[LYDIA:
I was just ten
Simple and sweet
Everywhere fellas would stare
Out on the street
And I felt used
Kinda confused
I would refuse to look in their eyes
But now I really love creepy old guys!
[ALL:
[BARBARA:
[DELIA:
[LYDIA:
[DELIA:
[LYDIA:
[DELIA & BARBARA:
[LYDIA:
[LYDIA:
[BARBARA:
[LYDIA:
[LYDIA:
[BETELGEUSE:
[LYDIA:
I'm so happy I could cry!
[BARBARA & DELIA:
[LYDIA:
[BARBARA:
[BARBARA & LYDIA:
[LYDIA:
[BETELGEUSE:
[LYDIA:
I am marrying my creepy old guy
[THE OTHERS:
[LYDIA:
[THE OTHERS:
[LYDIA:
For Armageddon
[BARBARA:
[DELIA:
[LYDIA:
Pick up some rice
Say something nice!
It's my day to shine
I'm getting hitched to my creepy old guy!
[BETELGEUSE:
[BARBARA & DELIA:
She's marrying a creepy old guy!
[CHARLES:
This is just like that, but fine!
[THE OTHERS:
Our faith has been renewed
Now love is alive!
[LYDIA:
I am walking down the aisle
I wanna see a tear in every eye as I pass by
I know that on the outside he's disgusting
And even on the inside, he's disgusting
But I know that this time, I'm makin' it right (Making it right, making it right!)
[LYDIA:
[BETELGEUSE:

O-M-G
Dressed to a "T"
Fancy and formal
I found me a wife
L'chaim! To life!
This is so normal!
I was ignored, but now, I'm adored!
'Cause I extorted, tortured, and lied
Give it up for my underage bride!
[THE OTHERS:
God be glorified!
[ALL (INCLUDING BETELGEUSE AND LYDIA):
[LYDIA:
Doesn't he deserve a chance at life?
[BETELGEUSE:
[LYDIA:
I am marrying my creepy old guy!
[THE OTHERS:
[BETELGEUSE:
[ALL: