[00:09.88]The sky isn't blue, and the ocean's not grand
[00:11.82]And string theory is easy to understand
[00:14.46]The grass isn't green, and the sun isn't bright
[00:16.57]Healthcare will be resolved overnight
[00:19.39]The world isn't round, and the Buddha's not Zen
[00:21.37]And we both have really good taste in men
[00:23.80]And there really is a Black Forest land
[00:26.22]Where everyone gets all their ham...
[00:29.37]And I swear, I fuckin' swear
[00:34.04][01:31.26]I didn't Google you...
[00:37.17][01:36.80]Okay, I did, I admit it
[00:39.17]It was so easy to do
[00:41.64]7, 008 results
[00:44.29]And I know everything about you
[00:46.54]You're not a sex offender
[00:48.91]But you failed home ec in 1997
[00:51.37]It really isn't that weird
[00:53.72]Come on, we're all adults here...
[00:58.80][01:58.14][02:28.43]Everybody Googles each other
[01:00.42][01:59.96][02:29.87]Everybody does their Facebook research
[01:02.42][02:02.25][02:31.99]It's how we get to know one another
[01:04.92]To make sure that we don't get raped.
[01:07.14]I don't have any mental disorder
[01:09.00]And I don't spend my weekends watching "Law & Order"
[01:11.81]It takes forever to get in my pants
[01:13.86]This old-fashioned girl likes romance
[01:16.46]I am not fearful of being alone
[01:18.46]And Zack Morris had a really small phone
[01:21.19]Ring ring ring r-ring ring r-ring ring
[01:23.43]Cell phones in the '80s...
[01:26.76]And I swear, shit fuckin' swear
[01:38.99]And I know that you Googled me too
[01:41.17]How else would you have known
[01:43.83]That my dog contracted herpes?
[01:45.88]Sing it again, 'cause this melody
[01:48.36]Feels really good to sing
[01:50.63]Stop pretending it's taboo
[01:53.10]Like masturbation in the '50s...
[02:04.12]To make sure that you're not in porn.
[02:06.92]I do not mean to be jealous already
[02:08.76]But who is that girl in those pictures? She's pretty
[02:11.19]I think you may have dated her
[02:13.46]Or maybe she's your lesbian friend
[02:16.15]I see that you got really drunk on your birthday
[02:18.29]Was it sadness-related, or were you just thirsty?
[02:21.01]I do not mean to make judgments now
[02:23.21]But if we date, some things will have to change...
[02:34.17]To make sure that you don't have cats.