| Brighten the corners and clear out the room | |
| Color the flowers in rose and maroon | |
| Light up the fires and season the swine | |
| We're gonna party like it's 1699 | |
| Slaughter the rabbits, the ducks, and the boars | |
| And lay all the tables and open the doors | |
| The creme de la creme will be waiting on one guest of honor | |
| Oh, up go the curtains and down go the virgins | |
| Oh no! Mothers are crying | |
| Ladies of virtue will stand to accuse you of heartbreak and theft | |
| Bells are gonna ring | |
| Birds are gonna sing | |
| Let the people begin | |
| The crowning of your big head | |
| Young drunken girls in a hideous dance | |
| Sing a heartfelt lament of the death of romance | |
| Beautiful boys turn and offer their cheeks | |
| Preening and prancing, the outcome looks bleak | |
| Good times are rolling but outside these walls | |
| Our houses will crumble, the city will fall | |
| But a few broken pawns don't mean nothing | |
| To our guest of honor | |
| So let's raise our glasses | |
| To murderous asses like you | |
| May you sleep soundly | |
| Once we have laughter you got what you're after | |
| Oh you wear it well | |
| Bells are gonna ring | |
| Birds are gonna sing | |
| Let the people begin | |
| Hear how the hearts are pounding | |
| We're all witnessing the crowning | |
| Of your big bleeding head | |
| Bells are gonna ring | |
| Birds are gonna sing | |
| Let the people begin | |
| Hear how the hearts are pounding | |
| Your eyes, nothing but astounding | |
| We're all witnessing the crowning | |
| Of your useless, ruthless head |