{Ladies and 
Gentlemen, 
Hobos and 
TrampsCross eyed mosquitoes and bowlegged ants
I'm here before you to stand behind you
To tell you something, 
I know nothing about
Next Thursday which is 
Good Friday
There's a women's meetin' for men only
Free admission, pay at the door
Pull up a chair and sit on the floor}
It's a long crawl back to the garden
So, get me off my hands and knees'
Cause the church keeps spittin' me out
Now, we all know where they're comin' from
We just don't know, where they're goin'
I am a Christian, 
I am a Buddha
Hare Krishna, 
I am a Jew
I am Satan, have 
Zen within me
I have Jesus, 
I am human
We got the same guy every time
In a brand new, clever disguise
So, before you go and make up your mind
If Christ came knockin' on your door
Dressed up like the 
Devil, would ya let him in?
Would ya let him in?
Would ya let him in?
Would ya let him in?
I hope this ain't the wrong direction'
Cause it all feels exactly the same
And it's gonna get me where 
I'm goingSo enjoy the ride and don't get hooked
All the same temptations
I am a Christian, 
I am a Buddha
Hare Krishna, 
I am a Jew
I am Satan, have 
Zen within me
I have Jesus, 
I am a human
I am a Hindu, 
I am a Sikh
I am a Muslim, 
I am a Atheist
I have Satan, 
I am a Christian
I am a Buddha, 
I am a human, human, 
I am human
I am human, human, human, human