| When I think of you Baton Rouge | |
| I think of a Mariachi band | |
| I think of sixteen and a crisp green football field | |
| I think of a girl I never had | |
| When I think of you Baton Rouge | |
| I think of a back seat in a car | |
| Windows are foggy and so are we | |
| as the police asked for our I.D. | |
| So helpless | |
| so helpless | |
| Ooohhh, ooohhh, so helpless | |
| ooohhh, so helpless | |
| Ooohhh, so helpless | |
| so helpless | |
| Well I once had a car lost it in a divorce | |
| the judge was a woman of course | |
| She said give her the car and the house and your taste | |
| or else I set the trial date | |
| So now when I think of you Baton Rouge | |
| and the deep southern belles with their touch | |
| I wonder where love ends and hate starts to blush | |
| in the fields in the swamps in the rush | |
| In the terra-cotta cobwebs of your mind | |
| when did you start seeing me as a spider spinning web | |
| Of malicious intent and you as poor, poor me | |
| at the fire at the joint, this disinterred and broken mount | |
| in the bedroom in the house where we were unmarried | |
| So helpless, so helpless | |
| so helpless | |
| So helpless, so helpless | |
| so helpless | |
| When was I the villain in your heart | |
| putting the brake on your start | |
| you slapped my face and cried and screamed | |
| that's what marriage came to mean | |
| The bitterest ending of a dream | |
| You wanted children and I did not | |
| was that what it was all about | |
| You might get a laugh when you hear me shout | |
| you might get a laugh when you hear me shout | |
| I wish I had | |
| So helpless, so helpless | |
| so helpless | |
| So helpless, so helpless | |
| so helpless | |
| Sometimes when I think of Baton Rouge | |
| I see us with two and a half strapping sons | |
| One and a half flushed daughters preparing to marry | |
| and two fat grandsons I can barely carry | |
| Daddy, uncle, family gathered there for grace | |
| a dog in a barbecue pit goes up in space | |
| The dream recedes in the morning with a bad aftertaste | |
| and I'm back in the big city worn from the race of the chase | |
| what a waste | |
| So thanks for the card the announcement of child | |
| and I must say you and Sam look great | |
| Your daughter's gleaming in that - | |
| - white wedding dress with pride | |
| sad to say I could never bring that to you that wide smile | |
| So I try not to think of Baton Rouge | |
| or of a, of a, of a Mariachi band | |
| Or of sixteen and a crisp green football field | |
| and the girl, and the girl I never had | |
| So helpless, so helpless | |
| so helpless | |
| So helpless, so helpless | |
| so helpless |