[00:00.000] 作曲 : Robert Lopez/Trey Parker/Matt Stone
[00:00.420]And now we wish to honour you with the story of Joseph Smith, the American Moses!
[00:09.288]Well, this is very good! Praise Christ!
[00:13.430]Mor-mon!
[00:17.376]I'm going to take you back in time! (Mormon)
[00:20.523]To the United States, 1823. (Mormon)
[00:23.948]A small and odd village called oopstate New York. (Oopstate)
[00:27.453]There was disease, and famine (So sick)
[00:30.820]But also in the village lived a simple farmer who would change everything
[00:35.884]His name was Joseph Smith
[00:40.759]Ha-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya
[00:44.568]Joseph Smith, American Moses!
[00:48.252]Praise be to Joseph! American prophet man.
[00:51.508]AY! My name is Joseph Smith, and I'm going to f*ck this baby!
[00:56.017](MISSION PRESIDENT: What?!)
[00:57.640]No no Joseph! Don't f*ck the baby!
[01:01.345]Joseph Smith, don't f*ck the baby.
[01:04.685]Suddenly the clouds parted,
[01:06.662]And Joseph Smith was visited by GOD!
[01:10.756]Joseph Smith, do not f*ck a baby.
[01:14.190]I'll get rid of your AIDS if you f*ck this frog.
[01:18.318]Ha-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya
[01:23.144]Joseph Smith f*cked the frog god gave him,
[01:26.175]And his AIDS went away!
[01:28.333]Then a great wizard named Moroni came down from the starship enterprise
[01:33.257]Joseph Smith! Your village is sh*t!
[01:37.351]You should lead the villagers to a new village.
[01:40.408]Take these f*cking golden plates (awaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay)
[01:44.365]And on the plates were written the directions to a new land.
[01:48.396]Sal Tlay Ka Siti (Sal Tlay Ka Siti)
[01:54.970]Joseph tried to convince all the villagers to follow him and his golden plates.
[02:00.143]Liberation! Equality! No more slavery for oopstate Mormon people!
[02:06.608]I got de golden plates! (Gold plates!)
[02:08.912]I gunna lead the people! (We head west!)
[02:11.427]We gotta stick together! (Mormons!)
[02:14.033]We gotta help each other! (We're Mormons!)
[02:16.273]And so we climb the mountain! (We head west!)
[02:18.757]And we cross the river (We head west!)
[02:21.243]And we fight the oppression! (Mormons!)
[02:23.722]By being nice to everyone (We're Mormons!)
[02:26.684]Not so fast Mormons! You shall not pass my mountain!
[02:30.626]Down from the mountain look who comes! The American warman, Brigham Young!
[02:34.165]YEEEEEEEES! I am Brigham Young!
[02:37.625]I cut off my daughter's cl*toris.
[02:39.780]That made god angry so he turned my nose into a clit for punishment!
[02:45.371](Brigham Young, his nose was a cl*toris)
[02:48.704]What will you do Joseph? Will you fight the cl*toris man?
[02:52.482]Not fight him, help him! (Oooohhhhhhhh)
[02:56.545]Joseph Smith took his magical f*ck frog and rubbed it upon Brigham Young's clit-face,
[03:02.403]And behold, Rigam was cured!
[03:07.328]Joseph Smith! Magical AIDS frog!
[03:10.486]Brigham Young! Frog on his clit-face!
[03:15.094]Brigham Young was so greatful, he decided to join the Mormons and their journey.
[03:21.561]Compassion! Courtesy!
[03:23.609]Let's be really f*cking polite to everyone!
[03:27.779]I got de golden plates! (Gold plates)
[03:30.059]I gunna lead the people! (We head west)
[03:32.533]We gotta stick together!(Mormons!)
[03:36.044]Now comes the part of our story that gets a little bit sad. (Ohhhhhhh)
[03:42.360]After travelling for so long,
[03:44.844]The Mormons ran out of fresh water,
[03:47.381]And became sick- with dysentery!
[03:52.019]Mormon go to de watah, watah go to de cup
[03:55.512]Cup go to de stomach, sh*t come out de butt
[03:58.970]Sh*t go in de watah, watah go in de cup
[04:01.555]Sh*t go down de stomach, sh*t come out de butt
[04:04.433]Oh f*ck!
[04:06.558]Oh no! The prophet Joseph Smith is now getting sick!
[04:11.719]Sh*t go in de watah, watah go in de cup
[04:14.281]Cup go to de thirsty, sh*t do to de stomach
[04:17.183]Blood come out de butt, blood go in de watah
[04:19.841]Watah go in de cup, cup go to de throat
[04:22.466]Sh*t blood in de stomach, sh*t blood in de mouth
[04:24.998]Sh*t blood on de insides, watah come out de butt
[04:28.215]Brigham Young, you must take the golden plates and lead the Mormons to the promise land!
[04:38.329]Despiration! Mortality! Loss of faith!
[04:42.217]Ahhhh...I got the golden plates (Gold plates)
[04:47.701]I gunna lead the people (We head west)
[04:50.087]Even though their prophet had died,
[04:52.262]The Mormons stuck together,
[04:54.189]And helped each other,
[04:55.729]And were really nice to everyone they came across.
[04:58.825]And then one day, the Mormons finally found,
[05:02.818]Sal Tlay Ka Siti! (Sal Tlay Ka Siti)
[05:09.606]And there, the Mormons danced with ewoks,
[05:12.750]And were greeted by Jesus!
[05:15.682]Welcome Mormons!
[05:18.294]Now, let's all have as many babies as we can,
[05:21.153]And make big Mormon families!
[05:24.385]Woohoo!
[05:29.001]F*ck your woman, f*ck your man,
[05:31.153]It is all part of god's plan
[05:33.387]Mormons f*ck all that they can,
[05:35.688]Here in Salt Lake City land!
[05:38.202]Thank you! Thank you, God! (Now we are f*cking)
[05:42.581]Thank you! Thank you, God! (God wants us f*cking)
[05:47.187]Thank you! Thank you, God! (Get back to f*cking)
[05:51.797]Thank you! Thank you, God!
[05:56.532]Joseph Smith, f*ck frog-
[05:58.078]Brigham Young, clit face-
[05:59.372]Sh*t come out da butt
[06:00.746]Jesus says f*ck, f*ck, Mormons!