Dear Slim, I wrote you but you still ain't callin'
I left my cell, my pager
And my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn
You must not have got 'em
It probably was a problem
At the post office or somethin'
Sometimes I scribble addresses
Too sloppy when I jot 'em
But anyways fuck it
What's been up man, how's your daughter?
My girlfriend's pregnant too
I'm out to be a father
If I have a daughter, guess what I'm a call her?
I'm a name her Bonnie
I read about your Uncle Ronnie too, I'm sorry
I had a friend kill himself over some bitch
Who didn't want him
I know you probably hear this everyday
But I'm your biggest fan
I even got the underground
shit that you did with scam
I got a room full of your posters
And your pictures man
I like the shit you did with Ruckus too
That shit was fat
Anyways I hope you get this, man
Hit me back just to chat
Truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Stan
Call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore
And you can say that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did before
You're not sorry, no, no, no, no
Dear Slim, you still ain't called or wrote
I hope you have the chance, I ain't mad
I just think it's fucked up, you don't answer fans
If you didn't want to talk to me
Outside the concert you didn't have to
But you could've signed an autograph for Matthew
He's only 6 years old
We waited in the blistering cold for you
For 4 hours and you just said "No"
That's pretty shitty man
You're like his fuckin' idol
He wants to be just like you man
He likes you more than I do
Remember when we met in Denver
You said if I write to you, you would write back
See I'm just like you in a way
I never knew my father neither
He used to always cheat on my mom and beat her
I can relate to what you're sayin' in your songs
So when I have a shitty day
I drift away and put 'em on
Cause I don't really got shit else
So that shit helps when I'm depressed
I even got a tattoo
With your name across the chest
Sometimes I even cut myself
To see how much it bleeds?
It's like Adrenaline
The pain is such a sudden rush for me
See everything you say is real
And I respect you 'cause you tell it
My girlfriend's jealous
'Cause I talk about you 24/7
But she don't know you like
I know you Slim, no one does
She don't know what it was like?
For people like us growing up
You've gotta call me man
I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose
Sincerely yours, Stan
P.S. We should be together too
Call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore
And you can say that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did before
You're not sorry, no, no, no, no
Dear Mister, I'm too good to call or write my fans
This'll be the last package I ever send your ass
It's been six months and still no word
I don't deserve it?
I know you got my last two letters
I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you
I hope you hear it
I'm in the car right now
I'm doing 90 on the freeway
Hey Slim, I drink a fifth of vodka
Ya dare me to drive?
You know this song by Phil Collins
'From the air in the night'
About that guy who could have saved
That other guy from drowning?
But didn't, then Phil saw it all
Then at his show he found him
That's kinda how this is
You could have rescued me from drowning
Now it's too late
I'm on a thousand downers, now I'm drowsy
And all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know
I ripped all your pictures off the wall
I loved you Slim, we could have been together
Think about it, you ruined it now
I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope your conscious eats at you
And you can't breathe without me
See Slim, "Shut up bitch!
I'm trying to talk"
Hey Slim, that's my girlfriend screaming in the trunk
But I didn't slit her throat I just tied her up
See I ain't like you
'Cause if she suffocates she'll suffer more
And then she'll die too
Well gotta go
I'm almost at the bridge now
Oh shit! I forgot!
How am I supposed to send this shit out?
You had me falling for you honey
And it never would've gone away, no
You used to shine so bright
But I watched all of it fade
So you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore
And you can say that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did before
You're not sorry, no, no, no, no
No no no