| Song | San Antonio Foam Party |
| Artist | Half Man Half Biscuit |
| Album | Cammell Laird Social Club |
| If I had agoraphobia | |
| And if I had claustrophobia | |
| Trapped inside my porch | |
| Things would be bleak | |
| Especially midweek | |
| Your weird dreams | |
| Don’t impress in any way | |
| In dreams | |
| Weird things are mundane and everyday | |
| Strange to me would be | |
| Buying a loaf | |
| And coming straight home | |
| Try and get your arse downtown next week | |
| I’m going to prove once and for all | |
| To the LTA hey-hey-hey | |
| That Tim and Greg are not golden boys | |
| They are in fact automatons | |
| I’ve seen the chips and wires | |
| And the circuit boards | |
| “The reservoirs are colder | |
| And deeper than you think” | |
| Well stop, wait a minute Mr Spokesman | |
| You don’t know what I think | |
| Is your lake about | |
| (hmm now let’s see) | |
| A hundred miles deep | |
| And ninety below? | |
| And is it home to sharks? | |
| It’s gonna end up | |
| With the storming of a brothel in Palermo | |
| Sniffer dogs in, fluorescent bibs | |
| I’ve seen the chips and wires | |
| I’ve seen the circuit boards | |
| I’ve seen the chips and wires | |
| I’ve seen the circuit boards | |
| This is me pleading for some civic pride | |
| Use it or lose it the park and ride | |
| Twin town said we just weren’t cool | |
| So now we got a suicide pact with Goole | |
| I’ve seen the chips and wires | |
| I’ve seen the circuit boards | |
| I’ve seen the chips and wires | |
| I’ve seen the circuit boards |
| If I had agoraphobia | |
| And if I had claustrophobia | |
| Trapped inside my porch | |
| Things would be bleak | |
| Especially midweek | |
| Your weird dreams | |
| Don' t impress in any way | |
| In dreams | |
| Weird things are mundane and everyday | |
| Strange to me would be | |
| Buying a loaf | |
| And coming straight home | |
| Try and get your arse downtown next week | |
| I' m going to prove once and for all | |
| To the LTA heyheyhey | |
| That Tim and Greg are not golden boys | |
| They are in fact automatons | |
| I' ve seen the chips and wires | |
| And the circuit boards | |
| " The reservoirs are colder | |
| And deeper than you think" | |
| Well stop, wait a minute Mr Spokesman | |
| You don' t know what I think | |
| Is your lake about | |
| hmm now let' s see | |
| A hundred miles deep | |
| And ninety below? | |
| And is it home to sharks? | |
| It' s gonna end up | |
| With the storming of a brothel in Palermo | |
| Sniffer dogs in, fluorescent bibs | |
| I' ve seen the chips and wires | |
| I' ve seen the circuit boards | |
| I' ve seen the chips and wires | |
| I' ve seen the circuit boards | |
| This is me pleading for some civic pride | |
| Use it or lose it the park and ride | |
| Twin town said we just weren' t cool | |
| So now we got a suicide pact with Goole | |
| I' ve seen the chips and wires | |
| I' ve seen the circuit boards | |
| I' ve seen the chips and wires | |
| I' ve seen the circuit boards |