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Think it was a Sunday, sometime in January, |
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I could be wrong and I guess it isn't necessary, |
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But I remember that the ground was made of snow, |
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And if you went outside you better take your coat. |
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I must have been 19 years old I had a cashier job at a convenience store, |
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Workin' the counter makin' minimum dough, |
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Sellin' discount smokes to the neighborhood folk. |
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I didn't pay much thought to his ski mask, |
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Its Minnesota man your face'll freeze fast, |
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But I bet that I looked sorta dumb when I first caught sight of his bright orange gun. |
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There I am adrenalin high and trying to decide how I feel about his right hand, |
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Is that a-god damn-wait a minute, it is a flare gun, |
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And guess where he's aimin' it? |
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You probably ain't here to win the lottery, |
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So you obviously gotta be robbin' me. |
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He nodded his head so I opened up the till, |
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Grabbed the paper bag for the money 'cause I know the drill. |
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I handed him the cash and the food stamps, |
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And he just stood there lookin' all confused and I'm thinkin', |
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Yo why the **** ain't he movin'? |
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Come on crazy white boy don't do somethin' stupid. |
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That bag is worth maybe two thirty, |
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Not enough for you to pull the trigger back and burn me, |
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By now you should be down the street, |
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Ain't you ever see the way they do this shit on TV? |
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Yeah it was fun but it's done, |
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Now get out. |
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(Um, do you want me to get on the ground and start countin'?) |
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Before the ski mast even started noddin' I was already on that, |
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(One one thousand, Two one thousand) |
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The front door beeped I heard him leave so I called my boss and the Richfield police, |
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Gotta close the shop and lock the doors because some trailer trash just robbed the store. |
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(Eh, I don't know, maybe 5'10? [What was he wearing?] Skinny, flannel shirt, ski mask, [how much money?] two hundred thirty, maybe two fifty? [he threatened you with a flare gun?] yeah a flare gun [a flare gun?] yeah like a ****in' flare gun. a ball of fire comes out. [Police laughes] What would you do if i pointed a flare gun at you?) |
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Everybody acted so suspicious, |
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I guess the flare gun story seemed fictitious, |
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Are you accusing me of petty embezzlement? |
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Don't you see my left over adrenalin? |
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Bosses and cops can't be my friend. |
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Never felt loyalty to either again. |
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And to keep it real, |
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The irony didn't set, |
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Until a year later when I got fired for stealin' cigarettes. |
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(Gotta light?) |
