Hi,my name's Chandler. I just moved in next door. 你好，我叫钱德，刚搬到对面
Would you like to battle me in a post-apocalyptic world... 想不想跟我在后末日世界
for control of the galaxy's last remaining energy source? 争夺银河系仅存的能源？
Sure,neighbor! Come on in! 好啊，请进
Is Janine around? 吉宁在吗？
She's at dance class. 她去上舞蹈课
Can I check my room? 我可以看看她的房间吗？
Don't go through her stuff. She gets really mad. 可以，但是别翻她的东西 她会发飙
Oh,my God! 天哪
It's like a guy never lived in here. 一点男人住过的痕迹都没有
You gotta be careful. This girl thing is dangerous. It's spreading. 小心，这个女性风格很危险 它已经扩散了
It is? 是吗？
Is this your pretty pink pillow on the couch? 这个粉红小抱枕是你的吗？
Is that your tiny little box that's too small to put anything in? 那个什么都不能装的小盒子呢
Okay, this is not good. You are a guy,okay? 没错，情况很不妙 你是男人，好吗？
This is a "guy's" place. 这是个男人的家
Soon,you'll be soaking your fingers in stuff. 你一旦失去自觉 就会开始修指甲
And your head's gonna be under a big, brown, drying, big, drying.. It's not good. 你会上美容院烘头发… 事情很严重
-You're right. I'll talk to her. -Talk to her. Be a man! 你说得对，我会找她谈 找她谈，做个男子汉
-I'm a man. -Defend yourself! 我是男子汉 保护你自己
We have to hem the new dust ruffle. 钱德，快点，要缝新的除尘布
Be right there,sweetums. 我马上过去
Totally different situation. 情况完全不同
The One With Ross' Teeth 本集播出：“黑人牙膏效果”

Hey,guys. 你们好
-How was breakfast with Hillary? -Okay. 跟希拉蕊吃饭吃得怎样？ 还好
She's still depressed because she broke up with her boyfriend. 她还是有点为了失恋而沮丧
Is this Hillary, your hot assistant chef, Hillary? 就是你的性感二厨希拉蕊吗？
The one that stares at me when I come in? 没错 我每次进去都盯着我的那个？
The one who looked at you once because you got in her way. 是你挡路而看过你一眼的那个
Still, I could tell. She was into me. 我还是看得出来她对我有意思
Why don't you set us up? 你帮我们安排一下嘛
Are you setting Ross up with someone? Does she have a wedding dress? 你要帮罗斯找对象？ 她有婚纱吗？
Come on,I'm serious. 摩妮卡，我是说真的
Okay, I'll do it, but as long as you promise you won't marry her. 没问题，只要你保证不娶她
Fine,I.. What if she's the one? 好，我… 如果她是我的真爱呢？
Man,you have a problem. 你真的有毛病
Rachel? 瑞秋
I'm making up flyers to try to get new massage clients. 我在做传单找新客人
Can I come to Bloomingdale's and use the copier? 我可以去布鲁明戴尔影印吗？
Sure, but they might think it's weird since I don't work there anymore. 可以，但他们会觉得奇怪 因为我已经离职了
Oh,my God! What happened? 天哪，怎么回事？
I got a job at Ralph Lauren. 我跳槽到罗夫罗兰了
Well, that's great! Congratulations! 太好了，恭喜你
A year ago. 1年了
You've lasted all year! Good for you. 你撑了1年，很好
You could still use the copier where I actually work. 你还是可以去我现在的公司印
But come by at lunch so my boss doesn't see you. 午休时间来，免得我老板看到
Kim will freak out. She doesn't like me. 否则金会发飙 她本来就不太喜欢我
-I don't think my boss likes me. -I don't think mine likes me. 怪了，我的上司也不喜欢我 我的也是
Maybe it's a universal thing. 或许这是共通现象？
Maybe because you're all hanging around here at 11:30 on a Wednesday. 又或许现在是上班时间 你们却在这里打混
Let's head off to work. 上班去吧
-Thank you. -Sure. 谢谢 不客气
You will not believe this. 说了你一定不信
I was making copies, and Ralph Lauren came in. 我在影印室影印时 罗夫罗兰走了进来
Oh,my God. Did you talk to him? 天哪，你有跟他说话吗？
A little. He seems really nice. 一点点，他人蛮好的
-Good kisser. -What? 吻功超棒 什么
What? 什么？
-You kissed him? -Totally. 你亲了他？ 没错
Phoebe, are you serious? 真的还假的？ 真的
He came in and introduced himself. 我在里面，他进来自我介绍
The next thing I know, we're making out! 然后我们就亲热了
Phoebe,you do know he's married? 菲比，你知道他已婚吧？ 不知道
Phoebe. 菲比
I'm supposed to ask every guy I make out with if he's married? 难道每次跟男人亲热都要先问
No, yeah, I should. 我是该问
Hey, Joey. 乔伊
Can I talk to you for a second? There's a kid in this picture. 可以跟你谈一下吗？ 照片里这个小孩
Do you know this kid? Is it a relative? 你认识么 他是你的亲戚吗？
No. I just thought it was cute. 不是，我只是觉得很可爱
That's what I was afraid of. Okay.... 我就怕这样，好
I really want you to feel at home here,but... 吉宁，我希望你住得愉快 不过...
some of this new stuff, it's too girlie. 你有些东西太女孩子气了
Like what? 像什么？
Like this. Pictures of cute babies we don't know. 像这个 不认识的可爱宝宝的图片
We can't have that. 我们不能挂这种东西
Joey, it's Anne Geddes. She's a famous artist. 那是安吉帝斯，她是名艺术家
I don't know this baby. I don't know if she's a famous artist or not. 我不认识这个宝宝 我不知道她是不是名艺术家
I don't want to be a jerk, but you're changing too much around here. 我不想刁难你 但你做的改变太多了
I'm sorry. I wanted to make the place a little nicer. 对不起 我只是想让家里舒服一点
But it's too much stuff. 但是也太多了
You know, you got the candles and the "foofy schmoofer" thing here. 你摆了蜡烛和那个什么东西
Over here, you got a picture of a watering can. 这里还有一幅花沥的画
I just thought.. 我以为…
I'm sure it's a famous watering can. 我相信这个花沥一定很有名
But come on. 但是拜托啦
And what is with the really hot stick in the bathroom? 浴室那个很烫的棒子是什么？
It's a curling iron. 那是整发器
Well,that's okay then. 那就没关系
Okay, my towels, for instance. I come into the bathroom... 像我的浴巾，我走进浴室
and my towel is not on the floor, where I keep it. 我的浴巾却不在地板上
It's up here on some hook. And it smells different. 而是挂在钩钩上 味道也不一样
-It's clean. -It feels different. 它变干净了 摸起来也不一样
It's dry. 它变干了
All right, I can make my peace with the clean, dry towels. 好吧，我可以接受干净的浴巾
Also what is with these chips you bought? 还有这些碎片是怎样？
It's potpourri. You're supposed to smell it. 不，那是干燥花，是用来闻的
Well, that's like summer in a bowl. 好像夏天被放在碗里
Kim,hi. 金，你好
I handed in that marketing report, and I never got to hear what you thought. 我一直不知道 你对我的行销报告的看法
I didn't read it. 我没看
The spring line's really gonna be great this year, huh? 今年的春装一定很棒吧？
对
I hear Ralph Lauren fooled around with someone in the copy room. 听说罗夫罗兰在影印室 跟某人亲热
Tell me everything. 从头说起
Hey,guys. 你们好
What's up? 怎样啊？
You know.... 就是…
Oh,my God. 我的天哪
What happened to your teeth? 你的牙齿怎么了？
I whitened them. 我漂白了
Really? 是吗？
What do you think? 你们觉得呢？
I think I shouldn't look directly at them. 我觉得我不该直视它
Come on, seriously. 我是说真的
-They're really, really, really white. -What was wrong with your old... 也白得太夸张了 你的...
human teeth? 人类的牙齿呢？
I did leave the gel on a little longer than it said to. 我的确把漂白胶上得比较久
-How much longer? -A day. 久多久？ 1天
Tonight is your date with Hillary. 你知道今晚要跟希拉蕊约会吧
I know. That's why I did it. Are they really that bad? 知道 所以我才漂白牙齿 真的有那么糟吗？
You'll be fine. Hillary's blind, right? 不会，放心好了 希拉蕊是瞎子吧？
She will be after tonight. 过了今晚就是了
Oh,Rach. Do you notice anything..? 瑞秋，你有没有发现…
Your teeth? Yes, I saw them from outside. 你的牙齿？我在外面就看到了
You guys are never gonna believe this... 说了你们绝对不信
but Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren. 菲比跟罗夫罗兰亲热
-What? -Oh,my God! 什么？ 我的天哪
She ran into him at my office, and they just made out. 她去我的办公室 然后他们就亲热了
The craziest thing is, now my boss likes me because... 最扯的是我因此赢得老板欢心
it's the best gossip she's heard all year. 她说这是这一整年最棒的八卦
I am proud of all my friends today. 我今天真以我的朋友们为荣
I can't believe Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren. 菲比居然跟罗夫罗兰亲热
I'm so jealous! 真是忌妒死了
Hi,I'm Chandler, your live-in boyfriend. 我是钱德，你活生生的男朋友
Chandler, please. Come on. 拜托，
Look at him. 你自己看
Well,I am no woman, but that is one tasty dish. 我不是女人 不过他还真秀色可餐
Here. 拿去…
Who's the silver fox? 那个银发老帅哥是谁？
That is your make-out buddy. Don't you recognize him? 那是你的亲热对象 你不认得吗？
Oh,wait. 等等…
"Phoebe, I love you. Kiss me, please." 菲比我爱你，吻我
That's not Ralph Lauren. It sounds like him,though. 那才不是罗夫罗兰 不过声音有像
-What? -Ralph doesn't look like that guy. 什么？ 罗夫跟他一点也不像
He's young, and he's got long hair and a beard and a Hacky Sack.. 他很年轻，长发落腮胡 背个大包包
Oh,my God. That's not Ralph Lauren. That's Kenny the copy guy! 天哪，那不是罗夫罗兰 那是影印小弟肯尼
What? 什么？
I told my boss that someone made out with Ralph Lauren. 完了，我还跑去告诉我老板
If she finds out that I lied to her, she'll hate me even more. Phoebe! 要是她发现我骗她 一定会更讨厌我，菲比
Why would the copy guy say he's Ralph Lauren? 那个小弟为什么自称罗夫罗兰
To get you to make out with him! 好骗你跟他亲热啊
This will make them look less white. 也许这件能压住你的白牙
Nope. 不行
Colors that don't work are... 好，没有用的颜色有
blue,yellow,green,red,black, white,orange and purple. 蓝黄绿红黑白橘和紫
Do you wanna try this highlighter again? 要不要再涂一次亮彩液？
No,I think it poisoned me a little. 不要，我有点反胃
The date starts in an hour. What am I'm gonna do? 离约会只剩1小时 我该怎么办
Maybe if your skin was lighter, your teeth wouldn't look so bright. 要是你的肤色白一点 牙齿就不会那么显眼
Oh,great! So all I need to do is get some new skin. Thank you. 太好了，所以我去换肤就行了 谢谢你
If we put just a little bit of makeup on you.. 我是说你可以化一点妆
Whoa!
We're not 13 anymore. 我们已经不是13岁了
This is the only thing left that has a shot at working. 只剩这个可行的办法
Won't she notice I have makeup on? 她不会发现我有化妆吗？
Half the guys out there have makeup on. 拜托，半数的男人都有化妆
What? 什么？
Half the people.. I mean.. Just try it and see. 半数的人，你就试试看嘛
I am not putting on makeup. 不要，我死也不化妆
Hello? Ross, could you put up some of these flyers for me? 太好了 罗斯，帮我帖几张传单好吗？
No! Demon! Demon! 魔鬼！魔鬼！
Our drawers will smell nice, and we didn't waste these pantyhose. 这样抽屉就会香香的 旧裤袜也没浪费
God forbid we throw out old underwear. 是啊，扔旧内衣会遭天打雷劈
You know what? I'm gonna go over to Joey's. 我要去乔伊那边
We've got to organize the wrapping paper. 我们还要整理包装纸抽屉
I've really gotten in touch with my feminine side enough today. 对，但我今天已经够女性化了
In fact, we're two sachets away from becoming a lesbian couple. 再缝两个香氛袋 我们就要变成女同志了
This has been a girlie day. You're right. I'm sorry. 今天的确很女孩子气 你说得对，抱歉
I just feel like I need to be in a "guy" place... 不会，我只是想去男人的家
do kind of a "man" thing. 做男人做的事
You go over to Joey's and... 没错，去乔伊家吧
drink some beer and hammer up some dry wall. 去乔伊家喝啤酒槌墙壁
When guys hang out, they don't just drink beer and hammer up dry wall. 男人并非只会喝酒槌墙壁
When girls hang out,we don't have pillow fights in our underwear. 女生也不会穿内衣打枕头仗
I'm sorry. We do. 对不起，我们会
I don't know why I said that. 我不知道为什么说不会
Hey,Chandler. 钱德
Come on in. We're knitting potholders. 进来，我们在织隔热手套
No,thanks,Josephine. 不了，乔瑟芬
Ross,I was wondering if.. 罗斯，我想说…
Oh,my God! Where are all the men? 天哪，男人都死哪去了？
-Hi,Kim. -Hi,Rachel. 金 瑞秋
Remember what happened yesterday? Well,it didn't happen. 记得我昨天说的事吗？ 其实没那回事
You didn't cancel the fabric order? 你没有取消台湾的布料订单？
Okay,two things didn't happen. 好，有两件事没那回事
Remember I told you someone made out with Ralph Lauren? 我不是说有人在影印室 跟罗夫罗兰亲热？
Well,it turns out that's not true. 结果是假的
It's not true? That's interesting. 是假的？那就好玩了
Because I checked. Only one keycard was used to access the copier... 因为我去查过 昨天午休时间...
yesterday during lunch, and that keycard belonged to you. 刷卡进影印室的 只有你一个
You think I made out with him? 不…天哪，你以为我跟他亲热
Listen to me... 听着
sleeping with Ralph is not gonna get you my job. 要是你以为跟罗夫上床 就能坐上我的位子，你就错了
I don't want your job. I don't. 我不想坐你的位子，真的
This is a mistake. I didn't make out with him. 这真是天大的误会 我没跟他亲热，
Nobody made out with him. I didn't use my keycard yesterday. 没人跟他亲热 我昨天没用我的卡
I don't even know how to use my keycard. 我连刷卡都不会
-Hi,Ralph. -Hi,Kim. 罗夫 金
Yeah. Nothing happened. 是啊，没跟他亲热
You could cut the sexual tension in here with a knife. 刚才的情欲张力一触即发
After that, what could I do except become a chef? 之后我也只能去当厨师
Soon,I hope to open my own restaurant. 我将来想自己开餐厅
You're a really great listener. 你很善于倾听
Most guys I go out with, they talk and talk. 我交往过的男人多半讲个不停
It's like, "Shut your mouth." You know? 听到后来真想叫他们闭嘴
I've been talking too much. Why don't we talk about you? 我说太多了，来聊聊你吧
Come on,I want to know. 说嘛，我想知道
Okay. I'm from Long lsland. 好，我是长岛人
I came to the city for college. 来纽约念书
I have a 5-year-old son, and in my spare time... 我有个5岁的儿子 平常...
I like to read spy novels. But let's talk more about you. 喜欢看看谍报小说 再来聊聊你吧
If you sear the stems of the flowers first in a frying pan... 很棒的是如果先把花茎底部 在平底锅上烤一下
your arrangement will look fresh much longer. 花就能开得更久
Joey, that is such a great tip! 好棒的小秘诀
Monica, I need to talk to the girl with the flowers. 摩妮卡，请你出去一下 我有事找那位插花的女士
Okay, but I'm gonna teach you how to make a bird feeder... 乔伊，你待会过来，我教你
out of a pine cone and some peanut butter. 用松果和花生酱做喂鸟器
I love birds. 我最喜欢鸟了
What is the matter with you? 你是怎么搞的？
-What? -You're arranging flowers! 什么？ 你在插花
You got dead flowers! 你放枯掉的花
You've got a picture of a baby dressed like flowers! 你挂扮成一朵花的宝宝照片
This is not Joey! 这不是乔伊
Look,I am still Joey, okay? 我还是乔伊，好吗
Flowers,they're just nice to look at. 花只不过是很好看
And that happens to be a picture by a famous artist of a famous baby. 那是一个名摄影师照的 宝宝也很有名
You're turning into a woman. 你正在变成女人
No,I'm not. 我没有
Why would you say that? That's just mean. 你怎么这么说？ 好恶劣喔
Now I've upset you? What did I say? 我惹你生气了？我说了什么？
It's not what you said. It's the way you said it. 不是你说了什么，是你的口气
Oh,my God! 天哪
I'm a woman! 我是女人
So now she thinks that I made out with him to get her job. 现在她觉得我跟他上床 好把她踢下去
-Why didn't you just tell the truth? -I did. 你怎么不跟她说实话？ 我说了
She doesn't think anyone would confuse Kenny the copy guy with Ralph Lauren. 但是她觉得不会有人蠢到 把影印小弟当成罗夫罗兰
What if Kenny were the real brains behind the whole company? 如果肯尼才是公司的首脑呢？
What if Kenny hired that Ralph guy to be the pretty front man,huh? 搞不好罗夫罗兰只是个门面
Did she ever think of that? 她想过吗？
You were with Kenny today. 你今天跟肯尼约会了吧？
Just for a second. 只有一下下
Phoebe, what am I gonna do? 菲比，我该怎么办？
The only thing you can do. Sleep with him. 你只好跟罗夫罗兰上床了
I'm not gonna sleep with him. I mean, I could, but I wouldn't. 我才不跟罗夫罗兰上床 我可以，但是我不会
Sleep with Kenny. 跟肯尼上床
-That wouldn't help me. -Oh,yes,it would. 那样对我也没好处 好处可大了
I've had a really good time tonight. 今晚真的很开心
I rarely connect with someone this much on the first date. 我很少第一次约会 就这么心有灵犀
Me neither. 我也是
I've had a really good time too, you know. 我也很开心
Are you gonna eat that bread? 你要吃那块面包吗？
I just like the smell. 我只是喜欢闻
You make me laugh. 你好好笑
Would you like to move to the couch? 要不要去沙发上坐？
Maybe I'll just turn down the lights a little? 我把灯光调暗一点好了
How about all the way? 干脆关灯如何？
Okay. 好
Wow,cool poster. 好酷的海报
Or should I say, "groovy poster"? 还是要说好抢眼的海报
So...
where were we? 刚才聊到哪里？
Are those your teeth? 那是你的牙齿吗？
You can see them,huh? 你看得见是吧？
Yes. They're insanely white. 对，白得很吓人
I did that for you. 我特地为你漂白的
What's the matter with you? 你有毛病吗？
What's the matter with me? You've got a black light. It's 1999! 我有毛病？你还装黑光灯 都1999年了
Oh,good. Kim,hi. 太好了，金
Hi,Rachel. I wanted to ask you,have you seen the new Ralph Lauren sheets? 瑞秋，我一直想问你 你看过新的罗夫罗兰床单吗？
What am I thinking? Of course you have. 我在想什么，你当然看过
Okay,look. 好
I'm sorry that I lied to you before. 很抱歉之前对你说谎
You were right. Ralph and I were an item, but we're not anymore. 你猜得没错 罗夫和我交往过 但已经结束了
Oh,really? 是吗？
Yeah,he dumped me. 对，他甩了我
He said, "Rachel, I can't do this. 他说“瑞秋，我不能这样”
Even though you're a very,very... “虽然你真的...
very beautiful woman... 很美很美”
I can't do this. I'm married and I'm sorry." “我不能这样” “我有家室，对不起”
But he said, "And you will never get promoted... 然后不知为何他又说 “你永远也不会升职”
especially not above Kim, who is an integral cog... “尤其不可能高过金” “她是罗夫罗兰体系”
in the Ralph Lauren machine." “不可或缺的重要人物”
You expect me to believe.. 你以为我会相信…
-Hi,Ralph. -Hi,Kim. 罗夫 金
Oh,my God. 天哪
He gave you the coldest look I've ever seen. It's like he hates you! 他看你的眼神好冷酷 仿佛对你恨之入骨
Then it is true! 所以是真的罗
Of course it's true. And it hurts so bad. 当然是真的，我好难过
Oh,honey,come here. 过来，
Oh,it'll be okay. 你会没事的
We've all been there. 大家都一样
You and Ralph? 你和罗夫？
Kenny the copy boy. 影印小弟肯尼
“献给盖儿约瑟夫”
-I need to talk to you. -What's the matter? You upset? 我有事要说 怎么了？你心情不好？
Would you like me to get a pint of ice cream and two spoons? 要不要分一桶冰淇淋？
No,no,no ice cream. Look.... 不…不要冰淇淋
We gotta get rid of all this girlie stuff in here. 我很抱歉 我们得把这些女生的东西扔掉
I gotta be a man! 我得当个男人
The living room has to remain a guy place,okay? 客厅必须维持男人的风格
That's the way it has to be. 就是这样
I'll just put it all in my room. 既然如此，我就拿回我房里
Good. Great. 好 很好
Thanks for being so understanding. 谢谢你的谅解
I didn't want to make a big deal out of this. 我不想搞得很难看
But you could put the picture of the famous baby in my room. 宝宝的照片可以挂在我房里
I mean,if you want to. 如果你要的话
Okay. 好
And maybe the watering can there. 花沥的画也可以
Sure. 好
And a couple of these little tiny boxes. 还有一两个小盒子
Joey, do you want me to put it all in your room? 乔伊，要不要都放到你房里？
Okay. 好吧