Once a year my friend puts on a red suit And hangs around with me and my wife Now i can't help but feeling jealous each time she climbs on his knee And she stands beneath the mistletoe screaming For him to stand beneath the mistletoe screaming Now i can't help but feeling jealous each time she climbs on his knee Why must she climb on his knee? I saw my baby wearing santa's beard She kissed him once and whispered in his ear I saw my baby wearing santa's beard I wish he would go He's breaking up my home She always had this twisted side to her* But she'd never drag my name around town But lately she's been humming cheating songs And i don't like that fat guy around No, i don't like that fat guy around I saw my baby wearing santa's beard She kissed him once and whispered in his ear I saw my baby wearing santa's beard I wish he would go He's breaking up my home I saw my baby wearing santa's beard Thrilling christmas, trembling fear I saw my baby wearing santa's beard I wish he would go He's breaking up my home