Guys,look! Ugly Naked Guy's putting stuff in boxes.
I'd say our naked buddy is moving.
Ironically,most of the boxes seem to be labeled "Clothes." 讽刺的是大部分的箱子 都标示着“衣服”
I'm going to miss that big old squishy butt.
And we're done with the chicken fried rice. 鸡肉炒饭没了
If he's moving,maybe I should try to get his place! 如果他要搬走 我可以去把那里租下来
It would be so cool to live across from you guys. 好主意 跟你们遥遥相对多好玩啊
We could do that telephone thing... 那我们就可以玩电话游戏
...where you have a can, we have a can... 你一个罐子，我们一个罐子
...and it's connected by a string. 中间有一条线
Or we could do the actual telephone thing. 或者我们也可以打真的电话
He's got packing tape stuck to where you really don't want it. 糟糕，他的第三点黏到胶带了
Get it off,fat man! Get it off! 快撕掉啊，肥仔
Oh,no,he's trying to pull it off slowly. 糟糕，他想慢慢撕下来
Take it from me,if you're gonna pull tape off yourself,it's gotta be in one quick motion. 相信我，撕胶带一定要快狠准
Like that. 就像那样
The One Where Everyone Finds Out 本集播出：“尔虞我诈”

Oh,my God. I love this apartment! 天哪，我爱死这层公寓了
Isn't it perfect? 很完美吧？
I can't believe I never realized how great it is! 我居然没发现这里有这么棒
Because your eye goes to the big naked man.
It's amazing! 太棒了
Hurry up with an application, or I'll beat you to it. 你最好赶快去申请 否则我会抢先
Well,I'm going to use Ugly Naked Guy's bathroom.
Look! There's Monica and Chandler. 你看，是摩妮卡和钱德
Hey,you guys! Hey. 喂，你们好，喂
Chandler and Monica! 钱德和摩妮卡
Oh,my God! 天哪
钱德和摩妮卡！
Oh,my eyes! 我要瞎了！
My eyes! 我要瞎了
It's okay! 菲比，没事的
-They're doing it! -I know! 不！他们搞在一起 我知道
-I know! -You know? 我知道 你知道？
Yes,I know it. Joey knows, but Ross doesn't,so stop screaming! 对，我知道，乔伊也知道 但罗斯不知道 所以你别再叫了
What's going on? 怎么了？
-What? -Nothing! 怎么了？ 没事
We are so excited that you'll get this apartment! 我们只是好兴奋你要搬来这里
Looks really good. 这里的确很棒
Looks pretty good! 非常棒
Get in here! Come on! 快过来啊
中央咖啡馆
You mean whenever Monica and Chandler... 你是说每次摩妮卡和钱德
...were doing laundry or going grocery shopping? 去洗衣服或买东西或....
The time Monica spent on the phone with Linda from camp? 她每次跟伤心的琳达讲电话
Doing it,doing it,phone,doing it.
I can't believe it! 真不敢相信
I think it's great. For him. 真是太好了…对男方来说
She could do better. 女方可以有更好的对象
Hey,you guys. 你们好
Come here! What? 乔伊，快过来 怎样？
Phoebe found out about Monica and Chandler. 菲比发现摩妮卡和钱德的事了
You mean how they're friends and nothing more? 就是他们是朋友，如此而已？
Joey, she knows. 不，乔伊，她知道了
We saw them doing it through the window.
Actually,we saw them doing it up against the window. 应该说是靠着窗户在做
We saw them fornicating. 我们看到他们私通
So they know you know, and they don't know that Rachel knows? 他们知道你知道 但是不知道瑞秋知道？
Yes,but it doesn't matter who knows what. 对，但现在这些都不重要了
Now enough of us know that we could just tell them we know. 我们有三个人知道 就可以告诉他们了
All the lying and the secrets will finally be over. 我再也不必为了保密而说谎了
Or,we could not tell them we know, and have a little fun. 或者我们也可以不告诉他们 自己来找点乐子
What do you mean? 什么意思？
If they say they are doing laundry, we'll give them laundry to do. 譬如每次他们说要洗衣服 我们就给他们一堆衣服洗
I would enjoy that. 我喜欢
You know what would be even more fun? Telling them. 你知道怎样更好玩？ 告诉他们
-That doesn't sound like fun. -So we'll make it fun. 听起来不好玩 那就让它变好玩
We'll do it like a barbershop quartet! 我们可以学理发店四重唱
We know,we know,we know 我们知道…
No,I want to do Phoebe's thing. 不，我想照菲比的做法
I can't take 我没办法再…
You don't have to do anything. Just don't tell them we know. 你只要别说我们知道就行了
No. I can't take anymore secrets. 不要，我没办法再保密了
I got your secrets,their secrets, secrets of my own. 我有你们的秘密，他们的秘密 还有我自己的秘密
You don't have any secrets. 你才没有秘密
Well, you don't know about Hugsy, my bedtime penguin pal. 是吗？你就不知道 我有个企鹅抱枕叫抱宝
How are we going to mess with them? 所以…我们要怎么耍他们？
You could use your position as the roommate. 你可以利用室友的身分
And I would use the strongest tool at my disposal. 我就运用我最大的本钱
My sexuality. 我的性感
Hello,children. 孩子们
Watch. Learn. And don't eat my cookie. 仔细看，学着点 别吃我的饼干
That jacket looks great on you. 你穿这件外套真好看
-Really? -The material is so soft. 是吗? 这个料子摸起来好软…
Hello,Mr. Bicep. 二头肌先生
You're working out? 你有在健身吗？
I try to squeeze things. 我有在挤牙膏
Are you okay? 你还好吗？
If you really want to know 如果你真的想知道
I can't tell you this. 我不能告诉你
You can tell me anything. 菲比，你什么都可以告诉我
Actually,you are the one person I can't tell this to. 事实上我就是不能告诉你
And the one person I want to the most. 但我又最想告诉你
What's going on? 怎么了？
I just haven't been with a guy in so long... 因为我很久没跟男人在一起了
...and sometimes you're looking for something... 有时你一直寻寻觅觅
...and it's right there in front of you,sipping coffee.... 却没发现他就在你眼前喝咖啡
Oh,no. Have I said too much? 我说太多了吗？
Just something to think about. I know I will. 总之你考虑一下，我就会考虑
You are so cute. 你好可爱
How did you get to be so cute? 你怎么会这么可爱？
My grandfather was Swedish. 我爷爷是瑞典人
And my grandmother was a tiny little bunny. 我奶奶其实是只拇指兔
Now you're even cuter. 你变得更可爱了
-You know,that is a popular opinion today,I must say. -What? 这简直是今天的民意 什么？
The weirdest thing happened at the coffeehouse. 今天在咖啡馆有一件怪事
I think Phoebe was hitting on me. 我觉得菲比在钓我
What are you talking about? 你在说什么？
I'm telling you I think Phoebe thinks I'm foxy. 是真的，菲比觉得我很有魅力
It's not possible. 不可能
I'm sorry,Phoebe's just always thought you were charming... 抱歉，只是在菲比眼中
...in a sexless kind of way. 你的迷人是无性的
You know,I can't hear that enough. 这种话真是百听不厌
I'm sorry, I just think you misunderstood her. 抱歉，你应该误解她的意思了
No, I didn't,okay? She was all over me. 我没有误解，好吗？ 她只差没扑上来
She touched my bicep, for crying out loud. 她还摸我的二头肌尖叫
This bicep? 这个二头肌？
Well,it's not flexed right now. 是我现在没挤它
Why is it so hard for you to believe that Phoebe could be attracted to me? 为什么你这么难相信 菲比对我有意思？
It's not. 我没有啊
All the girls are attracted to you. 女生都会对你有意思
You're part bunny. 你有拇指兔的血统
Mon, What are you doing now? you want to come see a movie with us? 摩妮卡，你要干什么？ 要不要一起去看电影？
Actually,I was going to do some laundry. 事实上我正要去洗衣服
Want to do it with me? 钱德，要不要一起去？
Sure,I'll do it with you. 好啊，我跟你一起去
Okay,great. Hold on a second. 太好了，等一下
Here you go. 拿去
That would really help me out a lot. Thanks. 不介意吧？这样我就轻松多了 谢谢
You know what? I don't have enough quarters. 我的硬币应该不够
I have quarters! 我这里有
Great. Now we can do laundry all night. All night laundry! 太好了 我们可以洗一整晚的衣服了
Hey,any word on the apartment yet? 罗斯，公寓申请得怎样？
I called there,and it turns out Naked Guy is subletting it.
He's already had 100 applicants. 而且已经有一大堆申请者
-Oh,man. -No,no,it's okay. 没关系
Because you know what the difference between them and me is? 我跟他们的差别是…
Your history of bedwetting? 你有尿床的历史？
Hey,I trusted you,man! 你怎么可以说出来
Anyway,the difference is... 总之差别是...
...I've got the edge. 我占了优势
It's not exactly ethical, but I sent him a bribe... 我知道这样有点奸诈 但我送了点东西...
...to tip the scales in my direction. ...去贿赂他
You can see it from the window. 从窗户搞不好看得到
-Is it that pinball machine with the big bow on it? -No. 是那个打了蝴蝶结的弹珠台吗 不是
-That new mountain bike? -No. 那辆新的登山车？ 不是
What did you send? 那你送什么？
A basket of mini muffins. 一篮小英式松饼
There's a whole table of them. Which one did you send? 但桌上全都是小英式松饼 哪一篮是你送的？
The small one. 小的那一篮
You actually thought that basket was going to get you the apartment? 什么？你真以为那篮松饼 能帮你争取到公寓？
Someone sent us a basket at work, and people went crazy over those muffins. 对，我们办公室曾经收到一篮 大家都爱得不得了
It was the best day. 那天真的很高兴
Your work makes me sad. 你的工作让我觉得好悲惨
Oh, man, I want that place so much! 真是的，我好想要那层公寓
And I was so sure that was going to work. 我还以为一定会成功
There's 12 bucks I'll never see again. 那12块算是丢到水里了
We'd better go if we want to catch that movie. 菲比，想看电影就得快了
Bye. 再见
Bye, Chandler. I miss you already. 钱德再见，我已经开始想你了
Did you see that? The inappropriate, and the pinching? 你看到她嗲哩嗲气还捏我吗？
Actually,I did. 我看到了
So do you believe that she's attracted to me? 你相信她对我有意思了吧？
Oh,my God! She knows about us! 天哪，她知道我们的事了？
Are you serious? 真的还假的？
She knows,and she's trying to freak us out! 菲比知道了，她想吓我们
That's the only explanation! 这是唯一的解释
But what about my pinchable butt and my bulging biceps?
She knows! 她知道了
Joey! 乔伊
Yeah? 怎样？
Phoebe knows about us. 菲比知道我们的事了
I didn't tell them! 我没告诉她们
Them? 她们？
Who's "them"? 她们是谁？
Phoebe and Joey. 菲比和乔伊
Joey! 乔伊
And Rachel. 和瑞秋
I would have told you, but I promised not to tell. 我想告诉你们 但她们逼我不能说
I'm sorry. 天哪 对不起，
But it's over now,right? 那现在没事了吧？
You can tell them you know they know, and I can go back to knowing nothing! 你们可以告诉她们你们知道了 我就可以恢复我状况外的本色
Unless 除非…
Not "unless"! This must end now! 没有除非，现在就要了结
They think they are so slick messing with us. 她们还自以为高明
But they don't know that we know that they know. 她们不知道我们知道她们知道
So 所以…
The messers become the messees! 没错，耍人的变成被耍的
Come on, you guys. Think how much fun it would be to tell. 拜托啦，说出来多好玩
We know,we know,we know 我们知道…
What? 什么？
Oh, that wasn't you. 对喔，你们不知道
Honey,you got to stop torturing yourself. 不 罗斯，别再折磨自己了
Why don't you find another apartment? 你去找别的房子嘛
I've already looked at 1000 apartments this month. 我这个月已经看了上千个房子
None of them even compares to that one. 没有一间比得上那一间
Well,except for one,but I would have had to share it with an Armenian family. 有一间不错但是我得跟 一家亚美尼亚人一起住
Grandma really liked me. 那个奶奶很喜欢我
But I want Ugly Naked apartment!
You know what you should do? 你知道你应该怎么做？
You should find out his hobbies and use that to bond with him. 你应该找出他的嗜好 拿来跟他套交情
Like if I wanted something from Joey... 例如我对乔伊有所求
...I would strike up a conversation about sandwiches... 我就会聊…三明治
...or my underwear. 或是我的内衣
I'm listening. 我在听
That is a great idea! 看吧 好棒的主意
And I know Ugly Naked Guy because we've been watching him for five years.
So that gives me back my edge! 所以我又重新占了上风
Let's see now. He had the trampoline. 好，他有一张跳床
He broke that. 被他跳坏了
-He had gravity boots. -He broke those too. 他有一双重力靴 也被他穿坏了
So he likes to break stuff. 所以他喜欢破坏东西
I've got to go pick up Ben. But I will figure something out. 好，我得去接班 不过我会想出来的
Didn't he used to have a cat? 他之前不是有一只猫？
I wouldn't bring that up. It would bum him out. 别提那个，会害他心情不好
Poor cat never saw that big butt coming.
喂？
Hold on a second, she's right here. 在，等一下，她就在旁边
It's Chandler. 钱德找你
Hello,you. 你好
Phoebe, I've been thinking about you all day. 菲比，我一整天都在想你
You know that thing you said before? I was intrigued. 你之前的提议 说我不心动是骗人的
Really? 是吗？
Joey won't be here tonight. 对，乔伊晚上不在
Why don't you come over? I'll let you feel my bicep. 你要不要过来 我让你摸我的二头肌
Or maybe more. 甚至是别的地方
I'll have to get back to you on that. Okay, bye. 我待会再给你答覆，再见
He wants me to come over and feel his bicep and more! 天哪，他找我去摸他的二头肌 和别的地方
-Are you kidding? -No! 不会吧？ 是真的
I cannot believe he would do that to Mon 他居然背着摩妮卡…
Joey? Do they know that we know? 乔伊，他们知道我们知道吗？
-No. -Joey! 不知道 乔伊
They know you know. 他们知道你们知道了
I knew it! 我就知道
I would say,"Thank God! Everybody knows! It's finally over!" 我本来会说：谢天谢地 大家都知道了，总算没事了
But that hasn't been working for me. 但每次说都没用
I cannot believe those two! 那两个人真扯
They thought they could mess with us? Trying to mess with us? 他们以为他们可以耍我们 想耍我们是吧？
They don't know that we know they know we know. 他们不知道我们知道 他们知道我们知道了
Joey,you can't say anything. 乔伊，你不能说
Couldn't if I wanted to. 我也不想说了
Good evening,sir. I'm Ross Geller. I'm one of the applicants. 你好，我是罗斯盖勒 我也申请要租你的房子
I realize that the competition is fierce but.... 我知道竞争很激烈，但是…
I'm sorry, I can't help but notice that you're naked. 抱歉，我注意到你光着身体
I applaud you. 我为你鼓掌
Man,I wish I was naked. 我也好想光着身体
I mean,this looks so great. 看起来好舒服
That is how God intended it. 这正是上帝造人的本意
Look. They're panicked! 你看她们多慌
They'll totally back down. 她们绝对会退缩 没错
If he wants a date, he's going to get a date. 好，他敢约我就敢去
I'm going to go in. 我要过去了
Be sexy. 性感一点
Please. 拜托
I'd love to come by tonight. 钱德，我晚上可以过去
Really? 真的？
Absolutely. Say,around 7? 当然，就7点吧？
Yes. 好
Good. I'm really looking forward to you and me having sexual intercourse. 很好 我很期待跟你发生关系
Hey,check it out! 快来看！
Naked Guy's got a naked friend.
Oh, yeah. 真的
Oh,my God! That's our friend! 天哪，那是我们的朋友
It's Naked Ross! 是罗斯
Would you like another mini muffin? 你还要小英式松饼吗？
Try the blueberry,they're delicious. 吃吃看蓝莓口味，很好吃
Showtime! 上场罗
-Rachel,get me perfume. -Ok. 瑞秋，拿香水来 好
Joey, can you get me a bottle of wine and glasses? 乔伊，帮我拿一瓶酒两个酒杯
All right,thanks,but glasses that do not have handles and that are glass. 谢谢，但我要的是 没把手的玻璃杯
And wine that is not olive oil. 我要酒不要橄榄油
You just make her think you want to have sex with her and it will freak her out. 放心好了 只要让她以为你想跟她  她绝对会吓到
How far am I gonna have to go with her? 我到底得撑到什么程度？
Relax, she'll give in way before you do. 别紧张，她会比你先投降
How do you know? 你怎么知道？
Because you're on my team. My team always wins. 因为你跟我同一队 我这一队总是赢
At this? 赢这种事？
Just go get some! Go! 总之去吓她，快去
Now,I'm going to try to listen from right here. 好，我会站在门外听 好
Oh,wait. 等一下
Good idea. 好主意
Don't give away the farm. 等等 别把料都爆光了
菲比
Come on in. 钱德 进来吧
I was going to. 我正要进去
I brought some wine. Would you like some? 我带了酒来，你要吗？
Sure. 好啊
So here we are. 总算要开始了
Nervous? 紧张吗？
Me? No. You? 我？不会，你呢？
I want this to happen. 不会，这样正合我意
So do l. 我也是
I'm going to put on some music. 我去放点音乐
Joey likes to scare the duck. 乔伊喜欢吓鸭子
Maybe I'll dance for you. 我跳舞给你看好了
You look good. 你真美
Thanks. 谢谢
You know,when you say things like that,it makes me... 你说这种话 让我...
...want to rip that sweater vest right off. 好想扯掉你的毛衣背心
Why don't we move into the bedroom? 不如进房里再说吧？
Really? 真的吗？
Do you not want to? 你不想吗？
First I want to take off all my clothes... 不是，只是我想先脱掉衣服
...and have you rub lotion on me. 让你替我擦乳液
That would be nice. 听起来不错
I'll go get the lotion. 我去拿乳液
It's way out of hand. She wants me to put lotion on her! 情况完全失控了 她要我帮她擦乳液
-She's bluffing! -She's not backing down. 她在唬你 她没打算放弃
She went like this 她还这样
He's not backing down. He went to get lotion. 他没打算放弃，他去拿乳液了
It's Chandler. You can take him. 他是钱德，你可以搞定他
Come on. Don't you remember when you made him cry using only your words? 还记得你曾经把他骂哭吗？
Aren't you guys done yet? 真是的，你们还没好吗？
I want to sit in my chair! 我想坐我的椅子
The sooner Phoebe breaks him,the sooner it's over and out in the open. 乔伊，菲比一突破钱德的心防 这一切就结束公开了
I like that. 我喜欢
Show him your bra. He's afraid of bras. Can't work them. 我知道，让他看你的胸罩 他怕胸罩，他解不开
Joey! 乔伊
You didn't rip off any buttons. 你没把扣子都挑开
It's not my first time. 老经验了
Go back there and seduce her till she cracks! 你给我回去，色诱她让她屈服
Give me a second. 好，等一下
-Did you clean up in here? -Of course! 你打扫过吗？ 当然！
You're going? 你要走了？
Not without you,lover. 除非你跟我走，爱人
So this is my bra. 这是我的内衣
It's very,very nice. 很好看
Well,come here. 过来
I'm very happy we're going to have all the sex. 我很高兴我们要睡觉了
You should be. I'm very bendy. 你是该高兴，我的身体很柔软
I'll kiss you now. 我要吻你了
Not if I kiss you first. 除非我先吻你
I guess there's nothing left for us to do but kiss. 接下来就只能接吻了
Here it comes. 终于来了
Our first kiss. 我们的初吻
You win! 好，你赢了
I can't have sex with you! 我不能跟你上睡觉
-And why not? -I'm in love with Monica! 为什么？ 因为我爱摩妮卡
You're what? 你什么？
Love her! That's right！ 没错，我爱她
I...LOVE...HER! 我，爱她
I love her! 我爱她！
I love you,Monica. 我爱你，摩妮卡
I love you too,Chandler. 我也爱你，钱德
I thought you were doing it. I didn't know you were in love! 我以为你们只是搞在一起 我不知道你们相爱
Dude! 兄弟
Hats off to Phoebe. Quite a competitor. 向菲比致敬，强劲的对手
May I say your breasts are still showing. 此外你的胸部还晾在外面
God. 天哪
All right! So that's it? 就这样
It's over. Everybody knows! 结束了 大家都知道了
Actually,Ross doesn't. 罗斯还不知道
We'd appreciate it if no one told him yet. 对，请你们先别告诉他
Well,here it is. 就是这里
A new place for a new Ross. 新罗斯的新家
I'll have you and the guys from work over, once it's furnished. 我一布置好就请你和同事来坐
I must say it's nice to see you back on your feet. 很高兴看到你重新振作
I am that, and the whole rage thing is definitely behind me. 我是振作了 脾气暴躁的事都过去了
I wonder if it's time for you to rejoin our museum team? 你是不是该回馆里上班了？
That would be great. 那就太好了
I am totally ready to come back to work. I... 我已经准备好重回岗位，我…
What? No! 什么？不
What are you doing? 你在干什么？
Get off my sister! 别压着我妹妹