Once a year my friend puts on a red suit And hangs around with me and my wife Now I can't help but feeling jealous Each time she climbs on his knee And she stands beneath the mistletoe screaming For him to stand beneath the mistletoe screaming Now I can't help but feeling jealous Each time she climbs on his knee Why must she climb on his knee? I saw my baby wearing Santa's beard She kissed him once and whispered in his ear I saw my baby wearing Santa's beard I wish he would go, he's breakin' up my home She always had this twisted side to her But she'd never drag my name around town But lately she's been humming cheatin' songs And I don't like that fat guy around No, I don't like that fat guy around I saw my baby wearing Santa's beard She kissed him once and whispered in his ear I saw my baby wearing Santa's beard I wish he would go, he's breakin' up my home I saw my baby wearing Santa's beard Trilling Christmas, trembling fear (Trilling, Christmas) I saw my baby wearing Santa's beard I wish he would go, he's breakin' up my home