i know a fat old policeman
he's always on our street
a fat and jolly red faced man
he really is a treat
he's to kind for a policeman
he's never known to frown
and everybody says he's the happyist man in town
(laughing) （

the laughs apon duty
he laughs apon his beat
he laughs at everybody when hes walking in the street
he never can stop laughing
he says he has not tried
and once he did arrest a man
and laughed untill he cried
(laughing)（

his jolly face is wrinkeled
and then he shut his eyes
he opened his great mouth
is was a wanderus site
he said i must arrest you
he dint know what for
and then he started laughing
until he cracked his jaw
(laughing)（

so if you chance to meet him
when walking round the town
just shake him by his fat old hand
and give him half a crown
his eyes will beam and sparkel
he will gurgle with delight
and then you will start him laughing
with all his blessed might
(laughing)（