Now, listen My paycheck after taxes barely pays the rent I do the town on Friday, by Tuesday, it's all spent Two bucks an hour, this job ain't too hip My love life's turning sour working the night shift It's the pits, it's a one way trip On a sinking ship Ain't it the pits, but you just can't quit When the scale won't tip or the key don't fit Two $6.50 tickets to hassle with the crowd I got hit with a Frisbee, the band played too loud I got all their records, man and loved all their hits But this is the worst, it's the pits Oh, you can't keep it lit then it sticks to your lip Oh, ain't it the pits when the record skips and the TV quitsYou're in deeper and deeper, you dig into the pit The climb is always steep, you can't get a lift Ain't it the pits, it's the bottom of the list It's all wing tips and double knits, it's the pits Slip out onto the freeway, down all the gears Things were just gettin' heavy when the red light appears He said, "Get outta the car, boy" He put the 'cuffs on my wrist, read me my rights Oh, things got intense I got 90 days in jail No one would go my bail, so there I sit, it's the pits When the waist line slips, 39 inch hips and your pants don't fit You're in deeper, you dig into the pit The climb is always steeper, they won't let you quit Ain't it the pits, P I T S, it's the pits When the the faucet drips, it won't never quit Oh, like a ten cent tip