My Roly Poly Girl - Jake Thackray
I've gone and lost my sweetheart
And I don't know where to look
Oh  she was big and she was bonny
And stap me vittles  she could cook
And I hanker for her lips
Oh  I hanker after her eyes
For her patties  for her chips
Her little whortleberry pies
Who took my cook  stole my
Roly Poly Girlie
Where must I look  and what
Have I got to do
By hook  by crook  I'll get him
By the short-and-curlies
Who took my cook   It better not be you
She was working down the butcher's
Baking little crusty pies :
When I saw her pretty chitterlings
I felt my juices rise
“Come  cook me my goose ” I cried
“braise me broccoli  boil me peas
Whip me a crab-apple mousse
And a glass of water  please ”
Who took my cook  stole my
Roly Poly Girlie
Where must I look  and what
Have I got to do
By hook  by crook  I'll get him
By the short-and-curlies
Who took my cook   It better not be you
Day by day  she did me dainties
For me  for nobody else :
What junketing  what jellies  oh
What winkles  what whelks
Oh  the eyes I use to make
Oh  the lips I used to lick
For her frothy fairy cake  her fairy cake
For her fluffy spotted dick
Who took my cook  stole my
Roly Poly Girlie
Where must I look  and what
Have I got to do
By hook  by crook  I'll have him
By the short-and-curlies
Who took my cook   It better not be you
But where  oh where's my sweeting now
Where  where am I to search
She upped and offed and left me and
My stomach in the lurch
Somebody else feasts on her hair
Somebody else drinks in her eyes
Getting more than his fair share
Of her gooseberry surprise
Who took my cook  stole my
Roly Poly Girlie
Where must I look   Wherever can she be
By hook  by crook  I'll have him by
The short-and-curlies
If you've got my cook  mate  you'll be
A damn sight fatter than me