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When I was younger I used to wonder |
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If I would sail across the sea |
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Dressed like a soldier |
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And sleep beneath the trees |
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Schooldays were contemptible |
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Me girlfriend sported boils |
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Though rarely far presentable |
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Me hair was kept well oiled |
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Now I've got whiskers size ten blisters |
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Sgt Major Busby has a phonograph |
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He entertains his fellow men with tea |
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He often bellows dirty words |
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His waxed mustache is quite absurd |
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Ain't it barmy join the Army |
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"Hands off cocks and on wiv socks!" He said to me |
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The very first day I joined the volunteers |
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And though it sounds remarkable I'm stationed in Sebastapol |
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What a caper bless my maker |
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When I was younger I used to wonder |
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If I would sail across the sea |
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Dressed like a soldier |
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And sleep beneath the trees |
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Cause lately it's debatable if I'm alive and well |
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Me thirst has been insatiable |
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Like a banshee out of hell |
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Now I've got bunions big as onions |
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Colonel Upshot Baggley wears a petticoat |
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(No he don't, No he don't) |
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He entertains his fellow men with tea |
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Often finding light relief |
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With a red face batman underneath |
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Ain't it barmy join the army |
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"Hands off cocks and on wiv socks!" He said to me |
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The very first day I joined the volunteers |
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And though it sounds remarkable I'm stationed in Sebastapol |
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What a caper bless my maker |
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Private 89436271 received his final discharge yesterday |
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The only thing he said to me was |
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"Don't go sleeping under trees!" |
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Ain't it baaarmy |
