The bar will soon be closing
and lights they´re all turned down
theres 3 girls in a corner booth
the fat one she´s passed out
her friends they called me over
And it turned out she was stuck
with the help of 4 big bouncers 
we put her in my truck
me & old Jack Daniels 
had been together most of the night
somehow he´d convinced me 
she was the prettiest thing in sight
I got her home I opened the door
and I rolled her to my bed
the lights came on she opened her eyes
and this is what she said........
wmmmm.......wmmmm ....wmmmmmmm 
wmmmm...wmmmm..wmmmmmmm..wmmm!
morning came, that sun was up & there to my surprise
was a big old girl with no clothes on 
and Oprah Winfrey thighs
I sat up & fear set in
I found we were alone
she said that she was hungry
whilst she was nibbling on a chicken bone
the words she said next scared me
and today the haunt me still
she said I hope you´ve got a steady job cowboy
I said why´s that sheila
she said I´m not on the pill thats why
I said oh!
with that in mind I tried to run
lord I tried to get away
she ran me down & hopped on top
and here´s all I could say
huh oh wmmmm. get off me......wmmmm ....wmmmmmmm 
wmmmm..ohh your crushing me.wmmmm..wmmmmmmm
get off ohohoh..wmmmahh get off me you Heffer!