The Irish Ballad

Song The Irish Ballad
Artist Tom Lehrer
Album Songs & More Songs by Tom Lehrer

Lyrics

[00:02.747] (Piano Intro)
[00:08.543] About a maid I'll sing a song, sing rikkity tikkity tin,
[00:12.952] About a maid I'll sing a song,
[00:15.229] Who didn't have her family long,
[00:18.072] Not only did she do them wrong,
[00:21.617] She did every one of them in, them in,
[00:25.445] She did every one of them in.
[00:29.125] One morning in a fit of pique,
[00:33.667] One morning in a fit of pique,
[00:35.794] She drowned her father in the creek,
[00:38.303] The water tasted bad for a week,
[00:42.006] And we had to make do with Gin, with Gin,
[00:45.830] We had to make do with Gin.
[00:49.445] Her mother she could never stand,
[00:53.945] Her mother she could never stand,
[00:56.231] And so a cyanide soup she planned,
[00:59.309] The mother died with a spoon in her hand,
[01:03.303] And her face in a hideous grin, a grin,
[01:07.548] Her face in a hideous grin.
[01:11.105] She set her sister's hair on fire,
[01:15.548] She set her sister's hair on fire,
[01:17.840] And as the smoke and flame rose higher,
[01:20.460] Danced around the funeral pyre,
[01:24.224] Playing a violin, -olin,
[01:27.823] Playing a violin.
[01:30.043] (This verse faster)
[01:31.267] She weighted her brother down with stones,
[01:34.722] She weighted her brother down with stones,
[01:36.634] And sent him off to Davy Jones,
[01:38.711] All they ever found were some bones,
[01:42.565] And occasional pieces of skin, of skin,
[01:47.364] Occasional pieces of skin.
[01:50.915] One day when she had nothing to do,
[01:55.104] One day when she had nothing to do,
[01:57.522] She cut her baby brother in two,
[01:59.759] And served him up as an Irish Stew,
[02:03.560] And invited the neighbours in, -bours in,
[02:06.993] Invited the neighbours in.
[02:11.623] And when at last the police came by,
[02:15.983] And when at last the police came by,
[02:18.249] Her little pranks she did not deny,
[02:21.299] To do so she would have had to lie,
[02:24.793] And lying she knew was a sin, a sin,
[02:28.505] Lying she knew was a sin.
[02:31.767] (This verse faster)
[02:34.206] My tragic tale I won't prolong,
[02:38.600] My tragic tale I won't prolong,
[02:40.849] And if you do not enjoy my song,
[02:43.998] You've yourselves to blame if it's too long,
[02:48.280] You should never have let me begin, begin,
[02:51.767] You should never have let me begin.
[02:55.799]