| Song | The Artisans |
| Artist | Orange Juice |
| Album | Coals to Newcastle |
| I used to spend each afternoon | |
| Just locked in the confines of my room | |
| 'Cause my mother told me that I never should | |
| Play with the gypsies down in the wood | |
| Then I fell in with a bunch of hoods | |
| Who go by the name of the 'Artisans' | |
| Gonna trade in my snakeskin boots | |
| Gonna trade in my rhinestone suit | |
| 'Cause I'm in cahoots with the 'Artisans' | |
| Who just happen to be my favourite band | |
| At the best all the rest are just 'also rans' | |
| When compared to the fabulous 'Artisans' |