作曲 : Gibb I was late getting to church on the morning of my ceremony Stayed up too late, the night before From fingering foreign dirty holes in the dark The morning sun blinded my eyes And made my skin look pale and tainted in light And there were steps to climb as I unloosened my tie As I began to walk the aisle The congregation looked behind but I continued past the pews And met my angel in a suit with a smile As I looked him in the eye, I heard my best friend cry We aren't fools to fall in love but let coupledom die Ban marriage, ban marriage The minister was drunk and high from His rewrite of holy verse with more lies But the organist she played With a tenacity and grace that was fine The whole room was filled with the thunder and flood With just one chord, the thrill and clarity of sound But soon the song went slowly dead And I was forced to take a stand on one side It was him or my fag hag, oh, well I guess, she was never that good of a friend After my fag hag friend had fled The minister looked mighty fed and content We said his rewritten vows that I could hardly pronounce But was soon drowned it out by that organ and the shout Ban marriage, ban marriage Ban marriage, ban marriage The congregation, stunned and dumbed Looked upon me with an innocuous stare I went down on my knees, I prayed that There be truth and there be light in my day In my hungover daze, I felt the thunder of God It was the orders that I take the wrath upon my own rod Then I repeated my own vows They were perverted and they smelled of myself That there is splendor in the harshness of bum That consummation makes a grumble And the sound that I have learned called Ban marriage, ban marriage Ban marriage, ban marriage Ban marriage, ban it all