Online
I work down at the pizza pit

And I drive and old Hundai

I still live with my mom and dad

I 5'3 and overweightI'm a Sci-fi fantatic
Mild athsmatic

Never been to 2nd base

But there's a whole nother me
That you need to see

Go check out MySpaceCause online I'm down in Hollywood

I'm 6'5 and I look damn good
I drive a Mazarati
I'm a black belt in Karate
And I love a good glass of wineIt turns girls on that I'm mysterious

I tell 'em I don't want nothing serious
Cause even on a slow day I can have a three way
Chat with two women timeI'm at one so much cooler online

So much cooler onlineI get home' I kiss my mom
And she fixes me a snack

I head down to my basement bedroom

And fire up the macIn real life' the only time I
Ever even been to LA

Was when I got the chance with the marching band
To play tuba in the Rose Parade.Online I live in Malibu
I posed for Calvin Kline' I've been in GQ
I'm single and I'm rich
And I got a set of six pack abs that'll blow your mindIt turns girls on that I'm mysterious
I tell 'em I don't want nothing serious
Cause even on a slow day I can have a three way
Chat with two women at one timeI'm so much cooler online

Yeah I'm cooler onlineWhen you got my kinda stacks' it's hard to get a date
Let alone a real girlfriend

But I grow another foot
And I lose a bunch of weight everytime I log in

Online I'm out in Hollywood
I'm 6'5 and I look damn good
Even on a slow day' I can have a three way
Chat with two women at one timeI'm so much cooler online

Yeah I'm cooler online

I'm so much cooler online

Yeah I'm cooler online