[00:00.63]Nerd rap infests your internet. You left a trap, but it's empty.
[00:03.72]MC Frontalot took a gape but the bait wasn't tempting,
[00:06.51]ending up uncaged and at large
[00:08.49]to talk smack at you through the networking appliance that's in charge
[00:12.09]of every drip of your attention.
[00:13.44]Yo, when mine goes out I've got to log in just to mention
[00:16.11]my disappointment at the interruption of convenience.
[00:18.75]I mean just: a lot left, but none up in between this
[00:21.27]couple of minutes here and a couple of minutes later.
[00:23.67]It's an outrage, at the price I paid. These dictators
[00:26.73]of my leisure rule with an iron fist.
[00:28.80]Has anybody ever been so put upon as this?
[00:33.42]Your GPS run out of battery (first world problem)
[00:36.39]Got to wake up Saturday (first world problem)
[00:38.79]You just delayed a honeymoon (first world problem)
[00:41.16]Pledge season's coming soon (first world problem)
[00:43.68]Half your friend list is spam accounts (first world problem)
[00:46.26]And your center channel speaker's out (first world problem)
[00:54.00]Muffy, my hair regrowth cream is mostly ineffective
[00:57.15]and I'm struggling to keep this in perspective,
[00:59.04]but I feel like a massive injustice occurred.
[01:01.38]Says "regrows hair" on the tube (in the words)
[01:04.14]in a third — or maybe a quarter — of all users.
[01:06.66]I must have got swindled. Is it a fault? Of whose is?
[01:09.27]Oooh, Muffy, Muffy, I had all the servants tortured.
[01:11.61]Did you keep them on retainer? Do you got some more on order?
[01:14.04]'Cause I can't comb my hair on my own no more.
[01:16.59]I got accustomed to the lifestyle, sniffed upon the spore
[01:19.14]and it molded up my innards, made the blood turn blue.
[01:21.57]Muffy, Muffy, there's a revolution; what we're gonna do?
[01:26.82]Misplaced the Ambien (first world problem)
[01:29.07]Left a participle dangling (first world problem)
[01:31.86]You're scheduling your root canal (first world problem)
[01:34.14]Your grad schooling had no rationale (first world problem)
[01:36.93]You didn't like your appetizer (first world problem)
[01:55.23]Your yacht got capsized (a first world problem)
[02:00.75]Now while our capitalism is in a minor kerfuffle,
[02:09.75]you have to hustle. Before the fates come, reshuffle.
[02:12.42]Rustle up another couple grievances and air 'em.
[02:14.70]You can laugh about it later (maybe needed while despairing).
[02:17.25]For the moment though, you ordered half caf, didn't get it;
[02:19.74]there was no TV set when you jetted; internet resetted
[02:22.65]itself just as I was in the middle
[02:24.81]of tournament play, and so I suffered from transmittal
[02:27.54]interruption. Completely ruined my day.
[02:29.79]MC Frontalot's a jackass, that's all I'm trying to say.
[02:32.28]People buy CDs in these days of disaster,
[02:35.04]so poor me: I have to be a professional rapper.
[02:39.81]No bubbles in the soda cup (first world problem)
[02:42.45]App crashed when you loaded up (first world problem)
[02:45.24]Phone's OS is outta date (first world problem)
[02:47.73]Colors won't calibrate (first world problem)
[02:49.98]They never stock the snack you want (first world problem)
[02:52.41]Caught herpes from a celebutante (first world problem)
[03:00.00]Got wallhacked in PVP (first world problem)
[03:02.67]Oh no, HD-DVD (first world problem)
[03:05.49]Pixels aren't perfect square (first world problem)
[03:07.59]Your favorite rapper isn't debonair (first world problem)
[03:10.23]You own too many underwear (first world problem)
[03:12.66]And you're not much of a millionaire (first world problem)