作词 : Weird Al Yankovic
Yeah, a used pink bathrobe
A rare mint snow globe
A Smurf TV tray
I bought on 
E-BayMy house is filled with this crap
Shows up in bubble wrap
Most every day
What I bought on 
E-BayTell me why 
I need another pet rock
Tell me why 
I got that 
Alf alarm clock
Tell me why 
I bid on Shatner's old toupee
They had it on 
E-BayI'll buy your knick-knack
Just check my feedback"A plus plus" they all say
They love me on 
E-BayGonna buy a slightly-damaged golf bag
Gonna buy some 
Beanie Babies, new with tag
From some guy, 
I've never met in 
NorwayFound him on 
E-BayI am the type who is liable to snipe you
With two seconds left to go, whoa
Got Paypal or 
Visa, whatever'll please
As long as 
I've got the dough
I'll buy your 
Tchotchkes
Sell me your watch, please
I'll buy, 
I'll buy, 
I'll buy, 
I'll buyI'm highest bidder now
Junk keeps arriving in the mail
From that worldwide garage sale
Hey, A Dukes 
Of Hazard ashtray
Oh yeah, bought it on 
E-BayWanna buy a 
PacMan Fever lunchbox
Wanna buy a case on vintage tube socks
Wanna buy a 
Kleenex used by 
Dr. DreFound it on 
E-BayWanna buy that 
Farrah Fawcet poster
Pez dispensers and a toaster
Don't know why the kind of stuff you throw away
I'll buy on 
E-BayWhat 
I bought on 
E-Bay