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I want to tell you all the story |
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'Bout a Harper Valley widowed wife |
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'Who had a teenage daughter |
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That attended Harper Valley Junior High |
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Well her daughter came home one afternoon |
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And didn't even stop to play |
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And she said, "Mom I got a note here |
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From the Harper Valley P.T.A." |
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Well the note says, "Mrs. Johnson |
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You're wearing your dresses way too high |
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It's reported you've been drinkin' |
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And a runnin' round with men and goin' wild" |
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Now we don't believe you ought to be |
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A bringin' up your little girl this way |
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And it was signed by the secretary |
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Harper Valley P.T.A. |
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Well it happened that the P.T.A . |
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Was gonna meet that very afternoon |
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And boy were they sure surprised |
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When Mrs. Johnson wore her miniskirt into the room |
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And as she walked up to the blackboard |
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I can still recall the words she had to say |
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She said, "I'd like to address this meeting |
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Of the Harper Valley P.T.A." |
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Now there's Bobby Taylor sittin' there |
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And seven times he asked me for a date |
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And Mrs. Taylor sure seems to use a lotta ice |
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Whenever he's away |
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And Mr. Baker can you tell us |
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Why your secretary had to leave this town? |
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And shouldn't widow Jones be told |
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To keep her window shades all pulled completely down? |
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Now Mr. Harper couldn't be here |
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'Cause he stayed too long at Kelly's Bar again |
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And if you'll smell Shirley Thompson's breath |
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You'll find she's had a little nip of gin |
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And when you have the nerve to tell me as a mother |
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You think that I ain't fit |
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Well, this is just a little Payton Place |
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And you're all Harper Valley hypocrites |
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Now, I wouldn't put you on |
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Because it really did it happened just this way |
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That day my mama socked it to the Harper Valley P.T.A. |
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That day my mama socked it to 'em at the Harper Valley P.T.A. |