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Sacha Baron Cohen - Master Of The House |
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My band of soaks |
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My den of dissolutes |
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My dirty jokes my always **** as newts. |
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My sons of whores |
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Spent their lives in my inn |
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Homing pigeons homing in |
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Then fly through my doors |
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And I * down on all faults |
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Welcome m'sieur |
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Sit yourself down |
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And meet the best |
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Innkeeper in town |
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As for the rest |
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All of 'em crooks |
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Rooking their guests |
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And cooking the books |
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Seldom do you see |
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Honest men like me |
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A gent of good intent |
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Who's content to be |
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Master of the house |
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Doling out the charm |
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Ready with a handshake |
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And an open palm |
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Tells a saucy tale |
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Makes a little stir |
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Customers appreciate a bon-viveur |
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Glad to do a friend a favor |
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Doesn't cost me to be nice |
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But nothing gets you nothing |
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Everything has got a little price! |
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Master of the house |
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Keeper of the zoo |
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Ready to relieve 'em |
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Of a sou or two |
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Watering the wine |
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Making up the weight |
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Pickin' up their knick-knacks |
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When they can't see straight |
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Everybody loves a landlord |
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Everybody's buxom friend |
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I do whatever pleases |
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Jesus! won't i bleed 'em in the end! |
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Master of the house |
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Quick to catch yer eye |
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Never wants a passerby |
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To pass him by |
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Servant to the poor |
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Butler to the great |
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Comforter philosopher |
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And lifelong mate! |
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Everybody's boon companion |
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Everybody's chaperone |
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But lock up your valises |
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Jesus! won't i skin you to the bone! |
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Food beyond compare |
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Food beyond belief |
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Mix it in a mincer |
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And pretend it's beef |
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Kidney of a horse |
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Liver of a cat |
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Filling up the sausages |
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With this and that |
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Residents are more than welcome |
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Bridal suite is occupied |
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Reasonable charges |
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Plus some little extras on the side! |
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Charge 'em for the lice |
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Extra for the mice |
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Two percent for looking in the mirror twice |
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Here a little slice |
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There a little cut |
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Three percent for sleeping with the window shut |
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When it comes to fixing prices |
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There are a lot of tricks he knows |
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How it all increases |
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All those bits and pieces |
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Jesus! it's amazing how it grows! |
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I used to dream |
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That i would meet a prince |
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But god almighty |
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Have you seen what's happened since? |
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Master of the house? |
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Isn't worth me spit! |
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'comforter philosopher' |
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- and lifelong ****! |
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Cunning little brain |
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Regular voltaire |
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Thinks he's quite a lover |
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But there's not much there |
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What a cruel trick of nature |
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Landed me with such a louse |
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God knows how i've lasted |
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Living with this **** in the house! |
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Master of the house! |
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Master and a half! |
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Comforter philosopher |
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Ah don't make me laugh! |
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Servant to the poor |
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Butler to the great |
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Hypocrite and toady |
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And inebriate! |
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Everybody bless the landlord! |
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Everybody bless his spouse! |
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Everybody raise a glass |
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Raise it up the master's **** |
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Everybody raise a glass to the master of the house! |
