Homer:Look, Cameron's about to sing the song I wrote for him!
[00:00.63]Homer:Here you go, honey. Sing this!
[00:02.10]Lisa:how did you write a song so quickly?
[00:03.93]Homer:Much of the tune is plagiarized. Now go go go!
[00:08.19]Lisa:I've been to Paris and London
[00:10.94]And Tokyo town,
[00:13.73]But one crazy 'berg
[00:15.84]Has 'em all beat hands down.
[00:20.59]Sideshow Mel:Jacksonville?
[00:21.65]Lisa:I'm talkin' Springfield!
[00:23.28]You can buy chimichangas.
[00:24.91]Talkin' Springfield!
[00:27.92]The chicks with big gazongas?
[00:29.90]There's tires on fire,
[00:30.70]A guy named Apu,
[00:37.98]And Skinner and Grampa
[00:39.62]And old Disco Stu.
[00:41.95]Did I forget to mention you?
[00:44.20]Lenny:"You"? That's me!
[00:45.61]Lisa:I'm talkin' Springfield
[00:48.35]Where nobody sucks!
[00:53.97]Except for Flanders.
[01:01.50]Krusty:Awwwwww...I get it I get it! She's good! Looks like they love you, kid!
[01:06.53]And the audience is always right!
[01:09.17]I wish I could say the same thing about my stockbroker!
[01:13.42]Homer:Don't worry, honey. The song I wrote you is so shmaltzy,
[01:16.70]it'll make "Moon River" sound like a farting orangutan!
[01:21.54]Lisa:My kitty died
[01:24.45]On Christmas Eve.
[01:27.78]Daddy told me to be brave.
[01:33.93]But instead of singing carols,
[01:37.39]I was digging Snowball's grave.
[01:47.29]Lenny:Oh God, I miss Lisa's cat so much.
[01:58.62]Krusty:This is our final night! Thirty contestants have already fallen through our Buzz Cola trap door!
[02:07.95]Hey, you're supposed to clean this out every night! Whadaya mean "Talk to your chop stuey"?!
[02:14.84]Neh! Now, let's welcome the first of our two finalists: Lisa Simpson!
[02:24.39]Lisa:Ladies and gentlemen, I have a confession to make.
[02:27.33]I didn't have my usual songwriter tonight, so I took a stab at writing my own song.
[02:32.91]Something that expresses what's really in my heart. Bernie, if you please.
[02:39.12]I'm in the final two,
[02:41.55]I should be happy.
[02:44.77]But all I want to do
[02:47.33]Is spend more time
[02:49.73]With my pappy.
[02:53.68]Now that you're gone, Dad,
[02:56.27]I miss you so much.
[02:58.86]And your threats against teamsters
[03:01.74]And techies and such.
[03:04.77]Your management style
[03:06.79]Is like Attila the Hun.
[03:09.82]You were vicious, malicious,
[03:12.97]But you got the job done.
[03:16.30]I'm sorry I hurt you,
[03:19.25]Now please don't be sad.
[03:22.22]You're no longer my coach
[03:25.11]But you're always my dad.
[03:39.78]Homer:Ladies and Gentlemen, My Daughter, Lisa Simpson!
[03:49.15]Krusty: Even the Applause-O-Meter is crying. Ah. That's better. Oh! Ooh! OW!!
[03:53.30]He's about to learn the most important lesson in the music business:
[03:57.43]Don't trust people in the music business.
[04:01.79]Cameron:I'm a privileged boy,
[04:03.15]It's great, I gotta tell ya!
[04:04.84]Privileged boy,
[04:06.15]My dad can buy and sell ya!
[04:07.66]It really doesn't matter
[04:08.97]That you're on the list in front of me
[04:10.58]I'm gonna get your table,
[04:11.73]Cuz I always tip the maitre d'
[04:13.40]And then I'll go to Yale
[04:14.70]Because I am a legacy!
[04:16.68]I'm better than you!
[04:25.83]Carl:You suck, Johnny Rainbow!
[04:27.70]Lenny:I believed in you!