They come from underneath the stairs Into my room but no-one cares They’re on the bus and on the train They’re knocking on my window pane Oh Mother telephone the nurse Can’t you see it’s getting worse I close my eyes yet still it seems Everybody in my dreams Gubba look-a-likes Gubba look-a-likes I wake up screaming in the hall I didn’t mean to wake at all I run and lock the bathroom door Turn on the taps and out they pour Through all the villages and towns A thousand sandy-coloured clowns I try and escape down private drives And then I reach the Readers’ Wives Gubba look-a-likes Gubba look-a-likes In order to fling off this curse, I spend all day drinking in diverse taverns, with smarmy acrobats and balding senators. But after a while they too adopt the likeness, and begin to breed like town pigs. As a drunken lump I fall into a state of blissful unconsciousness, but the moment is fleeting, and I awake once more in despair – and in my final agonies believe myself lost. Gubba look-a-likes… In every film and every play On every public right of way On every flag I see unfurled On all the grounds in all the world The one armed bandits in the bar In the back of every car And even on my dying day They’ll refuse to go away When I walk towards the light Something somewhere won’t be right And what was once my Uncle Keith Says there’ll never be relief And we’ll go on and on and on and on and on Gubba look-a-likes…