[00:01.036]Immanuel Kant was a real pissant who was very rarely stable
[00:06.193]Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar who could think you under the table
[00:10.034]David Hume could out-consume Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel
[00:13.781]And Wittgenstein was a beery swine who was just as schloshed as Schlegel
[00:18.053]There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya'bout the raising of the wrist
[00:23.072]Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed
[00:28.441]John Stuart Mill, of his own free will on half a pint of shandy was particularly ill
[00:32.584]Plato, they say, could stick it away half a crate of whiskey every day
[00:36.401]Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle
[00:38.327]Hobbes was fond of his dram
[00:40.009]And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart
[00:41.852]"I drink, therefore I am."
[00:44.039]Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed
[00:49.105]A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he's pissed