Hard times, hard times, hard times, hard times When the college professor has no class And the quarterback would rather pass And the pump jockey complains of gas It's hard times, hard times When the taxi driver, he can't hack it And the tennis player can't stand the racket When allies refuse to pack it, it's hard times Hard times, hard times, real hard times When the elevator can't find the floor And the doorman, he can't find the door When they give to the rich what they take from the poor It's hard times Seems your money's gone before it's spent If you're not busted then you're badly bent To give it away doesn't make any sense, it's hard times Hard times, hard times, real hard times, hard times Now grandma forgets how to knit And the wise man has lost his wit And my tailor feels unfit It's hard times, hard times When the fashion model's lost her poise And Santa Clause smashes all the toys When boys could be girls, and girls could be boys, it's hard times Hard times, hard times, real hard times, hard times When the clock on the wall's got no time for jokes And Kreskin says, \"It's all a hoax\" When the Surgeon General chain smokes It's hard times When the truck driver don't wanna truck And the hockey player won't touch the puck And the rock musician don't wanna fool around, it's hard times Hard times, hard times, real hard times Harder times, hard times I was talking to this lady the other day And she was telling me [unverified]