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These are the things that I think when I've had two bottles of red wine to drink, |
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and I hope another dream don't have to fall short, just lounging in my basketball shorts. |
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Look, I've finally married someone, I'm in love, I'm not alone. |
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But marriage has some struggles of its own. |
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And that creates a problem 'cause if I go and put that in my lyrics then my wife will be the first person to hear it. |
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I married my best friend. I've got the best friends and a stack of photos covered in some dust particles and some dead skin. |
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Sometimes I think about the baby that I used to be and how it's all just ultimately leading to my eulogy. |
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You see, life hurts like a bitch sometimes. I mean sometimes, I hate the fuckin' sunshine so I go get enough wine at one time to lay up in my confines and unwind while vibin' to some Sublime. |
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I just want to take my mind off all this angry fan mail accusing me of selling out, telling me I ran stale. |
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Getting hurt by people that I'm trying to please, apparently I need to rap while on the flying trapeze. |
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Jeez, I bought another lottery ticket tonight and out the six numbers I picked not one single digit was right. |
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But life's been so stressful that I'll be honest, the last thing I need is a hundred million dollars. |
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These are the things that I think when I've had two bottles of red wine to drink, |
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and I hope another dream don't have to fall short, just lounging in my basketball shorts. |
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Listen, these days my dad is my friend. |
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Last night at the Super Bowl we had martinis with gin and he told me that he thinks Beyonce is a 9.5- maybe a 10, she has really pretty skin, and I smiled. |
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I like smiling. I like fantasizing about the day I'm gonna own my own island. |
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I like fantasizing about the day that this anxiety won't constantly be turning all my skies gray. |
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Over-analyitcal, constantly self-critical, I don't need three wishes, just one: make me invisible. |
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'Cause I remember days I'd get on stage to a crowd of twenty people and only five of them paid. |
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Rich kids with college degrees coming up and saying, "Fuck fame and money. Never (___?) |
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I love your music, I downloaded all of it free. Why would you care? You're a rap star, your profit is deep." |
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Jeez, life hurts like a bitch but sometimes I love it. Seriously, sometimes I look at my life and straight love it. But only on the days I close my eyes and say fuck it. |
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These are the things that I think when I've had two bottles of red wine to drink, |
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and I hope another dream don't have to fall short, just lounging in my basketball shorts. |
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And I'm looking for and I'm looking for tomorrow 'cause paradise is found in a bottle, paradise is found in a bottle, yes it is. |
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And the woman on the plane in front of me, she keeps farting and it smells so bad that I can't take a nap. |
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I think she's gotta take a crap but that's neither here nor there. |
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Here we go. |
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Look man, I'm just searching for a pot of gold. |
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I fear the day that people say my heart has gotten cold. |
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Staring at my friends at Guitar Center, I am your broken-hearted, scarred, minner. |
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Oh shit, I'm gonna have a baby in like ten days. |
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He's gonna be my little prince, I can't wait. |
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Life is intense and you know I'm gonna take a knife when I glimpse. |
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These are the things that I think when I've had a bottle of red wine to drink, |
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and I hope another dream don't have to fall short when I'm lounging in my basketball shorts. |
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Wait, no, no. |
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These are the things that I think when I've had two bottles of red wine to drink, |
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and I hope another dream don't have to fall short when I'm lounging in my Jayhawks basketball shorts. That's KU, by the way. |
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These are the things that I think when I've had three bottles of red wine to drink, |
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and I want a couple LA tacos and some motherfucking Roscoe's, always. |
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These are the things that I think when I've had five bottles of red wine to drink, |
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and that's way too much wine to drink. |