The Reluctant Conscript

Song The Reluctant Conscript
Artist Bobby Horton
Album Homespun Songs of the C. S. A., Volume 3

Lyrics

[00:23.741] How are you boys, I'm just from camp and feel as brave as Caesar
[00:27.408] The sound of bugle, drum, and fife has raised my Ebeneezer
[00:31.044] I'm full of fight, odd shots, and shell, I'll leap into the saddle
[00:34.961] And when the yankees see me come, Lord how they will skedaddle
[00:39.154] Hold your head up Shanghai shanks, don't shake your knees and blink so
[00:42.799] It's no time to dodge the act, brave comrades don't you think so
[00:54.575] I was a plow boy in the field, a gawking, lazy, dodger
[00:57.940] When came the conscript officer and took me for a soldier
[01:01.861] He put a musket in my hand and showed me how to fire it
[01:05.780] I marched and counter-marched all day; Lord, how I did admire it
[01:09.690] With corn and hog fat for my food, a digging, guarding, drilling
[01:13.613] I got as thin as twice-skimmed milk and scarcely worth the killing
[01:17.533] And now I'm used to homely fare, my skin is tough as leather
[01:21.175] I do guard duty cheerfully in every kind of weather
[01:33.207] 'Tis true I have not seen a fight, nor have I smelt gunpowder
[01:36.570] But then the way I'll pepper them will be a sin to chowder
[01:40.494] A sergeant's stripes I now will sport, perhaps be color bearer
[01:44.136] And then a captain, good for me, I'll be a regular terror
[01:48.058] Hold your head up Shanghai shanks, don't shake your knees and blink so
[01:51.970] It's no time to dodge the act, brave comrades don't you think so
[02:03.715] I'll then begin to wear the stars and then the wreathes of glory
[02:07.346] Until the army I command and poets sing my story
[02:11.267] Our congress will pass votes of thanks to him who rose from zero
[02:15.182] The people in a mass will shout, "Hurrah! Behold the Hero!"
[02:19.097] Hold your head up Shanghai shanks, don't shake your knees and blink so
[02:22.747] It's no time to dodge the act, brave comrades don't you think so
[02:40.652] What's that? Oh dear a boiler burst, a gas pipe has exploded
[02:44.006] Maybe the yankees are hard by with muskets ready loaded
[02:47.931] Oh gallant soldiers beat them back, I'll join you in the frolic
[02:51.846] But I've a chill from head to foot and symptoms of the colic
[03:03.639] Hold your head up Shanghai shanks, don't shake your knees and blink so
[03:07.282] It's no time to dodge the act, brave comrades don't you think so