| She doesn't need money | |
| She doesn't need diamonds | |
| She's lookin' for pretty things | |
| She doesn't want romance | |
| She doesn't need finance | |
| She's looking for rendezvous | |
| But every time she's going down | |
| She never looks around | |
| I'll wait and watch her with my | |
| lens until she brings the curtain down | |
| 'There behind the keyhole' | |
| with my fisheye | |
| I'm back in the darkroom | |
| I'm covered in fixer | |
| I'm making a photograph | |
| I'll send her some postcards | |
| In glorious colour | |
| I'm keeping the negatives | |
| I'll form a letter from the news | |
| With different type from different lines | |
| I'll tell the world about her | |
| I'll mail the People and the Times | |
| 'Oo it'll be so scandalous | |
| For the both of them | |
| But mainly her' | |
| She showed them her husband | |
| He ordered a dozen | |
| He thought they were fabulous | |
| The one with the -------------- | |
| The two of the ---------------- | |
| And three of the -------------- | |
| He sold her to Hefner | |
| Who put her in Playboy | |
| He gave her a centre-fold | |
| I made a real blunder | |
| She made it in movies | |
| I made her a superstar |