[02:41.-2]She'd feel like we're ganging up on her.
[05:45.-3]And not just at the fun stuff, but,like,talking too.
[10:02.-4]I'm looking. I'm looking.
[10:21.-2]-That's sweet. -I knew you had Rockys. -
[14:06.-3]...and your underpanty things. …
[15:46.-3]You know what else? He's unbelievable in bed!
[17:25.-3]The first time I had to cook for myself after Carol left me
[19:43.-3]-l' m out of here! -Wait! -
[22:34.-3]Thank you. I could not have done this without you.
[22:58.-4]-Does it still hurt? -Yeah.
[00:01.51]Let it go. It's not a big deal.
[00:04.05]Not a big deal? It's amazing. You reach in,there's one maneuver and bam!
[00:09.19]A bra. Right out the sleeve.
[00:11.82]As far as I know,guys don't do anything that comes close. Right?
[00:16.80]Come on! You guys can pee standing up.
[00:20.10]We can? Okay,I'm trying that.
[00:24.00]Know what blows my mind?
[00:25.87]Women can see breasts anytime they want.
[00:31.21]You look down, and there they are.
[00:33.71]How you get any work done is beyond me.
[00:37.65]I don't get how guys can do so many mean things...
[00:41.45]...and not even care. …
[00:49.63]-Multiple orgasms! -There you go.
[00:57.44]The One With the East German Laundry Detergent
[01:45.52]Saturday night. The big night!
[01:47.59]Date night! Saturday night. Saturday night!
[01:52.92]-No plans,huh? -Not a one! -
[01:56.03]Not even breaking up with Janice?
[01:58.33]Right,right. Shut up.
[02:02.53]Chandler,nobody likes breaking up with someone.
[02:05.74]Except for Kevin Millmore, may he rot in hell.
[02:09.87]-You just gotta do it. -I know. But it's just so hard. -
[02:13.78]You're sitting there with her. She has no idea.
[02:16.92]You finally get up the courage to do it.
[02:19.65]There's that awkward moment when you've handed her the note.
[02:26.12]You try to run out of the restaurant before she's finished the note.
[02:31.23]Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man. Just stop calling.
[02:38.57]If you want,I'll do it with you.
[02:44.64]You dump Janice, I'll dump T ony.
[02:47.65]-You're breaking up with T ony? -He's sweet,but it's not fun anymore. -
[02:52.25]I don't know if it's me or his hunger strike,I don't know.
[02:57.79]Do you want anything else?
[02:59.62]You had a nutty,chocolate-y, kind of cake-y,pie thing that
[03:05.56]Nothing. I' m fine.
[03:09.90]What's wrong? Why so scrunchie?
[03:12.54]My father wants to give me a Mercedes convertible.
[03:16.67]That guy,he burns me up.
[03:20.15]Yeah,it's a Mercedes if I move back home.
[03:23.55]It was horrible! He called me "young lady. "
[03:26.65]I hate when my father calls me that.
[03:30.19]Did he say "You' re not up to this" again?
[03:33.66]I got the extended version with choruses of...
[03:36.86]... "You'll Never Make it on Your Own. " …“
[03:43.84]Hi,Joey.
[03:46.40]Oh,my God! Angela!
[03:47.94]Wow! Being dumped by you agrees with her.
[03:51.34]-Are you gonna go over there? -No. Yeah. No.
[03:56.75]Okay,but not yet. I don't wanna seem too eager.
[04:02.65]One Mississippi,two Mississippi...
[04:05.69]...three Mississippi. That seems pretty cool. …
[04:12.06]-Hey,Angela. -Joey. -
[04:14.87]You look good.
[04:16.57]That's because l' m wearing a dress that accents my boobs.
[04:27.15]You don't say.
[04:30.22]So,Rachel,what are you doing tonight?
[04:33.12]Big glamour night. Me and Monica at Launderama.
[04:38.12]You wanna hear a freakish coincidence? Guess who's doing laundry there too?
[04:44.30]-Who? -Me!
[04:46.50]Was that not clear?
[04:51.74]Why don't...?
[04:53.27]Why don't I just join you both there?
[04:56.61]Don't you have a laundry room in your building?
[05:00.78]Yes.
[05:03.08]I do have a laundry room in my building.
[05:08.09]But there's a rat problem.
[05:10.79]Apparently,they're attracted to dryer sheets.
[05:14.26]They're going in fine, but they're coming out all fluffy.
[05:21.93]-Anyway,7-ish? -Sure.
[05:27.61]-Forget it. I' m with Bob now. -Bob? Who the hell's Bob? -
[05:32.58]Bob is great. He's smart, sophisticated,and he has a real job.
[05:37.55]You go on three auditions a month and you' re an actor. Bob
[05:41.55]Come on! We were great together.
[05:52.73]Sorry,Joey. You said, " Let's be friends. " So guess what?
[05:57.44]-What? -We' re just friends. -
[06:00.07]Fine. Fine.
[06:01.74]Why don't the four of us have dinner tonight? As friends.
[06:05.74]What "four of us"?
[06:07.31]You and Bob, and me and my girlfriend...
[06:12.68]... Monica. …
[06:13.89]I' m telling you, this guy's perfect for you.
[06:16.85]Forget it! Not after your cousin who could belch the alphabet.
[06:21.56]Come on,this guy's great. His name's Bob. He's Angela's...
[06:25.66]... brother. He's smart, he's sophisticated... …
[06:29.33]...and he has a real job. …
[06:31.34]I go on three auditions a month and say l' m an actor,but he's
[06:35.57]-God help us. -What? -
[06:37.24]Ugly Naked Guy is laying kitchen tile.
[06:43.61]Look,l' m asking a favor here.
[06:46.22]If I do this for her brother, maybe Angela will come back to me.
[06:51.09]What's going on? You go out with tons of girls.
[06:54.56]I know,but Angela's different.
[06:57.90]She's like one of a kind, like a snowflake or....
[07:05.00]-Something else like a snowflake? -Yeah,yeah. -
[07:08.81]Look,I made a huge mistake. I never should've broke up with her.
[07:13.58]Will you help me? Please?
[07:23.62]Hold on a sec. You need to not touch any of those.
[07:28.49]Okay,bye.
[07:30.73]Monica's not coming. It's just gonna be me and Rachel.
[07:36.57]Hold on,camper. You've thought this through?
[07:39.90]It's laundry. The thinking-through is minimal.
[07:44.21]Just you and Rachel? Just you two?
[07:46.54]This is a date. You're going on a date.
[07:50.65]-Uh-uh. -Uh-huh.
[07:56.39]-I haven't done that in a while. -ls it a date if she doesn't know? -
[08:01.69]Yes,absolutely. Saturday night,all rules apply.
[08:06.80]What are you saying? I should shave again? Pick up some wine?
[08:10.77]Well,you may wanna rethink the dirty underwear.
[08:15.47]It's the first time she'll see your underwear. You want it dirty?
[08:23.88]No.
[08:26.72]And the fabric softener?
[08:29.09]Okay,now what is wrong with my Snuggles?
[08:33.49]What? It says I'm a sensitive, warm kind of guy.
[08:37.23]You know,like a little fuzzy bear.
[08:41.90]-I'll pick something else up. -There you go. -
[08:49.07]Thank you.
[08:50.27]What does Bob look like? Is he tall,short?
[08:54.15]Yep.
[08:56.75]-Which? -Which what?
[09:00.69]-You've never met Bob,have you? -No,but
[09:04.32]-For all we know,he's horribly -Hey,Joey! -
[09:08.83]Horribly attractive. I'll be shutting up now.
[09:17.17]Where are they? Where are they?
[09:19.67]This is nice. We never do anything,just the two of us.
[09:23.57]Great. Maybe tomorrow we can rent a car,run over some puppies.
[09:28.31]I don't wanna do that.
[09:32.32]-Here we go. -Have a good breakup. -
[09:36.69]-Hey,Janice. -My God,I am so glad you called me. -
[09:40.63]I had the most supremely awful day.
[09:45.10]That's not good.
[09:47.87]Can I get an espresso and a latte over here?
[09:51.14]We got the proofs from the shoot with the vegetables. They sucked.
[09:55.51]I blew off the afternoon. I went shopping.
[09:58.78]And I got you....
[10:05.32]I' m looking.
[10:08.15]-I got you -What?
[10:09.69]-What? -What did you get me there?
[10:13.66]I got you...
[10:16.56]...these. …
[10:18.80]Bullwinkle socks.
[10:23.63]You can wear Bullwinkle and Bullwinkle or Rocky and Rocky,or you can mix.
[10:29.27]Moose and squirrel. Whatever you want.
[10:37.21]I'm gonna get another espresso. More latte?
[10:43.05]No,l' m still working on mine.
[10:50.93]-That's it? -Yeah,it was really hard. -
[10:53.90]-Yeah,the hug looked pretty brutal. -You weren't there. -
[11:01.84]-Sorry. -How are things going? -
[11:04.61]Going? Things are not going. She got me socks.
[11:08.08]These go with your Rockys. She really cares about you l' m sorry.
[11:26.30]Coming through. Move. Move!
[11:33.84]Excuse me! I was kind of using that machine.
[11:37.51]Yeah,well,now you' re kind of not.
[11:41.08]But I saved it. I put my basket on top.
[11:44.22]I'm sorry. Is that your basket?
[11:46.92]It's pretty. Unfortunately,I don't see suds!
[11:52.42]What? 什么?
[11:54.63]No suds,no save,okay?
[12:00.67]What's going on?
[12:02.33]Nothing. This horrible woman just took my machine.
[12:06.37]Was your basket on top?
[12:08.11]-Yeah,but there were no suds. -So?
[12:10.61]-You know,no suds,no save. -No suds,no Excuse me. -
[12:14.55]Hold on a second! This is my friend's machine.
[12:18.75]Hey,hey,hey! Her stuff wasn't in it!
[12:21.19]Hey,hey,hey! That's not the rule,and you know it!
[12:35.67]All right. Show's over.
[12:40.34]Nothing to see here.
[12:44.88]Okay. Let's do laundry.
[12:47.21]That was amazing! I can't even send back soup.
[12:51.25]Well,that's because you' re such a sweet,gentle....
[12:58.02]Do you? Do you? Oh,hey. You must need detergent.
[13:05.86]-What's that? -Uberweiss. -
[13:08.77]It's new. It's German. It's extra tough!
[13:14.17]Rach,are you gonna separate those?
[13:17.78]Oh,God. Am I being a total laundry spaz?
[13:22.68]Am I supposed to use one machine for shirts and another for pants?
[13:30.22]Have you never done this before?
[13:33.46]Well,not myself. But I know other people that have.
[13:38.46]Okay. You caught me. I'm a laundry virgin.
[13:43.00]Don't worry. I'll use the gentle cycle.
[13:50.84]Basically,you wanna use one machine for all your whites.
[13:55.75]A whole other machine for your colors.
[13:58.42]And a third for your...
[14:03.12]...delicates. That would be your bras... …
[14:11.60]These are white cotton panties.
[14:14.83]Would they go with whites or with delicates?
[14:17.94]That would be a judgment call.
[14:25.21]He's so cute!
[14:28.88]Where did you grow up?
[14:30.85]-Brooklyn Heights. -Cleveland. -
[14:34.55]-How'd that happen? -My God!
[14:36.79]What?
[14:38.69]I suddenly had the feeling I was falling.
[14:44.16]But I'm not.
[14:53.67]So,you and Angela,huh?
[14:56.11]-Yep. Pretty much. -You' re a lucky man. -
[15:01.15]Know what I miss most about her?
[15:03.61]That cute nibbly noise she makes when she eats.
[15:07.72]Like a happy little squirrel...
[15:10.69]...or a weasel. …
[15:13.92]-I never really noticed. -Oh,yeah,yeah. Listen for it. -
[15:18.66]Monica. Monica is great.
[15:20.93]Yeah,she is.
[15:23.40]But it's not gonna last.
[15:27.30]She's too much for me in bed.
[15:30.91]Sexually.
[15:35.58]I've gotta tell you,Bob is terrific.
[15:38.45]Yeah,isn't he?
[15:40.12]It's great to meet a smart,funny guy who's emotionally older than 8.
[15:53.56]My brother never even told me when he lost his virginity.
[15:59.90]That's nice.
[16:06.34]You can. It's like pulling off a Band-Aid.
[16:09.55]Just do it really fast, and then the wound is exposed.
[16:13.82]Go! Go!
[16:28.23]Hi,Janice.
[16:30.83]Here we go. I don't think we should go out anymore.
[16:41.81]All right.
[16:48.15]Well,there you go.
[16:50.39]Stop it,stop it,stop it.
[16:55.76]This isn't about you.
[16:57.56]I know! It's about your fear of commitment.
[17:01.13]I' m not afraid.
[17:03.10]-Please. -I don't!
[17:04.64]-I don't! I' m ready to commit anytime. -Really? -
[17:09.51]I know this is gonna sound stupid...
[17:12.04]... but I feel that if I can do this... …
[17:14.85]...if I can actually do my own laundry... …
[17:18.38]...there isn't anything I can't do. …
[17:21.35]That does not sound stupid to me.
[17:29.33]I'm sorry,that's all the time we have. Next on Ross....
[17:34.87]-Uh-oh. -What?
[17:36.43]Uh-oh.... Uh-oh,
[17:37.84]Uh-oh,the laundry's done.
[17:41.27]It's a song.
[17:44.14]The laundry song we sing.
[17:47.04]Uh-oh! The laundry's done Uh-oh!
[17:51.28]-What's the matter? -Nothing. -
[17:53.88]The laundry's done
[17:55.45]Come on,show me.
[17:56.82]It's just that you left a red sock with your whites,and now...
[18:03.53]...everything's kind of pink. …
[18:07.06]Everything's pink?
[18:08.83]Except for the red sock, which is still red.
[18:11.80]Don't be upset. It can happen to anyone.
[18:14.84]But it happened to me.
[18:16.94]God,I'm gonna look like a big Marshmallow Peep!
[18:20.74]What am I doing?
[18:22.85]My father's right! I can't live on my own.
[18:26.22]I can't even do laundry!
[18:40.20]Something went wrong with Underdog and they couldn't inflate his head.
[18:45.87]So anyway...
[18:48.71]...his head is flopping down Broadway,right? …
[18:52.61]And I'm thinking how inappropriate this is.
[18:58.05]Something's in my eye. Could we check it in the light,please?
[19:05.32]-Oh,my God! -What?
[19:07.02]Were we at the same table? It's like...
[19:10.13]...cocktails in Appalachia. …
[19:16.77]-They' re close. -Close? Her tongue's in his ear. -
[19:21.67]Like you've never got a little rambunctious with Ross.
[19:26.88]Joey,this is sick. It's disgusting. It's...
[19:31.42]... not really true' is it?
[19:33.35]Who's to say what's true?
[19:35.32]-What were you thinking? -l' m not proud of this,okay? -
[19:39.46]Well,maybe I am a little.
[19:45.03]You like him. I want her. He likes you.
[19:49.37]-Really? -Yeah. -Really? -Yeah.
[19:51.54]If we put our heads together, between the two of us...
[19:55.44]...we can break them up.
[20:00.34]I' m sorry. I can't believe I did this.
[20:03.01]I couldn't stop laughing at your Norman Mailer story.
[20:12.76]Waiter? One more plate of chicken wings over here.
[20:22.40]Here's the thing. We're different.
[20:24.84]I'm bing,bing,bing. You' re boom,boom,boom.
[20:28.44]Oh,my God! I' m so sorry!
[20:31.44]Are you okay?
[20:34.01]It's just my lens. It's my lens.
[20:36.85]I'll be right back.
[20:40.75]I hit her in the eye! In the eye!
[20:43.35]This is the worst breakup in the history of the world!
[20:47.09]Oh,my God!
[20:51.03]-How many have you had? -I don't know. A million! -
[20:55.73]Chandler,easy,easy. Go to your happy place.
[21:02.57]-l' m fine,l' m fine. -All right.
[21:05.11]-l' m not fine. Here she is. -Wait here,okay? Breathe. -
[21:28.03]-How do you do that? -It's like a gift. -
[21:34.27]We should always break up together.
[21:36.87]I'd like that!
[21:40.11]The clothes are clean. That's the important part.
[21:43.38]I guess. Except everything looks like jammies now.
[21:52.92]I'm sorry. Excuse me. We had this cart.
[21:57.39]I had a 24-inch waist. You lose things.
[22:00.30]Now,come on. Get out of my way.
[22:02.83]I' m sorry. Maybe I wasn't being clear. This was our cart.
[22:06.74]There weren't clothes in it!
[22:08.94]Hey,hey,hey,hey! Quit making up rules!
[22:11.78]Let go! Come on,it's my cart.
[22:15.38]Listen,Mitzi,if you want it...
[22:17.78]...you' re gonna have to take me with it!
[22:27.62]-Yes! Did you see that? -You were incredible. -
[22:31.23]A brand-new woman, ladies and gentlemen.
[22:45.21]More clothes in the dryer?
[22:49.25]-I'm fine. I'm fine. -Are you sure? -
[22:55.32]-Are you sure you' re okay? -Yeah. -
[23:02.56]What a neat idea! All your clothes match. I' m gonna do this.
[23:09.33]-How'd it go? -Excellent!
[23:11.94]We ripped that couple apart and kept the pieces for ourselves.
[23:17.17]What a beautiful story.
[23:21.38]-I'm fine,by the way. -I'm sorry. -
[23:24.61]-Where's Chandler? -He needed time to grieve. -
[23:27.82]I' m free! I' m free!
[23:32.12]That ought to do it.