàn huā yàng huá bīng |
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Chandler: Wow, this is serious. I' ve never known you to pay money for any kind of capade. |
|
zhè huí nǐ shì lái zhēn de méi xiǎng dào nǐ huì wèi rèn hé huā shì wán yì ér fù qián |
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Joey: I don' t know. I like her, you know. She' s different. There' s uh, somethin' about her. |
|
wǒ yě bù zhī dào, wǒ xǐ huān tā, tā yǔ zhòng bù tóng, tā yǒu |
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Phoebe: That you like, snappily confronting Joey over the heads of the knitting circle we get it. You like her. Great! |
|
nǐ xǐ huān? wǒ men dǒng nǐ xǐ huān tā, tài hǎo le |
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The circle freezes in apprehension. |
|
Joey: Hey, Phoebe, I asked you, and you said it was okay. |
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fēi bǐ, wǒ wèn guò nǐ ér nǐ yě tóng yì le |
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Phoebe: Alright, well, maybe now it' s not okay. |
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yě xǔ xiàn zài bù tóng yì le |
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Joey: Okay... Well maybe now I' m not okay with it not being okay. |
|
yě xǔ wǒ duì yú nǐ de bù tóng yì yě bù tóng yì le |
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Phoebe: Okay. hǎo ba! |
|
An embarrassed silence... finally broken by |
|
Chandler: Knit, good woman, knit, knit! kuài zhī, hǎo nǚ rén |
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Monica frantically bursts into action as Rachel resumes winding, tangling Chandler' s wool. |
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Scene: Chandler' s Office, Chandler Nina are locked in a passionate embrace. Someone knocks, so they hurriedly separate to stare out of the window. Chandler' s boss opens the door. |
|
Chandler: And that' s the Chrysler Building right there. |
|
kè lái sī lè dà lóu jiù zài na r |
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Mr. Douglas: Nina. nī nà! |
|
Nina: Mr. Douglas... flirting defensively .. cool tie. |
|
dào gé lā sī xiān shēng. lǐng dài bù cuò |
|
She escapes, fortunately so distracting Mr. Douglas, that he misses Chandler' s expression of alarm guilt. |
|
Mr. Douglas: Shutting the door, then pointing vaguely at Nina' s shapely departure She' s still here. tā hái zài zhè lǐ? |
|
Chandler: Yes, yes she is. Didn' t I memo you on this? See, after I let her go, err, I got a call from her psychiatrist, Dr. Flanennen, Dr. Flanen, Dr. Flan. |
|
méi cuò, tā hái zài. wǒ méi yǒu gěi nǐ zhè gè bèi wàng lù ma? wǒ kāi chú tā hòu, jiē dào tā xīn lǐ yī shēng de diàn huà, fú fú lín dài fū, |
|
Thinking quickly, Chandler desperately tries to remember anything to do with schizophrenia.... |
|
Chandler: And err, he informed me that uh, she took the news rather badly, in fact, he uh, mentioned the word frenzy. |
|
tā shuō tā yī shí wú fǎ shì yìng, lǎo shí shuō tā tí dào" kuáng bào" zhè liǎng gè zì |
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Mr. Douglas: You' re kidding? She seems so... tā? kāi shén me wán xiào? tā |
|
Chandler: Oh, no, no. Nina... miming fairies twinkling around his head .. she is whooo weweewoo whoo whoo! In fact, if you asked her right now, she would have no recollection of being fired at all, none at all. |
|
bù, nī nà? tā rú guǒ nǐ xiàn zài wèn tā, tā gēn běn jì bù dé bèi kāi chú zhè jiàn shì |
|
Mr. Douglas: That' s unbelievable. nán yǐ zhì xìn |
|
Chandler: And yet, believable. So I decided not to fire her again until I can be assured that she will be no threat to herself, or others. |
|
nǐ bù dé bù xìn. yīn cǐ wǒ jué dìng zàn shí bù zài kāi chú tā, zhí dào wǒ què dìng tā duì zì jǐ huò qí tā rén bù gòu chéng wēi xié wéi zhǐ |
|
Mr. Douglas: I see. I guess you never really know what' s goin' on inside a person' s head. |
|
rén de xīn zhōng zài xiǎng shén me bié rén yǒng yuǎn wú fǎ wán quán liǎo jiě |
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Chandler: Well, I guess that' s why they call it psychology, sir. |
|
wǒ xiǎng zhè jiù shì wèi shí me bèi chéng wéi" xīn lǐ xué" le |
|
Mr. Douglas screws up his eyes, trying to credit what Bing has just said, but turning to follow Nina down the corridor, he realises Bing must be telling the truth, since he would not have any personal interest in the girl, would he? |
|
Scene: Lamaze class, Ross is again on the floor, cradled in Susan' s lap, but now Carol is cradled in his lap, and she has a pretend baby, on her lap. The teacher is showing her class a video, which is about to end. |
|
Soothing male voice: .. a sound Mom and Dad never forget. For this after all, is the miracle of birth. |
|
bà mā yǒng yuǎn wàng bù liǎo zhè shēng yīn. zhè gè, bì jìng shì shēng chǎn de qí jī |
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Teacher: Lights please? And that' s having a baby. Next week is our final class. |
|
qǐng kāi dēng, zhè yī jí shì shēng bǎo bǎo. xià zhōu shì wǒ men de zuì hòu yī táng kè |
|
People start getting up. Ross grabs Carol' s doll to hold it upside down like a football, slapping it with his other hand. |
|
Ross: Susan, go deep. sū shān, zhǔn bèi jiē qiú |
|
Susan just glares back, as Ross' s inappropriate joke falls flat. Meanwhile, a bubble is about to burst... |
|
Carol: This is impossible. It' s just impossible. |
|
zhè tài lí pǔ le |
|
Susan: What is, honey? zěn me le? |
|
Carol: What that woman... did. I am not doin' that. It' s just gonna have to stay in, that' s all, everything will be the same, it' ll just stay in. |
|
nà gè nǚ rén gàn le shén me. wǒ bú huì zhè me zuò de. tā dé liú zài wǒ tǐ nèi. yī qiè hé yuán lái yí yàng, tā dé liú zài wǒ tǐ nèi |
|
Ross: Carol, honey, shhh, shhh, everything' s gonna be alright. |
|
kǎ luó, qīn ài de, bú huì yǒu shì de |
|
Carol: Turning on Ross OH, WHAT DO YOU KNOW? NOONE' S GOING UP TO YOU AND SAYING, " HI, IS THAT YOUR NOSTRIL? MIND IF WE PUSH THIS POT ROAST THROUGH IT?" |
|
nǐ zěn me zhī dào? nǐ zěn me zhī dào? méi rén wèn nǐ, wǒ néng jiāng zhè ròu kuài chuān nǐ de bí kǒng ma? |
|
Susan: Carol, Carol, sweetie. Cleansing breath. kǎ luó, qīn ài de, shēn hū xī |
|
Both women gulp in air. Ross looks at his " football," then manipulates the head limbs back into place, until it resembles what it represents. |
|
Susan: I know it' s frightening, but, big picture. The birth part is just one day, and when it' s over, we' re all gonna be parents for the rest of our lives. |
|
wǒ zhī dào nǐ hěn huáng kǒng, wǎng yuǎn chù xiǎng. shēng chǎn guò chéng zhǐ shì yì tiān, jié shù hòu wǒ men zhè bèi zǐ dōu shì tā de fù mǔ le |
|
Ross is staring blankly into space. |
|
Susan: I mean, that' s what this is all about, right? Ross? Ross? |
|
huái tāi shēng zǐ wèi de bù jiù shì zhèi xiē ma? luó sī? |
|
Scene 13: Central Perk, the gang is gathered around Monica comforting her brother, who in a slight state of shock is cuddling a cushion for security. |
|
Ross: I' m gonna be a father. wǒ yào dāng bà bà le |
|
Rachel: This is just occurring to you? nǐ cái gāng zhī dào? |
|
Ross: I always knew I was havin' a baby, I just never realised the baby was having me. |
|
wǒ yī zhí dōu zhī dào wǒ yǒu gè hái zi, zhǐ shì bù zhī dào hái zi yǒu wǒ |
|
Rachel: She comforts him too Oh, you' re gonna be great! |
|
nǐ huì shì gè hǎo bà bà de |
|
Ross: Aw, how can you say that? I can' t even get Marcel to stop eating the bath mat. How am I gonna raise a kid? |
|
nǐ zěn huì zhī dào? wǒ lián zǔ zhǐ mǎ xiū chī yù shì diàn dōu bàn bú dào, wǒ rú hé yǎng ér yù nǚ? |
|
Chandler: You know, Ross, some scientists are now saying that, that monkeys and babies are actually different. |
|
luó sī, kē xué jiā shuō. hái zi hé hóu zi shì bù yí yàng de, wǒ men kě yǐ yàn zhèng yī xià |
|
Joey tires of this, so he gets up to leave. |
|
Phoebe: Where' re you going? nǐ qù nǎ lǐ? |
|
Joey: Out. wài miàn |
|
Phoebe: With? hé shuí? |
|
Joey: Spreading his arms wide Yes. shì de |
|
Phoebe: Alright, could I just ask you one question? |
|
néng wèn nǐ yí gè wèn tí ma? |
|
Joey nods his head. |
|
Phoebe: Have you two, you know... like... you know... you know... yet? |
|
nǐ men yǒu méi yǒu, nǐ míng bái de, jiù xiàng, nǐ zhī dào de ma? nǐ zhī dào de, duì ba? |
|
Joey: Well, not that it' s any of your business, but, no, we haven' t, okay? |
|
bù guān nǐ de shì, méi yǒu, xíng le ma? |
|
Joey walks toward the door, then hesitates and turns back. |
|
Joey: You meant sex, right? nǐ shì zhǐ xìng ba? |
|
Phoebe buttons her lip, while the rest of the gang pretend they' re not there. |
|
Scene: Chandler' s Office, Chandler is working as Nina knocks, then opens the door. |
|
Nina: Do you have a sec? yǒu kòng ma? |
|
Chandler: Ah, sure, Nina. What' s up? dāng rán, shén me shì? |
|
Nina: I don' t know. For the past couple days, people have been avoiding me and giving me these really strange looks. |
|
zuì jìn jǐ tiān, dà jiā dōu bì kāi wǒ ér qiě yǐ qí guài de yǎn shén kàn wǒ |
|
Chandler: Oh, well, ah... maybe that' s because they' re ah... jealous, of us. |
|
huò xǔ tā men zài jí dù wǒ men |
|
Nina: Maybe. But that doesn' t explain why they keep taking my scissors. |
|
huò xǔ ba, zhè wú fǎ jiě shì tā men wèi hé ná zǒu wǒ de jiǎn dāo |
|
Chandler: Ah, well, maybe that' s, ah, because you' re getting a big raise. |
|
huò xǔ shì yīn wèi nǐ bèi shēng zhí de yuán gù |
|
Nina: I am? wǒ shēng zhí le? |
|
Chandler: Sure, why not? dāng rán. wèi shí me bù ne? |
|
Nina: Oh my god! Rushing over to give him a big hug You' re amazing! tiān a, nǐ zhēn shì tài liǎo bù qǐ le |
|
Chandler: Oh, you don' t know. Presses a button. Helen, could you make sure we put through the paperwork on Miss Bookbinder' s raise? |
|
nǐ bù zhī dào, hǎi lún, néng kuài chǔ lǐ bù xiǎo jiě shēng zhí de shǒu xù ma? |
|
Helen: Over the intercom So you still want me to send her psychological profile to Personnel? |
|
nǐ réng yào wǒ ná tā de xīn lǐ fēn xī jié guǒ dào rén shì bù? |
|
Nina: What? |
|
Chandler: Helen drinks. Insincerely Will you marry me? |
|
hǎi lún hē zuì le, nǐ yuàn yì jià gěi wǒ ma? |
|
Nina puts her hands on her hips, then gives Chandler a quizzical look. |
|
Scene: Monica and Rachel' s, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are sharing a bowl of popcorn, while Monica carefully reads the instruction manual for her television set. |
|
Chandler: Well, I ended up telling her everything. |
|
zuì hòu wǒ bǎ yī qiè dōu gào sù tā le |
|
Rachel: Oh, how' d she take it? tā de fǎn yìng rú hé? |
|
Chandler: Pretty well. Except for the stapler thing. He holds up a bandaged hand. Little tip: if you' re ever in a similar situation, never ever leave your hand... he mimes Nina taking her revenge .. on the desk. |
|
tǎn rán jiē shòu, chú le ná dīng shū jī dīng wǒ zhī wài. tí shì. yǐ hòu yù jiàn lèi sì de zhuàng kuàng, qiè jì bié bǎ shǒu fàng zài zhuō shàng |
|
Monica: Okay, I think I get how to do this. |
|
wǒ zhī dào gāi zěn me diào chéng zhè yàng le a |
|
Monica points the remote at her TV, and punches out a key combination from the book, but the dreaded SAP logo remains and Spanish still comes forth. |
|
Phoebe: Alright, so, can we turn this off? Can we just make it... make them go away? Because I can' t, I can' t watch. |
|
wǒ men néng bǎ zhè guān diào ma? bǎ tā men nòng zǒu, yīn wèi wǒ méi fǎ kàn le a |
|
Monica: Remotely turning off the television okay, Pheebs, they' re gone. |
|
hǎo le, xiàn zài méi yǒu le |
|
Phoebe: Okay. |
|
Monica: Are you alright? nǐ hái hǎo ba? |
|
Phoebe: Yeah. It' s just, you know, it' s this whole stupid Ursula thing, it' s... |
|
hái bú shì wū sū lā rě de huò |
|
Rachel: Okay, Pheebs, can I ask? So, he' s going out with her. I mean, is it really so terrible? |
|
fēi bǐ, wǒ néng wèn tā hé tā yuē huì zhēn yǒu nà me zāo ma? |
|
Phoebe: Um, yeah. Look, I mean, I' m not saying she' s like evil or anything. She just, you know, she' s always breaking my stuff. When I was eight, and I wouldn' t let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under the bus. And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... Have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend? |
|
shì de. wǒ bú shì shuō tā shì hěn huài, tā zǒng shì nòng huài wǒ de dōng xī. wǒ 8 suì shí, tā bǎ wǒ dé zhū dí jié tè sēn rè shuǐ hú diū dào gōng chē xià, wǒ 12 suì de shí hòu, tā nòng duàn le wǒ de suǒ gǔ, tā bú shì yǒu yì de, bù guò yě suàn, rán hòu, yǒu gè lán dí bù lǎng, jiù xiàng, nǐ men yǒu méi yǒu guò nán yǒu shēn jiān hǎo yǒu de qíng kuàng? |
|
Monica and Rachel: Wistfully, shaking their heads No. |
|
Phoebe: Well, but that' s what he was for me. And she you know, kind of stole him away, and then... broke his heart... and then he wouldn' t even talk to me any more. Because he said he didn' t wanna be around... anything that looked like either one of us. |
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wǒ dāng shí de zhuàng kuàng jiù shì rú cǐ. tā bǎ tā qiǎng zǒu yòu shāng le tā de xīn, tā cóng cǐ bù hé wǒ shuō huà, yīn wèi tā shuō tā bù yuàn zài jiàn xiàng tā de rén |
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Rachel: Oh... Oh, Pheebs. |
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Phoebe: I mean, I know Joey is not my boyfriend, or my thermos, or anything, but... |
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wǒ zhī dào qiáo yī bú shì wǒ nán péng yǒu huò zhě rè shuǐ hú, huò qí tā de shén me, dàn shì |
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Chandler: You' re not gonna lose him. nǐ bú huì shī qù tā de |
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Monica: Hon, you gotta talk to Joey. nǐ dé zhǎo qiáo yī tán |
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Phoebe: Yeah. Okay. |
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Ross: No, come on, he doesn' t know this stuff. If he knew how you felt. |
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rú guǒ tā zhī dào nǐ de gǎn shòu |
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Phoebe: But he' s falling in love with her. |
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dàn tā ài shàng tā le |
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Rachel: Oh please, they' ve been going out a week. They haven' t even slept together yet, I mean, that' s not serious. |
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bài tuō, tā men cái yuē huì yí gè xīng qī, gēn běn hái méi shàng chuáng bā zì dōu hái méi yī piě ne |
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Phoebe: Okay... Okay. hǎo ba. hǎo ba |
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Monica and Ross indicate that they mean right now. |
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Phoebe: Oh, okay, oh. |
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Phoebe gets up and walks acRoss the hallway, but the door to Chandler and Joey' s apartment is shut. She knocks, and anxiously waits for Joey to come, but instead her identical twin sister emerges wearing one of Joey' s shirts. |
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Ursula: Surprised Oh. |
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Phoebe reels back in shock, while Ursula defiantly leans against the doorpost as though she owns the place. |
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Ursula: Yeah, um, may we help you? xū yào bāng máng ma? |
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Closing Credits |
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Scene: Monica and Rachel' s Balcony, Rachel is taking down the Christmas lights. Monica sees her, so she leans out of the small side window. |
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Monica: Rachel, what are you doing? It' s freezing out here. Would you come back inside? |
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ruì qiū, nǐ zài gàn shén me? wài miàn hǎo lěng, jìn lái hǎo ma? |
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Rachel: No no no no no. You wanted me to take them down, so... she climbs onto the railing to reach the top of a pole .. I' m takin' ' em down. Okay? Whoa! Screams. |
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bù nǐ yào wǒ bǎ dēng qǔ xià, wǒ zhèng zài zuò, xíng ma? |
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Rachel slips, loses her balance, and falls over the edge.. |
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Monica: Ohmygod Rachel! Rushing out to look over the edge Rachel! |
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tiān a, ruì qiū! |
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In the apartment below, Mr. Heckles is trying to relax and read his newspaper, but Rachel is helplessly dangling upsidedown with her ankle wrapped up in the Christmas lights. |
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Rachel: To Monica I' m okay! I' m okay! She knocks on Mr. Heckles' s window. Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please? |
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wǒ méi shì hā kè xiān shēng hā kè xiān shēng néng bāng yī xià máng ma? |
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Mr. Heckles: See, this is just the kind of thing I was talking about. |
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wǒ zhǐ de jiù shì zhè zhǒng shì ér |
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End |
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English translations... |
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Snowploughs are clearing the streets. |
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Ross has got antenatal class. |
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The girls divide some Chinese takeaway. |
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Ursula brought a toasted tuna sandwich |
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and four plates of crinkle cut chips. |
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You wanna watch Laverne and Shirley? |
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Each couple learns how to change a nappy. |
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The ladies' toilet. |
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We want two creamy espressos |
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and some biscuits biscuits. |